ok so I have been married to my wife for 7 years. My sister in law is married to my wifes brother and they have been together for 4 years. I have had the biggest crush on this girl for 3 years now. Not just a wham bam thank you mam kinda crush, but a girl i would like to marry kinda crush. So today I call her and ask her if she can talk and she says yes. I tell her that i have something to ask or tell her but no one can know especially my wife and her husband. I asked her if she still wanted to hear what i had to say and she said yes. So to make a long story short I went through everythign basically telling her that I have a crush on her. She i sbeing very quite on the other line and I ask her if she is mad at me and she said no not at all. I ask her what she thought about what I just told her and she said that she had no idea and is dumbfounded, shocked. I asked her again if she was sure she wasnt mad at me for telling her this and she said no again. So basically I told her to just think about what I told her and talk to me when she is ready to. She agreed to this and that was the end of the talk. So what do you think is happening? Am I a complete ass for doing this? Or is it along the lines of if you are not happy try to make yourself happy? If she gets back with me and says yes she is intrested what should we do from there? should we do the entire dateing thing before we tell our s/o's? whats the dealio?