SRS question about gf's actions

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by sgnn7, Aug 22, 2006.

  1. sgnn7

    sgnn7 pos the neg hole

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    been together for 1.5 yrs and i still haven't met her dad nor met her friends more than a handful of times

    i could go and give you all the history, but this is the bottom line. any clue :dunno: ?
     
  2. Quiero_Mas215

    Quiero_Mas215 New Member

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    1st of all, have you even tried asking her why you haven't been introduced?

    You should know the answer to that if your communication is good. If not, then you have more problems than just not meeting her dad or some of her friends.
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    There are some people who are in such dislikement of family and family surroundings, that they escape and refuse to go back because they dislike it there. It might not at all have anything to do with her reluctant to introduce her to her family, she might just not like being in that spot, that's the only thing i can think of.
     
  4. OhFourTwoThree

    OhFourTwoThree New Member

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    Why don't you ask her yourself? It could be any of these reasons or a combination of reasons.

    1. She's embarrassed of you. Could be your looks, occupation, attitude, etc. Who knows.

    2. She's not that close to her friends/family. She doesn't associate with them much herself anyways.

    3. She's not that serious about you. Often times, people don't want you to meet and bond with their friends/family if they aren't serious and don't see themself with you in the long run.

    4. Her friends/family don't approve of you so she figured it's best not to bring you around them.

    5. She's embarrassed of her friends/family for some reason.
     
  5. sgnn7

    sgnn7 pos the neg hole

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    well, she definitively is close to her mom, but i don't know about dad. i've talked to her about this but the answer i get is always in the form of "it was just such set of circumstances." :greddy: the sad part is that all the 5 you listed seem plausible but personally i'm fearing #3. if that turns out to be the case, i think i'm just waisting my time and would like to move on. any way i can find out if it is?:hs:
     
  6. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Brother, there is no way I woudl settle for that asnwer. Maybe at first when dating, but it's been 1.5 years and you deserve an explaination.
     
  7. sgnn7

    sgnn7 pos the neg hole

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    in college both. i'm 1 yr off of my masters and she from bachelors. i don't work but she does (i live off student loans :naughty:). i invite to all things w/ my friends but it just doesn't seem returned even after talking to her. granted she's seeing less of them and more of me but it's still bothering me that it seems like she's isoliting me in a way
     
  8. Ladybird

    Ladybird New Member

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    I have been with my SO for nearly 2 years now and I have met his family a bunch of times and thats all dandy. But up untill recently I had not really met his friends, I found this weird and used to confront him all the time and he would just say that he liked to keep the two very different aspects of his life seperate, which makes sence if you think about it.
     
  9. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    The only time I have ever known anyone to do this had some pretty sneaky selfish reasons for doing so. ie, they were cheating or holding out for someone else. It simply is not a good enough explaination to say, "I like these two lives to be separate" especially when your partner isn't happy about it. They need to provide a better more in depth reason than this. If someone accepts this answer, then they set themselves up for the consequences.

    On a related topic, a friend of my fiance' (Jill) was telling us how her boyfriend of 2 years has a myspace account. He isn't friended to Jill because he said his myspace is for his old friends only. He also has his status as single and has no pictures of Jill on his myspace.
    Well my brother has a seperate myspace account of a girl that he used in an experiment to learn what it's like to be a cute single girl getting hit on all of the time. I logged into his fake girl account and sent an invite to this guy to see how far he will take it if I show interest. We'll see how well this stupid excuse really holds up... stay tuned.
     
  10. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    Hmmm I would say if the relationship is new, it wouldn't be unusual to want to hold off on introducing an SO to friends/family. But if you've established that you're in a committed relationship, and it's gone on this long, then something's fishy. My husband and I knew each other's friends/families within a few months of beginning our relationship. We didn't often hang out with each other's friends (the ones that were not mutual friends) but we didn't have a problem with them coming around either and being around the other either :dunno:
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    no, that does not make sense when u think about it

    especially if u think about it a little longer
     
  12. sgnn7

    sgnn7 pos the neg hole

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    i know that her actions seem a bit shady:hsd:, but at this point, the question is what to do.... keep confronting her? do the same to her? break up? treat it as a "casual" relationship? :dunno:
     
  13. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Demand a full explaination. She owes you a better one than she has been giving. It's been 1.5 years and her leaving you wondering what the deal is simply isn't right anymore.
     
  14. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :werd:
     
  15. Ladybird

    Ladybird New Member

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    Well I am still with him and now that everything has cleared up its even better, I can see your reasons why you may think this tyype of behaviour is shady becuase quite frankly it is however I knew he woudl never cheat on me as he has very few girls who are friends and the only people I hadnt met where his guy friends.

    I guess it may seem weird but its also out circumstances, I am a couple of years yonger then him and he went to a different school so to me it is pretty logical that our frienship groups wouldnt meet. but thats all over now.
     
  16. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    I couldn't possibly be less interested in MySpace. I don't mean that in a bad way. What I mean is that if my girlfriend had a MySpace account I don't think I would care about it at all.
    If she was 'single' on it I still wouldn't be bothered.
    Truthfully, there would be no linking me to it cause, well, I have no use for Myspace.

    Here is the thing. At least the thing as how I see it.

    I don't want to date someont that is cheating on me.
    I won't cheat on a woman. Period. I simply won't do it.
    I will break up with someone though.
    I would appreciate the same curtisy from her. If she sees it fit to use a myspace account to hit on other guys then I would rather the relationship be over then to have to deal with that.

    Having said all that.
    Be careful what you wish for. I mean, if he responds to you and you to get at it - do you really want to be there? What do you do with that information then?
     

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