Question of ethics...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by [HRT]Squirrel Master, Nov 4, 2005.

  1. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    So I broke up with my girlfriend of 2.5 years not long ago. She ripped my guts out and I really got no closure... she was going through a rough time and didn’t want to drag me through it I guess... Not the point but a little background on my state of mind.... which is kinda lost!

    Anyway, I took a girl from a local college out to lunch the other day, then that night i had another date with a girl from a different college. Both were awesome and the girls were great! Really attractive and just fun as hell! So tonight I have a date with a girl from another college (there are a ton of university's within driving distance here) and then again on sat with another one from the same school. Sunday I have a lunch date with a girl and then dinner with a different one.

    My question I pose to you is that I am not really looking for something serious... well I guess I don’t really know what I am looking for. I am just tired of that lonely feeling... I miss that person who is always there and the feeling of being in love... I don’t man whore but I have also never dated more than one person, so this is new to me. Is this ok on the ethics side? I am up front with these girls in that I am looking to have a good time. I don’t mention that I am dating anyone else and it hasn’t been a problem so far.

    Not sure if I will ever get over this last girl but I am giving it a shot. Think this is a good start to getting that done?
     
  2. RockChick

    RockChick New Member

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    well basically it is up to you.

    do you feel comfortable dating one chick after the other? do you feel comfortable to just "use" them for some fun?

    there will be people telling you to go for it, there will be people saying OMG no, dont do it but in the end it is your life... you make the decisions, so think about how YOU feel about the ethics and all that.
     
  3. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    You doing the exact right thing.

    In order to find the "right person," you are going to have to meet and date a lot of women. The odds of finding that "right person" immediately are very low.

    As long as you are honest with these women, there are no ethical issues.

    The real question is, what do YOU believe? We experience a lot of social conditioning and men are conditioned to only be with one woman...
     
  4. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    I have... I guess I dont see much harm in it as long as I am in it to just meet new people. What ever happens happens I guess. Just wouldnt be fair to these girls to do much else when i still have feelings for someone else ya know?
     
  5. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I disagree. I bet at least a few of those girls have feelings for someone else.

    I still have feelings for my "first love" from junior high, and I still have feelings for my ex-wife, even though I dislike her as a person now.

    You have to move on.
     
  6. RockChick

    RockChick New Member

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    so you kinda wanna have some fun to get rid of the pain?!?! is that what you are saying or am i totally wrong?
     
  7. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    I see your point I guess.
     
  8. purplebeast

    purplebeast The depths of hell and endless torture await all h

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    Whether is moral or not is very subjective. I personally see nothing wrong with going on dates with many girls at the same time. As a general rule I dont belive people expect exclusivity in the 1st few dates. After all, you have to see whats out there before u chose someone. I believe the issue is that it would not be moral to see many girls at the same time.

    Of course that brings up another issue. People have different views on what it consitutes to "see" each other. I had a girl that introduced me as her BF after the second date. And I've had a girl feel that its okay to keep going on dates with other guys for as long as we dont actually discuss becoming exclusive.

    This is the rule of thumb I like to follow. I dont bring up the subject nor do I stop going out or seek girls to go out with , until I start to feel that it would bother was I to find out she was on a date with another guy. Thats when I feel confortable discussing where we stand as far dating other people is concerned.
     
  9. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    as long as you are upfront that you arent into anyhthing exclusive atm, you are fine.


    just dont lie.
     
  10. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    I'm not a liar... so we got that covered :)
     
  11. RevBob

    RevBob You thought your burning hot steel slide was bad!

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    I have to agree w/ RockChick.

    I had a roommate that dated 2-3 girls at the same time. Even went as far as sex with 2 of them on the same day.(afternoon with one, evening with the other). I personally can't do that. I date one. If that doesn't work out then on to another. But never 2 at the same time. But that's just me.
     
  12. JustaMeThang

    JustaMeThang New Member

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    As long as you're up front, go for it. Im sure there are many women in your situation who are lookin for the same kind of set up. Have fun!.
     
  13. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

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    Yea I didnt think it was that big of a deal.... but I have always dated one at a time... like i said, there is nothing physical with any of them, and as soon as that happens for me it means there is an attachment so the others would have to go.
     
  14. Bernice

    Bernice New Member

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    Yes i think you are off to a good start. If you are honest and upfront with the girls and tell them you are not looking to date anyone seriously then you are in the clear. Maybe in all of this dating you will find a girl you want to stay with and quit having to go on so many dates and the lonely feeling will go away.
     
  15. purplebeast

    purplebeast The depths of hell and endless torture await all h

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    Hasnt everyone done that at least once or twice?
     
  16. armond

    armond New Member

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    It is subjective. You determine if it is moral to you. We can't do that for you. Now is it moral to society? Today's society probably has no prob with it. You are seeking someone, and it only makes sense to broaden the scope.

    Me? I am old fashioned in a sense. I am very exclusive, I date one at a time. If I find that person is not meeting my expectations/standards then I cut them loose. I am not a snobby person, but I want someone who takes care of themselves, good personality, ethic/morals, etc..
     

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