She has the herp

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by themolsen, Nov 30, 2009.

  1. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    The girl I just started dating revealed to me last night that she has genital herpes. It's not a severe case and she hasn't had an outbreak in over a year. But this really sucks.

    I reaaaalllly like this girl, but this has changed everything. I'm scared to even get a blow job from her now.

    I don't know if I can do this now :hs: I was looking forward to being very uninhibited with her and having a lot of fun, but I don't want to get infected! I saw how much it hurt her to tell me about it; I don't want to have to deal with that.

    Anyone here have some experience with HSV (gotta find out if it's 1 or 2) they wouldn't mind sharing?

    I want to stay with her and develop a relationship, but I really don't know how I can now :hs:
     
  2. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    I've only ever dated someone who had cold sores. Not really sure why you'd be afraid to get head from a girl who had genital herpes though. Afraid to give head, I get, but unless she get cold sores too, getting head is completely safe.
     
  3. peoplescar

    peoplescar Guest

    Dude, 20% of Americans have genital herpes... I got it in HS actually :hs: but it was from my very long term GF who had a cold sore in her mouth. I had ONE outbreak and it was the original one. Not sure if she ever got it from us having sex but she never had an outbreak. I've always gotten cold sores since I was a kid though which you know is Herpes...

    on a side not I was never actually tested for it but the symptoms were there to a tee and she had a cold sore.



    Straight from Web MD

    How Common Is Genital Herpes?

    At least 45 million American adults and adolescents have genital herpes -- that's 1 out of every 4 to 5 people, making it one of the most common sexually transmitted diseases. Since the late 1970s, the number of Americans with genital herpes infection has increased 30%, mostly in teens and young adults.​
     
  4. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :werd:

    My advice: if this chick is someone you see yourself settling down with don't run because of the herp, but if you're not looking for long term it's probably not worth it.
     
  5. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :eek3: fffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, I knew it was too good to be true :sad2:
     
  6. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    :hsd:
     
  7. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    Did I call it or what?

    I have no idea how longterm this will go. I guess I'll let things progress how they are and just wait and see how I feel? I want an LTR, but I dunno if she's the one for that yet :dunno:

    I'm scared to get head bc I don't know if it's HSV1 (which causes cold sores) or HSV2. Either way, I'm scared to go down on her, which really sucks :hs:

    blahhhhh what to do, what to do....
     
  8. peoplescar

    peoplescar Guest

    just learn about it dude. Web MD has a TON of information on it. Its more common than you think and you can have a completely functioning relationship with it. best part about it is if you can both have a good conversation about it and learn together you will know that you both really care.
     
  9. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :werd: I'm with Flip on this.
     
  10. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    One of my friends has it and they were talking to me about it, showing me pics and sharing links. From what I read, I think you can get a blood test that will show antibodies and you can tell if you already have it? Also, iirc, its rare to contract a second type if you already have the other type, and also it isn't common for it to be present both in your mouth and on your junk. Read up on it and see what you can find. Maybe talk to Planned Parenthood too and see what information they can provide. They take walk-ins and you probably wouldn't have to make an appointment.
     
  11. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    Me personally..

    I would NOT do it. just think, if it doesn't work out w/ you 2 & you become infected... you will now have to tell everyone you're with about this & honstly, i cant see a lot of people going for someone w/ a lifetime disease like Herpes. If it's genital, it is MOST LIKELY HS-v2, which would be the red blistery kind.

    I've been stupid w/ the past 2 girls I've slept w/ & went raw dog, but luckily nothing bad came from it that I know. I wouldn't risk it though.
     
  12. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    Thanks for the input, folks.

    I've been reading about it all morning. In the end, it just comes down to the risk that I might contract it too, however small the risk.

    I JUST had a full STD test and am completely clean.... I would love to keep it that way :)

    yea, this
     
  13. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Think about how hard this conversation was for her to have with you. And think about how turned off of her it made you, at least enough to make this thread.

    Now think about you being in her shoes and having to tell the partner after this that you got it from your last girl... and how much it will suck to be seen as tainted/dirty and have that girl want anything to do with you.

    I personally wouldn't stick my dick anywhere that I knew could infect me.
     
  14. AgGoNy

    AgGoNy Active Member

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  15. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    GOD DAMN IT :wtc:
     
  16. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    Ugghhh I know she's worried I'm going to break it off... and I'm worried I'm going to. I feel so bad for her, and I feel bad for myself. It's just a really shitty situation. If there was any way we could continue on, I would do it, trust me. But we can't just not have sex :hsugh:

    I'm just really not into risking my health for it unless we were going to get married or something. I guess at least she told me now before we got too serious and it would be even harder to end...

    Part of me wants to end it now so I don't end up getting further attached to her, but the other part says I should keep it going for a while because it's so awesome right now.
     
  17. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :rofl: You say risking your health like it's gonna kill you.
     
  18. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    :ugh: Ummmmm I don't want painful sores or an incurable disease and stigma...
     
  19. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Social stigma isn't really a health risk. :mamoru: And from what I understand, today's medicine has made managing outbreaks relatively simple. :dunno: Many people go years and years without ever having an outbreak. But if it's a deal breaker for you, so be it. I just wouldn't call it 'risking your health'. Sounds melodramatic to me. :mamoru:
     
  20. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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    I thought they could only detect through antibodies in the blood? Did you have a blood test too? jw
     
  21. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    OK, it's compromising my health. I don't see how that's melodramatic to not want an incurable STD for which I'd have to take medication for most of my life. And you have to understand: I JUST got tested because my ex was cheating on me and I was worried to death about the results. I was so stoked to be clean! So it's hard for me to willingly put myself in a situation where I could get infected with something, let alone something that would be with me my entire life.

    I'm trying REALLY hard for it to NOT be a deal breaker
    yea. blood, piss and urethral swab. the whole shabang
     
  22. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Catching a virus that you'll never get rid of isn't something to take so lightly
     
  23. *RARA*

    *RARA* New Member

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    Honestly I don't think it's that big of a deal. I think people worry more about the social stigma than the disease itself.

    You could always wear a condom if you're that worried about it. Also I think 80-90% of people have HSV1 (cold sores- which can be passed on during oral sex) & I think 1/4 have HSV 2 (genital herpes).
     
  24. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Oh I agree entirely. It isn't something to take lightly at all. But when people talk about health risks it's usually something like cancer or heart disease. Not genital herpes. :rofl:
     
  25. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    Of course I'd wear a condom :hsugh: but it can be passed on anyways. And hell yes I'm worried about the stigma

    HSV1 can CAUSE cold sores, but it doesn't mean there are open sores in her mouth all the time, but it still makes me nervous. I'm finding out right now which type she has.
    IMO, "health risk" doesn't have to mean something life-threatening. But we're just pointlessly arguing semantics :o
     

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