SRS So... my fiance left me for a liar...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Error, Mar 20, 2005.

  1. Error

    Error ¿ti†le øut-of_order

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tysons Corner, VA
    Cliffs:

    Relationship is perfect. She meets this guy. I knew he'd be trouble from day 1, and told her exactly how I felt. She said not to worry, he was just a friend.

    6 weeks later, every single thing I predicted happened, and our perfect relationship ended. She ends up with him the next day :wtc:


    Causes:

    Me moving to Virginia (1,000 miles from Florida)
    Her meeting guy with no respect for our relationship
    Her falling for another man

    Dunno what to do. She'll barely talk to me now. I miss her tremendously as a best friend and as a partner. And now I'm alone in a new state with almost no friends, and not even her to talk to anymore.

    I want to nape this entire state and move back home, but I'm stuck here for a job :wtc:

    I'm just sad and lonely... any advice? DC/NoVA SUCKS as a place to meet people.
    </venting>
     
  2. ~*Pogovina*~

    ~*Pogovina*~ Whip it! Whip it good!!

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2001
    Messages:
    12,079
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Taylor, Michigan
    :hug: it sounds like her loss. She will progress in this relationship and will naturally find out her mistakes when things turn bad because of his disrespect for the boundaries of a commitment.

    Additionally, I would be prone to say that the relationship wasn't perfect according to her. Did she ever bring up things that you didn't see as a problem or complain to friends? Many women don't mention the issues that they have in an attempt to keep the peace, but will be more than willing to air it to their buddies.

    It sucks to go through this while you're in unfamiliar territory. Go out, meet people. keep your mind busy with building new stable relationships (friendships or otherwise).

    Hang in there.
     
  3. Error

    Error ¿ti†le øut-of_order

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tysons Corner, VA
    No... the relationship was sadly perfect. We rarely had even the smallest complaints. It all went sour the day she met "him", and decided that I was too far away all of a sudden. :wtc:
     
  4. ~*Pogovina*~

    ~*Pogovina*~ Whip it! Whip it good!!

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2001
    Messages:
    12,079
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Taylor, Michigan
    if this is the case and there was truly nothing wrong with the relationship, she was an incredibly unstable person and you're better off without her.
     
  5. Error

    Error ¿ti†le øut-of_order

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tysons Corner, VA
    I'm starting to agree... but she was the best person I've ever met. She had such a wonderful heart, a charming personality, smart, funny, cute, and honest. Literally, she met this guy and flipped over. There wasn't a bad bone in her body until he showed up.

    Thanks for the kind words. I need them... :wtc:
     
  6. ~*Pogovina*~

    ~*Pogovina*~ Whip it! Whip it good!!

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2001
    Messages:
    12,079
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Taylor, Michigan
    I've said this before, people wear masks. Some of the most charming, kind, loving, witty, beautiful women I've ever met have taken that mask off and revealed a lying cheating whore underneath. What she appears to be on the outside (Demeanor) has nothing to do with what she truly is on the inside (Nature)

    Digging through a good demeanor to find a good nature is damned near impossible to do. Sometimes it take years for someone to show their true colors. Sometimes (and I consider myself to be one of these cases) it's just a matter of a good heart but SERIOUS mental illness keeping them from reaching their true self. I'm not sure what her deal is, but it sounds like it could be either of those. :dunno:

    edit: you're very welcome. Sometimes I wish that I could take everything I've learned from my own life (so far) and download it into other peoples minds. It's complex but eye opening.

    :kiss:
     
  7. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    The only cure for a lost fiance is a new-gf. Whatever you do don't put your life on a halt, I encourage you to move on. Your new, which means new oppertunities. Your new enviroment has loads to offer , i just think you need to look a little better to what your outgoing possibilities are, and checking out where the people round those area's usually meet eachother. It would be best of you not to give up and to seek out for new oppertunties, as you move further you will grow in experience and will eventually most likely be able to find yourself a new partner.
     
  8. Big Ol' Balls

    Big Ol' Balls New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2001
    Messages:
    2,691
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Atlanta
    you're better off without her in hindsight. obviously it hurts now, but eventually you will realize that if she was 'perfect' then she would not leave you for anyone. not just 'him'. best of luck in moving on. my only advise would be to do things that make you happy. spend more time on hobbies, etc. don't let a relationship be the only thing you think about.
     
  9. Mine too. I'm better off. Birds of a feather flock together. I don't need the dead wait of a thief and liar in my life. And neither do you.
     
  10. johan

    johan Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2003
    Messages:
    5,123
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sahasrara; magnetic violet infinite
    I posted this on another thread, but it seems to apply here too:

    Well, yeah, but when it's right, I mean really right, the love is just *there*.
    It's almost impossible to stop it, it comes on so strong.

    If you have to really work at it, inventing all kinds of circumstances so it will seem like it just happened, carefully nurturing it like a boy scout coaxing a fire out of wet wood in a windstorm...well, it may light up but it'll always be susceptible to being blown out. By the very next pretty boy who comes along.

    And then you're back in here, saying things like "Our relationship was PERFECT, I don't understand why she would turn her back on us to be with HIM"

    See what you want to see, but at least try to keep it real. If you have to sweat blood to make this relationship happen, face it, she's just not that into you.

    Your efforts are better saved and spent elsewhere on someone more worthy.
     
  11. moose87

    moose87 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    5,269
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NY
    exactly.
     
  12. Budha

    Budha Guest

    It does man... I live there too. Um, go to college, its fun, you'll meet lots of people.
     
  13. Error

    Error ¿ti†le øut-of_order

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tysons Corner, VA
    I've already graduated college. Guess I'll just spend my time on dumb projects now :noes:

    Thanks guys, I needed some encouragement. We talked this morning, and I don't think I'll be hearing from her for a long time. Oh well, she was a good friend while it lasted.
     
  14. SilverJettaGLX

    SilverJettaGLX OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2000
    Messages:
    6,030
    Likes Received:
    7
    :werd:

    Id send her a thank you card
     
  15. Error

    Error ¿ti†le øut-of_order

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tysons Corner, VA
    Not until I can get at least a little of my stuff back :o
     
  16. Cautild

    Cautild New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2004
    Messages:
    69
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Miami
    it sucks. my girl left me to give her ex another chance. although they went out for over 4 yrs, he treated her like shit and all this stuff.
     
  17. jonez177

    jonez177 New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2004
    Messages:
    8,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Location, Location
    Well it couldn't have been perfect if she left you. It may be that you were no longer any challenge for her. Sometimes if you fall to hard for a women, they loose interest.

    This guy sounds like an asshole, something that she saw a challenge in conquering.

    Learn from this now, so you don't fall into the same traps in the future.
     
  18. Filmboy44

    Filmboy44 Guest

    I'll give you the best advice anyone gave me when I was in your shoes..."head up, it gets better...just have to wait it out"
     

Share This Page