LGBT So an in-the-dark guy found out I was gay...

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by Jobe, Apr 21, 2005.

  1. Jobe

    Jobe keke ^_^

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    Near the beginning of this semester a presumably straight guy started talking to me in one of my classes. We briefly got to know each other and would talk before the lecture every now and then, he'd quiz me before a test and we'd laugh when I didn't know the answer... nothing real flirty or anything though. He just seemed like a cool guy and although I definitely find him attractive, I never came on to him in any way because my gaydar is pretty crappy most of the time :rofl: and I guess I'm too afraid to make mistakes.

    Anyway, I recently put one of those iron-on pride smiley-face patches on my backpack and he finally noticed it today. I was pulling some notes out of my bag and realized he was looking down at it. I said, "hey, what's up?" like I'd done several times before... but I got no response from him. :sadwavey:

    It was the look in his eyes as he gazed at the happy little rainbow. An almost sickening stare that pierced my heart. But it was something else... I could tell there was fear in his eyes. It was the look someone gives when they know something bad is going to happen but cannot change the outcome. Needless to say, I couldn't really pay attention for the rest of the class as I thought about how crappy that made me feel :hsd: What was he really thinking I wonder... hmmm
     
  2. Team503

    Team503 Guest

    :( Good luck.
     
  3. billy mack

    billy mack New Member

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    is he cute?
    and i like gay people, like will from will and grace, he is funny
     
  4. Sam Gamgee

    Sam Gamgee Every tool is a weapon if you hold it right. OT Supporter

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    Good luick with it.

    Hey, maybe you can open his mind to acceptance of differences...

    It's all our jobs (each and every gay and lesbian, bisexual, trangendered and the like) to educate. So, make this your mission.
     
  5. NOVAJock

    NOVAJock Modded & Underrated

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    Did I miss something intelligent that you wanted to say?
     
  6. coma

    coma New Member

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    Well now. If he recognizes the rainbow flag as a "gay thing" then he may be gay himself...or it hit a raw nerve.
     
  7. RenaultFreak

    RenaultFreak OMG

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    This is where I differ with you Sam, always did, always will.

    While I can understand some of that you really have to accept that:

    1) It's not your job to "educate", you can inform them, clear them out of doubts and show them the non-stereotypical gay orientation, lifestyle or whatever you like to call it (at this point I'm having doubts about the proper temr without upsetting you) but you can't force "the gay" in him, it is not his mission. I like to think that he should be able to live effortlessly without "having to educate" other people around him. This takes me to:

    2) Gays should also accept the fact that they can't be seen in a positive manner by EVERYONE, like other racial topics gays will always get suspicious looks just like blacks, asians, hispanics, skinny, deformed, germans and jews get (and other different people like Paris Hilton) . When you say that "you can open his mind to acceptance of differences..." you are falling into the very same topic as the guy, you are not accepting him, his own and personal way to think about gays. Isn't this true man? I hope you are open enough to see this.

    It is not my intention to attack anyone, in fact it's been a while since we got in a heated discussion :o and I kinda miss it :rofl:

    :ughug:
     
  8. Jobe

    Jobe keke ^_^

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    I'm going to have to agree with Renault on this one. I don't feel that I should have to make this guy accept me. Yes, the possibility of change is there, but In all honesty, I don't need another straight friend that I'm attracted to... it's caused way too many issues in my past :hs:
     
  9. LiekOMG

    LiekOMG New Member

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    It probably just came as a shock to him. After a day or two i'm sure he probably won't think of it anymore and will get back to normal. It would be pretty shallow of him if he never spoke to you again over something so insignificant.
     
  10. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    He probably thinks you dig him. Thats the funny thing about people finding out about you, evert straight guy you've ever looked at for more than one nanosecond thinks you want to bang them.
     
  11. Sam Gamgee

    Sam Gamgee Every tool is a weapon if you hold it right. OT Supporter

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    Agreed.

    Always will disagree on this one.
     
  12. Wolf

    Wolf No one plans to take the path that brings you lowe

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    :werd: I'd make a joke/comment about how you'd never want him (for whatever reason) just to reassure him that you're "just friends".
     
  13. Team503

    Team503 Guest

    Orientation would be the correct term - lifestyle implies choice, as well as a way of living life, and neither are attributible to sexual orientation. (My lifestyle is indie-rocker/motorcycle/geek, has nothing to do with teh ghey).

    As far as education, I do agree with Sam. It is everyone's responsibility to explain to people what being gay really is (as opposed to the tripe coming from the right-wingers' collective mouths). Can you force acceptance? Of course not - people are going to believe what they want to. But if they don't have the knowledge to make an informed decision, how can they do so?

    And I agree. Unfortunately, gay people cannot be seen positively by everyone, in the same way that other minorities (and sometimes the majority too) cannot. There will always be bigots and prejudiced people. But we can gain majority acceptance (which all the minorities you mentioned have - the pockets of "resistance" left and small and extremist).
     
  14. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    :hs: I agree. I think acceptance by people is more passive than active, and people should be left to deal with things like this on their own will. I think it's at least true. And I think the gay community wouldn't be so scary if they actually portrayed themselves as normal people, not another group. I really would just like to see the simple integration of people without having others make distinctions.

    And ironically I'm posting this in a gay-section of a board...hrm.

    But I'm likely to just be called stupid like the last thread. wooo!
     
  15. LiekOMG

    LiekOMG New Member

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    So did you guys ever start talking again? I'm curious over how things turned out.
     
  16. Dr. Giggles

    Dr. Giggles OT Supporter

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    Well that's the thing: Was he just an acquaintance or a friend?
     
  17. Jobe

    Jobe keke ^_^

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    Acquaintance at the very most. We don't really talk anymore.. he'll ask me for today's date but that's it.
     

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