SRS relationship question

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by MudRacer4x4, Jan 24, 2008.

  1. MudRacer4x4

    MudRacer4x4 New Member

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    Can a relationship that starts at 19 have a chance at lasting? We care about each other alot. I hear different things from different people.
     
  2. Anudist

    Anudist Turnin' Jesus on, one lightswitch at a time.

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    Most people who get serious when they are young end up getting divorced. You're still in your development years, and you will change, both of you. I would wait it out before trying to get too serious.

    If you're relationship is just starting out, don't worry so much about it lasting, just have fun while you can.
     
  3. ridah626

    ridah626 OT Supporter

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    there is always that possibility of that happening. i know alot of people who have married their high school sweethearts and are doing very well even after 5-10 years. i mean its possible but it is pretty rare to be honest.
     
  4. Punky72

    Punky72 New Member

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    It really depends on the individuals involved. It depends on if you two know what it takes to make a relationship work and last.

    Communication and trust are the two BIGGEST things that you MUST have to be able to last. Realizing that every relationship (even friendships) take some work and you have to willing to compromise on some things. Setting boundaries and sticking to them are also important.

    It's just rare that people who are young really understand these things. It took me years and a couple of bad relationships to realize what it took to make one work. At this age you are still growing and changing into the person you will become. I guess if you know what it takes to make a relationship work, can grow and change together, communicate your feelings openly and honestly, and trust one another, you can make it last. Only time can truly answer your question.
     
  5. kiri

    kiri New Member

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    of course it's possible. the main reason why they usually don't work out is because from the ages 18-25 you change and mature very quickly and significantly, so many people grow apart during these years. but if you change and grow in the same direction as your SO, there's no reason why you can't end up together.
     
  6. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    they CAN, but that's no reason to assume they WILL.

    If you're happy, cool, but don't expect it to last a lifetime.
     
  7. kort2885

    kort2885 New Member

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    My fiance and I have been together since he was 18 and I was 17. We are now 21 and 20. We're getting married next year and I couldn't be happier. And I know there won't be a divorce in our future. We would do everything possible before we would get a divorce. Also my cousin and her fiance have been together since they were freshman in high school and now they're seniors in college. They are each other's first boyfriend/girlfriend and they're getting married this year. So it really just depends on the people and how mature the relationship is. If you feel like you want to experience your college years the way they are "supposed" to be experienced by messing around with other people, then you probably aren't ready for a long term commitment. But if you honestly think that this could be the person you may spend your life with, then I say go for it. If it doesn't work out, then at least you'll know instead of wondering what could have happened if you had just tried. Statistics aren't going to tell you whether or not you will get divorced some day.
     
  8. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    serious question. Why get married so early?
     
  9. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Other people's opinions and experiences aren't yours. Yes it's possible. You must do what serves you, and make your own decisions.
     
  10. kort2885

    kort2885 New Member

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    Well we'll be 22 when we get married (he'll turn 23 less than a month later) I don't think that is too young. Neither of us feel like we need to party and go out with tons of people just because we're in college and that's what you're "supposed" to do in college. It's not like we've been dating for 3 months and decided hey let's get married. We know that we're gonna get married some day so why wait. I don't want to be getting married when I'm 27 or 28 and having kids when I'm in my 30's. We don't really see a reason to date for another 5 years and then get married when we could just do it now. A friend of ours met his wife online when they were probably 18 or 19. They lived in different states and "dated" for like 6 months and then got married (which is completely stupid to me) But they've been married for over a year and are doing just fine. So we just decided that we'd rather get married sooner than later. We'll have been engaged for 2 years and living together for almost 3 years when we get married. We know each other about as well as you can possibly know someone.
     
  11. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    Anything is possible.
    But the person you are at 19 isn't necessarily the adult you will become.
    Do what you want with her, just don't produce children and don't get married for a few more years.
     
  12. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Maybe. But there's NO point in worrying when you've just met the girl. Why worry so much about a future? Take things as they come, day by day.

    /thread
     
  13. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    That's not what you said in the thread you made :hsugh:
     
  14. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    Of course you care about each other a lot, that's why you are in a relationship... That has nothing to do with the relationship lasting though. You didn't even say you love her so this is probably a pretty new relationship. Why are you even thinking about whether or not it will last? Just have fun and enjoy it for what it is. Don't waste your time worrying about things like that.
     
  15. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

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    not really, but then again it happens on occasion.

    Don't rely on it as others have pointed out.
     
  16. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

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    My aunt and uncle have been together since high school and they are in their late 50s now... so yeah, it's possible.
     
  17. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    The thing is...
    Okay the goal of marriage is not divorce.
    The goal of marriage is to stay married and in love 'until death do us part'.

    Can we agree on that?
    Is there anyone here that knows anyone that was looking forward to the divorce on there wedding day?

    So if this is the goal, and if death isn't something that is happening to either one of you anytime soon...

    Then what is the rush?

    I mean hey, so you don't get married this year. So you wait a couple of years. So what. A couple of years is just a drop in the bucket compared to how long you two will be together.

    And if you figure out in the meantime that she isn't 'the one' then you get bonus points for avoiding a divorce.
     
  18. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Your logic is unreasonable, stop embarrassing yourself. :o :cool:
     
  19. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    yes. how long are you hoping it to last for? ballpark?
     
  20. kort2885

    kort2885 New Member

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    Ok I admit I contradicted myself. Let me clarify...I couldn't be happier that we're getting married but our relationship is not perfect and there are things that I would change.
     
  21. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    How so?
     
  22. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Laugh, I made a funny. :o
     
  23. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    Oh.
    Okiee-Dokiee
     
  24. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    but how long do you want it to last for anyway? until death? a month?
     
  25. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    From what I recall this guy is very new to relationships...so I'm going to assume he's finally met a girl who cares about him, he cares about her-so he naively pictures their future with a possible marriage since he is floating on cloud 9 with all these early feelings.

    In other words, I doubt he's even thinking of an ending point considering he's asking if 19 year olds can stay happily married forever.


    Either way, he shouldn't be worrying. He should be realistic and just going with the relationship day by day.
     

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