sex rive

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by s34s0ns, Jun 25, 2006.

  1. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    -----> check next post
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2006
  2. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    OK, this is hard for me to even write down because it looks so fucked up aside from the fact that it is a touchy subject. I seem to have lost just about every ounce of my sex drive the past 6 months and I am only 19. I don't know whats wrong with me, i rarely ever get horny or aroused even when I'm about to have sex. I just can't seem to get into it at all. It hasn't been a huge problem until the past month or so with my new girlfriend who is amazing and is probably the best looking and sexual girl that I have ever been with. I can get hard with her but once we get to the point of actual intercourse my mind goes off and thinks about the problems i've been having in that department and I go soft almost instantly.

    Any advice for keeping my mind off of the issues and onto the moment? I've always been a sexual person so this is very off for me and is killing me when I need it the most :( She understands and says we can work on it, but I'm just worried that there will come a point where sexual satisfaction will outweigh our mental attraction.

    Please help me, so far I'm planning on working on healthier eating and better exercise even though I am in fine shape I just think that any little bit to make it easier to focus on the psychological problems should help.

    And I'm giving up coffee for this so it better make a fucking difference.
     
  3. Ore

    Ore OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2006
    Messages:
    7,999
    Likes Received:
    28
    Location:
    Hamilton ON
    maybe your gay? im serious. maybe you are under too much stress. try sex on e that might help you.
     
  4. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    marijuana helps alot for clearing my min an im fine when im high but i want to fix this without rugs... an for the recor i'm not gay but that's besies the point cause either way i'm not having any esire for sex : /

    an sorry for my malfunctioning key boar.
     
  5. tominos

    tominos New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2004
    Messages:
    897
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Portland, Oregon
    maybe you have adhd. try some adderall>?
     
  6. HuskiRuski

    HuskiRuski Cardinal Fan

    Joined:
    May 14, 2005
    Messages:
    15,613
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    San Francisco
    get into a situation where you aren't under pressure to perform to the fullest or go all the way. this may seem like 'starting over' but try handjobs and fingering her while watching tv or something. also, try to get 'in control' and be able to start and stop whenever you want.

    this is probably just a psychological problem and you can get past it eventually.
     
  7. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area

    yeah, that's what i was thinking also... it's just har because we won't see eachother much untill summer is over. So when we o see eachother the "pressure" is there, but i'm confient that i'll get past it.
     
  8. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    1. More sleep.
    2. Less stress. Deal with your problems.
    3. Less - gasp - DRUGS.

    Sexual arousal is hard to do when your body is tired, over-worked/stressed, and poisoned. Plain and simple.
     
  9. Don Ganja

    Don Ganja Drunk Driving > *

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2006
    Messages:
    4,333
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Life feeds on life
    lol @ no "d" key on keyboard


    your problem is probably just stage fright, similar to not being able to piss in public. you know you have a problem, and its that knowledge of the problem that is giving you the problem. if you had no knowlege of the problem, there wouldnt be a problem.

    i came down with stage fright (the pissing kind) for a few months. i fixed it by simply walking up to crowded urinals and staying there till i pissed, no matter how long it took or how many people came by and did their buisness. i knew that i was going to piss no matter what so it may as well be sooner than later, and magically i pissed.

    maybe you could try something similar :dunno:
     
  10. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    :ugh2:

    Poisoned huh? :hsugh:

    I love when people share opinions on things they dont seem to have a grasp on themselves.

    Drugs /= poison, atleast most of them. And he mentioned MJ specifically, and I believe E was mentioned in the thread. Neither of which are poision, although the neorotoxicity of E has yet to be determined (recent studies show it doesnt really "put holes in your brain" though). Also, most drugs are sexual stimulants, not supressants. Both while on drugs, and also with an increased libido while off drugs. Everyone reacts differently of course, but saying you arent sexual because of the poisonous drugs :)mamoru: ) you are putting in your system is a little unfounded. Its nice opinion, but I think the guy was looking for help, not a ficticious DARE story.
     
  11. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    Plain and simple... :hsugh:
    http://www.changetheclimate.org/news/sex.php

    So in the end, its not toxic at all, and throughout time drugs have been used to increase sexual relationships. As I said earlier, and this article restates, each person can be affected differently.
     
  12. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    More on that awful poison :hsugh:

    Edit: Forgot the link... http://health.2theadvocate.com/index.cfm?pt=itemDetail&item_id=9393&site_cat_id=8
     
  13. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    I saw this, I just posted the drug stuff because of other comments.

    You shouldnt use drugs to make something happen. Once you get things working again, its always nice to use them for an increased affect though.

    You sir, need a 'd' key! :rofl:
     
  14. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    :rofl: at the pro-drug folks.

    Generally speaking many drugs ARE treated *like* poisons by your body - your liver, kidneys, etc., all have to work to filter that crap out. My point? Maybe lay off it a little.

    Pot sure as shit never made me horny, nor did it make any of the friends I was hanging out with recently horny. In fact they all just sat and stared at my fucking wall. How does THAT help your sex drive? :dunno:

    And for each of your pro-drug stances (which, in my opinion, are kind of weak ...) there is always the other side. I'm not saying I'm right or your wrong, just pointing out that NO ONE KNOWS so chill.

    I also found links that say it causes cancer :rofl: and Asthma :dunno: but the point is ... anyone can say anything that they want to believe one way or ther other.

    My point? Maybe take a little better care of your body and it will take care of you. What's wrong with that? ;)
     
  15. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    Here's one that might *actually* be scientifically valid:

    http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?sec=health&res=9D00E1D9163BF936A15754C0A967948260
    So what is it saying? Both aphrodisiac qualities AND lack of testosterone.

    Enjoy.
     
  16. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    Thats what most people do...they laugh because they are too ignorant to understand.

    Believe what you want. I just think its sad that you are trying to tell people your false beliefs like they are fact. If you want to be an idiot, be an idiot :dunno: Many people live daily their daily lives reveling in their own ignorance. I was just trying to provide helpful information. If you want to get into a debate on drugs in general, you can start another topic and see how "weak" my argument really is. Maybe you should come prepared with facts if you are going to argue something you don't know...just "telling" me something doesnt make it real or true :mamoru: .
     
  17. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    exactly, we can go back and forth because AS I SAID, the effects are different on everyone.

    Of course, only sources that say what you want are scientifically valid :mamoru: Imagine that :hsugh:

    Listen, this isnt the thread for this. If you want to prove your ignorance on the subject, there are many other subforums for it.
     
  18. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2004
    Messages:
    7,705
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Another reality apparently
    The height of ignorance...believing that sources that only back up what you say are valid :ugh2:
     
  19. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    8,752
    Likes Received:
    0
    OK, folks, settle down...let's not turn this into a drug debate. I agree with the other posters...you're putting too much pressure on yourself. Over thinking will kill the sex urges every time due to nervousness and anxiety. As for the drugs, if you use frequently, it may not hurt to try to abstain for a little while and see if that makes any difference. But I'm guessing that it is all in your head.

    And one last thing...if you do think it might really be something physically, you could go see a doctor. Sometimes there are physical reasons for this type of thing.
     
  20. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    thanks for all the replies! ...but i o want to clear up that i rarely use rugs an it's only marijuana, i'm talking 4 times in the past 6 months. Yeah though the point was to be able to overcome this an fix my problem instea of use something to cover it up.

    The thing is MattThom just poste, it is all in my hea an i know that... but then i think about not thinking about it an it just fucks me up more.

    fuck. :wtc:
     
  21. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    So let's go over this...
    So what changed in the past six months? New job? New woman? Infection? Have you noticed any other physical changes? Lack of sleep? Only been eating Doritos for dinner?

    I know lots of people who get like that who go to work all day, party late into the night, and then are too tired to function. They drink lots of soda to stay away and by the time they get home they are dead tired. Being tired kills your sex drive. How are you sleeping?

    So maybe you shouldn't think about the problems? :dunno: Now, have you spoken to her and told her how you feel, and maybe ask if she can help keep your mind on track? :naughty: Sometimes asking for some help can work wonders.

    Maybe realize that sex can be more than just penetration? How about go down on her, learn some new tricks, see if you can please her in some other way in the meanwhile.

    Well, if you think about it like that, then *sure* you're going to get depressed.

    You know, it strikes me that you may be punishing yourself in some way? You mention that the new woman is hot and all, is it possible that in some weird way you think she's too good for you and you're self-sabotaging your relationship? I've seen that before...

    Well, as mentioned, be sure you get lots of sleep, too. If you're drinking soda, keep in mind that for some folks caffiene can stay in your system for up to 8 hours making it hard to sleep.

    If you can give us more details, maybe we can focus on the actual problem than bicker over useless BS, sorry about that! :wavey:
     
  22. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    Poco: So let's go over this...

    So what changed in the past six months? New job? New woman? Infection? Have you noticed any other physical changes? Lack of sleep? Only been eating Doritos for dinner?

    >Well alot has change in the last few months actually, but nothing on the negative... I got out of a shitty relationship an have been able enjoy myself more have been working out. I have been having a har time getting into a regular eating routine though i just on't seem to have much of an appetite now aays either, an i rarely sleep well. (but then again i never have been much of a goo eater)

    I know lots of people who get like that who go to work all day, party late into the night, and then are too tired to function. They drink lots of soda to stay away and by the time they get home they are dead tired. Being tired kills your sex drive. How are you sleeping?

    >I never feel like i have very much energy, for the most part i feel tire through out the ay. I never rink soa but i am a coffee aict but have been sober for 3 ays now! ...at least it's a start.



    So maybe you shouldn't think about the problems? :dunno: Now, have you spoken to her and told her how you feel, and maybe ask if she can help keep your mind on track? :naughty: Sometimes asking for some help can work wonders.

    >Yup, she's great we talk about it an she wants to help an is gratefull that i'm going out of my way to try an fix the problem, it's just that we won't get alot of time alone for the next 2 months to "work" on it.

    Maybe realize that sex can be more than just penetration? How about go down on her, learn some new tricks, see if you can please her in some other way in the meanwhile.

    >O i efinitely know that : P i love going own on my girl, but there's always that itch that nees to be scratche that i just can't get with anything but my manhoo.

    Well, if you think about it like that, then *sure* you're going to get depressed.

    You know, it strikes me that you may be punishing yourself in some way? You mention that the new woman is hot and all, is it possible that in some weird way you think she's too good for you and you're self-sabotaging your relationship? I've seen that before...

    >That is a huge possibility, i got out of a terrible relationship a while ago an this is my first real one since. Everything is perfect so far... except for this, an i was thinking that you coul be right maybe i'm scare that there's nothing wrong. An i think that knowing this i woul be able to fix those thoughts, but for somereason it feels like i am subconciously oing it.

    Well, as mentioned, be sure you get lots of sleep, too. If you're drinking soda, keep in mind that for some folks caffiene can stay in your system for up to 8 hours making it hard to sleep.

    >Not many habbit changes at all : /

    If you can give us more details, maybe we can focus on the actual problem than bicker over useless BS, sorry about that! :wavey:

    >Thanks a bunch for the helpful avice an questions, have efinitely mae me think about this in eifferent ways, any other replys woul be greatly appreaciate.

    >I'm hoping that getting myself into the minset that it's not a big problem an i can o it being confient shoul help.
     
  23. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    ...an a sie note, i also have 0 esire to masturbate... but then again i haven't seen any porn at all in over 3+ months so :hs:
     
  24. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    Maybe this has something to do with it. I got out of a crappy relationship a long time ago and had nearly zero sex drive because my ex was always stand-offish about sex, didn't enjoy it (it hurt her; tipped uterus), so it made me aprehensive. That lasted for about 6 months afterwards. Maybe something like that happened to you?

    Well, sleep is important. Eating good - or at least *relatively* good - can help. Maybe less coffee? More fruit? Stuff like that?

    Sounds like you're just over-tired.

    Some people with low self confidence will, in my experience, actually try to ruin their own relationships - subconsciously. It's like they feel unworthy, so they fuck things up. This is (in my opinion) because they have always been told they are unworthy, so they have to "live up to" the expectation.

    Knock it off! Clearly this woman is proof you're a great guy! :big grin:

    I think you just need to get more sleep, stay away from caffiene and alcohol (both disrupt sleep patterns), and remember to rest after working out. You may also want to eat more protien after working out.
     
  25. s34s0ns

    s34s0ns OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    8,027
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Bay Area
    Ok, thanks again, this has all helpe a bunch... but in reguars to the first response you ha, the problem wasn't her it was me. I was fine with sex an love it an everything but she pushe it fast an then kille it for me by "neeing" it all the time an when i wasn't in the moo she woul guilt trip the shit out of me. Even if i ha been having a horrible ay she was like, "i get heaaches if i on't have sex blah blah blah." I love sex but not when it feels like a job.... someays it woul be 3 times a ay an i' love it, but others it wasn't even enjoyable.

    an now it just feels like i never want it at all an it's hurting my new relationship that is great so far.
     

Share This Page