hey all of you. after 9 months of being with a wonderful girl i just got dumped. there seemed to be no real recent reasons other than after a while she considered we were incompatible. on an intellectual and emotional and physical level we were, but when the weekends came along i still wanted to see friends, go out, etc -- whereas she was more of the dayhike in a couple thing. i felt like we had each found a good level of healthy independence in the couple whereas she says that "i do my thing and she does her thing" isn't the solution she's looking for, and therein lies the incompatibility. i am 29, she's 23, and while she was still evolving, she now hints that i am the one who isn't on her level. that and i got the 'lazy boyfriend' speech. while im a good lover, a stand up guy, and i give a girl a lot -- she said she was hurt early on that i didn't taxi her around or do enough spontaneous things. whats strange is during this time she was really happy, and it showed, and so i can't put two and two together. deep down part of me still wanted a time to be single and wild before really tying it down and maybe this is the universe's way of me getting it. take that any way you want. i've been through enough to know that i'll be ok, but it sucks going from a relationship that on a whole was smooth and full of love to nothing. part of me feels like i failed, like i could have made the extra effort, then i look back and i was true to myself and what i want -- so maybe she was right about the incompatibility. cliffs: i knew what i wanted, she fell in love and adapted, eventually realized she wasn't happy with that adaptation, and left.