SRS scared about maybe starting a new relationship

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by zooenthusiast, Feb 12, 2007.

  1. zooenthusiast

    zooenthusiast New Member

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    alright so i had a really long relationship and i got out of it about a year ago. i was all for being friends and i really tried but his new girlfriend forbids him to speak with me etc. so that really hurt because i felt like my best friend was taken from me and i never got to say goodbye. but....

    recently i met this guy through a really good friend, and i don't know him very well but everytime we've hung out we've gotten along really well, he's funny, i find him attractive, he's got stability (something the ex lacked), and i just get a really positive feeling from him. my friend said that he planned on asking me out and i got really excited. but here's the thing, i'm terrified! i feel ready for a new relationship but i'm sooo scared of getting involved because i have so much baggage.

    how should i approach this? i mean should i go for it but go real slow? let him know where i am emotionally? mention the fact that i'm tenative at all?

    any advice is welcome.
     
  2. the ground folds

    the ground folds rest your trigger on my finger

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    you can't force yourself if you really aren't ready. If you still have your own issues that you need to resolve then it would be best that you do that first. If you keep them in the back of your mind then they will probably come into play sometime down the road.
     
  3. kingtoad

    kingtoad OT Supporter

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    Just have fun. :)
     
  4. the ground folds

    the ground folds rest your trigger on my finger

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    i think she wants to take it to the next level.
     
  5. zooenthusiast

    zooenthusiast New Member

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    well i know he is ready for a relationship, i mean i know he's not just dating around. and i don't want to date around or anything. i want something more serious. i just don't want to get ahead of myself.
     
  6. the ground folds

    the ground folds rest your trigger on my finger

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    well what was the baggage you spoke of?
     
  7. TheManLouisianaFace

    TheManLouisianaFace and decide!

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    :rofl: having an ex is baggage?
     
  8. johan

    johan Active Member

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    just go into it. slowly.
     
  9. zooenthusiast

    zooenthusiast New Member

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    the baggage is i dated someone for 2 years and they ripped my heart out. and i don't want that again. what kind of makes it weird is that the new guy used to be pretty good friends with my ex and they still have a lot of the same friends. also i just have a lot of personal issues with depression that are somewhat related to the situation with my ex and then just partly because i have depression.

    the fact that i have depression just makes me feel like i'd be burden and that's why i'm scared to get close to someone. i don't want to burden them.
     
  10. BlaXicaN

    BlaXicaN Active Member

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    i dont think getting with someone who is a friend of your ex is a good idea. i could never date any of my ex's friends because i would be reminded of my ex still. i like to start completely fresh with no prior associations. sorry to go against the opinions already stated, but that's just how i feel.

    edit: well i just reread that he USED to be your ex's friend. well if thats the case and they dont talk anymore, i guess it wouldn't be that big of an issue with me.
     

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