I'm sitting here still awake because I'm worried about the surgery that I'm having in the morning. I have really bad anxiety and I have panic disorder.. I'm scared of having a panic attack before or during surgery and not being able to calm down.. They gave me 10mg Valium tablets to take before I get to the hospital to try to have me calm by the time I get there, so hopefully it helps me out with that. Quick story is I was in the hospital for 6 weeks with flesh eating bacteria, so all of the surgeries previous to tomorrow's were always done while I was knocked out by anesthesia (put to sleep before it even started) then I would wake up and it would be done.. helped with pain and anxiety, even though they still had to give me morphine and fentanyl afterwards for the pre-surgery pain which is expected. But what also has me even more worried is I have a surgeon that does not want to use anesthesia for this surgery on my leg.. He ONLY wants to use Novicaine to numb the areas that he is working on!!! Everyone that I have talked to so far said that Novicaine is NOT enough for a serious surgery like this one... and because I already have chronic pain, it will be 10x as worse.. It's my first time going in without being asleep.. How do I get them to give me more pain medications and something to calm me down during the surgery, since they aren't able to put me asleep for this one because they consider it a pretty simple procedure - even though for me a 10 minute procedure can seem like 5 hours of hell, if you know what I mean! Sorry, I just had to vent about this because I can't sleep and I don't know how to go about this, first time for me as I said.. One of my nurses told me today that I'm the patient so I have the right to TELL them that I NEED pain medication for something like this - not just novicaine (I know the novicaine doesn't work for this type of procedure because they tried it once and I was screaming, worst pain of my life... and I consider myself a pretty pain-tolerant person and won't make a noise at all).. Any quick suggestions to calm down before the surgery and what to tell the nurses?? Maybe I should just tell them exactly what I'm writing but for some reason I feel like they aren't going to want to do it, I don't know why?? Anyone? Thanks!!!