So it looks like my engagement may never take the next step. (UPDATE! It's over.) My fiancée and I are at a huge roadblock. Here's the situation. I'm from Virginia Beach. My family is all there, which makes it convenient, but the real reason I want to move back is because of a HUGE job opportunity that would suit my skills and make for a very lucrative career. It would mean financial stability and great educational value. My father is able to hook me up because he knows most of the guys standing up this new infrastructure. She lives in Cincinnati. It's about a 12 hour drive from my hometown. She's never lived outside of home for all 22 years of her life. She is supremely uncomfortable with the prospect of leaving all of her friends and family behind, and told me that if she were to move in with me in Virginia Beach, she'd be "abandoning" her grandmother, who gives her guilt trips about leaving. I'm positive that she and possibly her mother have fostered this guilt to the point where she'd rather just stay home. We've been engaged since December 15, and I think it was rushed. We always knew this was an issue, but I was under the impression that she would move to where I would have a good career opportunity what with all of our discussions about being financially stable. Apparently this isn't the case. So now we're at this roadblock and I don't see her changing her mind. We've been together for about a year and a half now, but we've known each other for over 6 years. It really rubs me the wrong way when I think about her using the term "abandoning" when she refers to moving in with the love of her life. I mean, I can understand her hesitation to this. All she's ever known is home, and I know how it was to move out when I was 20. It was to go to Basic Training, so mine was a bit harsher than this hypothetical (which, up until yesterday, was all but a certainty), but I can still understand it and respect it. This is the biggest point I made to her last night: I'm not the kind of person who wants to put her into a situation where she's being forced to choose. None of this "what's it gonna be?" pressure. If she is on the fence about this, then I will do what I can to ease her decision. If she's this hesitant, then I don't think this was meant to work in the first place. It's funny...I'm not all that torn up about it for some reason. Maybe it's all for the best... EDIT: Well, it's official. We're no longer together as of the 18th. We're going to remain very very good friends and the breakup was very mutual, very intelligent, and uneventful...but still painful.