PUA Where is it all going?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by i dangled you, Jul 9, 2007.

  1. I am at a point in my life where I have a wonderful girlfriend and great life. I have been talking to Kalypso for awhile and he is a god among men. Everyone here, when Kalypso is right, he is right. So thank you brother :bowdown:

    This in no way is a call out to anyone, if you are mentioned in this thread, it is a matter of respect and an open question to you, for you to answer.
    Now onto the post. I have watched all these PUA's, from, to Yail, to Poco, to XaPU!M, to Falconer, to Ware_RU, to Viper, to JohnJohnJohnson, to Sqlee, to myself. We all share something in common. We all came here after a major loss or break up in our lives. We worked hard to get where we are, we wanted to overcome the loss we suffered and never go through the same problems we did again. We read all sorts of books on PUA, how to handle realtionships, how to be real men, and masculine men. We have the views of sexists in women's eyes. Deep down though we are all trying to prevent this previous problem from happening. We may say it's not a fear of ours, but if it wasn't would we be here giving advice to others, going out and making field reports about this all?

    We sit here day in and day out arguing with the women of the forum, and saying our views are right or that what we have said is very well grounded, but deep down I believe we all hope to never go through what we did that forced us to come here. I know all of this is true about myself. I try so hard to make things work for myself. I took everyone's advice, I went out, I worked hard to polish this whole pick up skill in my mind. How to approach, what to say, how to say it, but deep down, this was all to cover up a deeper insecurity of being hurt. If anyone else shares this same feeling it's fine, if not please explain why you are here and so big on being into this PUA scene.

    I don't support most of the women in this forum, but I do have a deep respect for Iwishyouwerebeer and demosnat. So these two make a major impact on my opinions as well. I find I am easily if not most of the time looking to Iwishyouwerebeer to better understand women, because she is my female support throughout all this, she explains things from a female's perspective and makes things clear to me. So I want to thank her now. And she knows her job for this thread.

    Let me get back to the point at hand. I may be one of the most successful people on this forum, but deep down, I'm not here to be part of a PUA culture, I just want to understand women better and to be able to prevent past problems from happening again. Maybe we all on some level are insecure, but we do a good job at hiding it. The PUA's though, we are very strong here, we have a dominance over this forum, people look up to us. From Yail and his success stories, to Poco and his be a genleman idea, to Ware_RU and his life's self improvement quest. To Viper and his enjoy your life and they will come idea, to Falconer's want to make it, Johnjohnjohnson, who is very important to who I am today, and XaPU!M, who I agree to his methods without a doubt, every single one of you, have impacted me in some way and for that I am grateful. The one thing I have been eager to know about all of you though is, is this what you want, do you believe this is the future and are we all headed in the right direction? I think we are, but at the same time we have so many people against us, we don't think like the crowd and that makes people upset. W are Black sheep in this world fighting a battle that we didn't have to so many years ago. Maybe it is the times and we are the beginning of an era. I think it's time to understand and put this forth that we as PUA's or as people who genuinely love women want to become better. To treat women better overall. To make them happy and to be their saviour from this boring world. We support women and want them to be happy, because as males it is our nature to want to make the females of the opposite sex cared for and protected. No matter what the means or the methods. Any one of the people in this thread feel free to disagree with me, you are the ones this thread is written to, the rest are insignificant.

    Now all of you, that I have mentioned, please understand that the women of the vag will always disagree with you, but deep down, they wish to some extent one of us was part of their lives. I know I have a few females that wish I was part of their lives. The one thing I have learned though, no matter how much you read, it doesn't compare to one night in the actual world seeing things in action. So what the major point I am getting at is, if you are a PUA or into this culture, are you trying to prevent some previous problem from happening again or are you trying to make yourself happy?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 9, 2010
  2. Kalypso

    Kalypso New Member

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    I'm just trying to feed my ego by posting things and having people agree with me.

    Looks like I was successful =D <3
     
  3. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Both.

    I was introduced to PUA because my original goal was to improve my charisma and social skills to improve my life, not just for chicks. But researching that lead to PUA, which I must admit was pretty seductive (no pun intended).

    That's really the aspect of my life that I suck at the most. And I still really suck at it. I always just thought there was something wrong with me that made the majority of people not want to talk to me or continue conversation with me. I'm smart, I'm very good with money, I have a decent job, I'm at least a 5/10 on the looks scale (knock on wood), etc., but for some reason, I fucking blow ass when it comes to being social. But at least through studying social dynamics I'm starting to begin to understand why I suck at it.
     


  4. I'm just curious, in a nutshell, it is because of your looks, right? You are insecure with the way you look to a certain extent.
     
  5. No because of his self-fulfilling self-image.
     
  6. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I have a little body dysmorphic disorder. I have serious issues with my looks. However, I have a feeling that other people don't notice the things that I do.

    That being said, I usually feel like I am at least as good-looking as half the guys in any given average environment. This weekend, for example, this guy that I would have objectively thought looked like a huge nerd physically was getting attention from an HB8.

    I have huge image issues but I don't think that looks are necessarily my problem. I think that I believe they are, because of my old and incorrect value system (basically, if you're good looking you will be successful socially, and if you're not successful socially, it's because you are not good looking. This was based on my assessment of females and I assumed that it applied to males as well, but it doesn't, and it took me about 5 or 6 years to finally begin to realize that).

    Summary: There is something wrong with me that makes me suck socially and makes people not want to talk to me or introduce themselves to me, but I don't think it's 100% because of how I look, which is what I used to think.
     
  7. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    cliffs:

    be confident, funny, take care of your body, dress well, dont be a doormat, yada yada. this is what i took from 'pua' books and i think the average male should do the same. keep these things in mind instead of over complicating shit and trying to go out and be a wizard casting spells on girls
     
  8. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I take offence to being called a PUA. I think this whole PUA movement is pathetic. 99% of the "PUAs" out there can talk the talk, but still can't even talk to a girl. It's sad
     
  9. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    It was not any specific event or experience that got me here.

    I relived the following scene many times a day for most of my life.

    I would see a beautiful woman. Let's say I'm about twenty feet away from her. I feel a deep, almost painful compulsion; whereupon I find myself powerless to satisfy that compulsion, and I look down at my bowl of Cheerio's and feel horrible. I blame myself for the pain in this experience and I hate myself for it.

    I have been attempting to put a dent in that perspective. I was in the process of putting a dent in it when I fell in love by accident and decided to put that journey on pause.

    Unlike Viper, however, if what I'm saying isn't field-tested multiple times over, by myself or by others, then I'm not SAYING it. 0% keyboard jockey bullshit... and as you can see I don't harbor delusions that pick up is a bitter, dark world of predatory men... I also don't say "I understand women" while sitting at home on my ass complaining about seduction gurus. There are depths of self-delusion that I have yet to plumb.

    That's also why I CAN go out and do pick-up... if I told myself I was a man who understood women, then what would happen to my self-image when a girl rejected me? Fortunately I don't have an ego to protect. I don't think of myself as a PUA, because a) I'm not anywhere close and b) it creates an ego problem that interferes with pick-up, as u can see with Viper, real life friends, etc.

    What I'll do is I'll quote this blog from a land far, far away.

    Whatever works

    Perhaps. Agree to disagree then :hs:

    That's because guys go around calling themselves PUA's based on how much second-hand knowledge they've acquired. I'm an encyclopedia on this shit, but at the top of my game last semester I was not a PUA. I was just a lot better than an AFC...

    Presently I've been out of the field for a couple months. I've only ever been in the field FOR a couple months. Taking into account encyclopedic knowledge of pick-up, that makes me, right now... an AFC.

    I'm going to adjust your statement accordingly
    You will begin with a scarcity mindset. Fight that and don't stick to the first HB8 who will fuck you.

    I won't be eloquent enough to give a good definition, so I'll give an example.

    Ask a guy, "Would you still want to be with ur gf if you had five or ten truly stunningly beautiful women offering you constant sex?"

    The reason he can't answer honestly (assuming his GF is not in the room) is bc of a scarcity mindset... so actually, he IS answering honestly, he's just not answering truthfully, because his imagination is hampered by 10 years of deprivation.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 9, 2010
  10. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    lightning bolt!
    :rofl::rofl:
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :Ownedd:

    there's too much over analysis and shit.. jonno's like "guys, it's SIMPLE" :rofl:
     
  12. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Some people call us superficial - or they don't even call me that outright, they just use implicatures to that effect. I'm really open about myself on this forum, so I've seen a lot of that here, as you all know.

    The message: "You should work-out / improve-social-skills / whatever, for YOURSELF. Not for other people."

    Or: "JJJ, your life revolves around women."

    ...yeah. Pretty much. It should all BE for myself, and honestly it does REVOLVE around women.

    :noes:

    I don't have the qualms like I'm supposed to about that. If you think about it from a distance and just look at it logically: as if getting LAID by really hot girls, or finding love, is NOT doing something for yourself.

    Yeeeaah... right.

    People will criticize you. But they see you 1 day walk into a room and they look again and they look a third time and they wonder suddenly when, exactly, you became so ... different.

    You get a taste of that when your old circle of friends look at the girls you've been getting with and start asking each other when your game got so tight.

    I had a moment to laugh about that with a friend of mine who knows what I've been up to. (She's a VERY cool person.. she is probably my closest friend from college right now.) I think people are mostly slow. They need to see to believe. That's not necessarily a bad thing.

    I guess my main point is not to let people drag you down.. don't even let people who entertained the idea of pick-up, and then gave up on it, and stayed home, get you down. It's all noise.

    As always... do what works. :wavey:
     
  13. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    I wasn't on the list, but I'll throw some thoughts down here anyway.

    I came here because I consider myself more horny than your average male. So I saw sex and you had me clicking before I considered it. I also made the connection that I have been very shy with females. You could say I put the pussy on a pedestal if you want. I decided that I want females in my life and I also enjoy the stress relief that fucking offers along with the attraction. I've come here to better myself socially and to help progress myself in this world to finding the PERFECT female for me.

    Will this work? Who knows. I think it will because we are a group of people agreeing or disagreeing with what works on the outside. We can learn from each other to better ourselves for tom. Similar to Falconer I'm very smart savy. I have more money than the average 19 year old and it's all invested. I make 14/hr for my summer job. I'm learning to become a CSC major at what is considered a quality college. Later in life I want to own multiple businesses and I want an MBA to learn that aspect. I'm teaching myself finances and investing. So you can call me a nerd.

    I like the statement however about well rounded people. I feel this is true with everything in life. You need to eat balanced diets. Diversify your funds. Everything is about being good all around. This is the area where I lack. I can be shy for some reason. I view hot, attractive females as goddesses. I think this is from masturbating to females as if they are unattainable. That is why I'd like to change myself so I can get sex, have fun with the opposite sex, and find a female that counter balances me for support and company to make my life happier. It's probably also instinctual that this happens as it's part of my upraising and I just suck at it.
     
  14. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

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    dude you're making a lot of assumptions about people you do not know. i've wanted to have sex with hot girls since my balls dropped. maybe even before that, I can't remember. You don't need to have a hole inside in order to enjoy sticking your dick in others. Here's a concept:

    Having sex with girls feels good. It's fucking FUN!!! You don't have to be bitter or heartbroken or insecure to be able to enjoy having sex with girls. It's normal. It feels good. It is FUN.


    good luck
     
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2007
  15. Shrug

    Shrug Die in a Kimbo fight

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    damn man that was kind of deep. Honestly (im NOT trying to be a dick) you seem to fancy yourself as a black sheep, going against the grain, but to me it seems like what you're striving to do is assimilate into a culture of people who already had enough confidence to lead a happy life without self help literature.


    isnt the point of being a PUA to get a lay but isnt necessarily to sustain a healthy longterm relationship? it seems like people get bogged so far down in the science of personality that they missed some fundamental truths, alot of girls today in THIS particular culture can be won over (for a night) with alot less psychology then what you guys seem to put into it.

    but i think you nailed it right on the button when you asked if that is what makes you happy. I dont think anyone would be jealous of someone who lays a different girl every night if they were not into that promiscuous type of lifestyle and would rather be with a girl longterm they felt something for and the exact opposite could also be true, some jsut dont want to be tied down.

    again not to sound insulting but it would seem if the motivation for self improvement is just to validate yourself by getting as much sex as possible because you were made fun of in highschool and no one paid attention to you thats probably not the healthiest reason (and i suspect it might jsut be the most prevalent) but if you do what you do because you like to do it, why the fuck not, it's your life.
     
  16. Shrug

    Shrug Die in a Kimbo fight

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    also whats all this talk about understanding women, of course women and men are different but uh. every person is different guy or girl, i dont think theres a way to 100% understand a person unless you are that person so stop trying :o
     
  17. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I'm not a PUA.

    I don't understand why I always get placed in that category.

    I don't do pick-up. Never have, probably never will.

    What motivates me is all the men I see who are disrespecting themselves in their dealings with women.

    That used to be me, and I want to help my brothers understand these issues so they can avoid falling into those traps.
     
  18. One more time, I made that as my reason to be here, and made an assumption and asked people to correct it, so far a few have.

    I'm in a relationship now, I don't care for random lays, I'm the happiest I've ever been now.

    I say PUA in Viper's sense of the word, overall well rounded happy individuals. That strive to get better. If this is not your idea of it then I have placed you in the wrong category.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 9, 2010
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    Awesome :bigthumb:
     
  20. Shrug

    Shrug Die in a Kimbo fight

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    :werd: been with same girl for going on 3 years.

    sometimes when i think back about chasing girls before this relationship i remember all the good times but mostly it was just kind of shitty getting drunk and trying to lay girls i never cared about.
     
  21. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    To me, Pick-Up Artist = Speed Seduction

    I'm all about actually taking women on dates, not trying to take them home from the club and fuck them (but if thats what a guy is into, I have no issues with it).

    That's what PUA means to me: a guy like Mystery laying a chick he brought home from the club. That's not what I do and its not what I teach.
     
  22. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    Didn't mean to post this in the other thread.

     
  23. I don't see PUA as that, I don't care to pick up to get laid, I may pick up for friends, but not for myself.

    I hate random one night stands, that takes no effort.
     
  24. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    I just got this PM from a Vag poster that I will keep anonymous. However I just really thought it applied in here:

    We both have been here a really long time and ever since the latest editions started to post I feel things have begun to head in the wrong direction. Things have really turned away from improving your self to just use PUA or be the alpha male and that is quite useless advice. As I stated in another thread this is just a replacement for actual substance and the fact of the matter is that if a guy is really having serious problems such as just getting a phone number then there is really more wrong then just needing to speak up. Most types of PUA to me is throwing pink icing on a burnt cake, it looks good until you eat it.

    I really feel that this forum needs to make a change back towards the golden years when people used to offer advice on building confidence instead of pink icing. I think I have been around here just too long and I would self ban for a while if I didn't pay for a sub.
     
  25. I think this forum has gone to shit, it has become a cluster fuck of PUA vs. non-PUA shit, I just want to improve my life that's why I came here. That was the point of this whole thread.
     

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