SRS Please use me as perspective if you think you have it bad

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by familyguy101, Aug 16, 2007.

  1. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I'm very shy, i'm angry, I'm paranoid, i'm fucking miserably unhappy, i'm horny all the time. Sexually, I've never felt a woman touch me nor have i've ever touched a woman. I probably never will. I have nobody to turn to in my life anymore. My older brother has become cold to me. I've only had one time in my life where I had friends I actually liked, but they all abandoned me. I'm lonely, i'm emotionally unstable, people know i'm fucked up and they treat me like i'm very fragile. I would rather have zero guidance than the limp-dick, spineless guidance I got from my parents. My father is a fucking coward. No backbone whatsoever when dealing with people. Sad, shrewd, bipolar little man. That is all I had to look up to in my childhood years. No fucking wonder I'm the same way. It is impossible to have a mature conversation with the guy. This is the hand i've been dealt in life. There is no way out of it. I absolutely HATE my entire family and have hated them for as long as I can remember. I want to move out but it wont happen because I need a place to stay while I work/school.

    I want to get laid. I want sex. I'm a sexually frustrated mess. Girls are supposedly big whores nowadays but even I can't manage to get anything. I don't even try, I have to much anxiety. I would never bring a girl back to my shitty house to meet my, fuck I hate them, family.

    I'm fucking losing my mind
    I'm fucking losing my mind
    I'm fucking losing my mind

    It's such a shame that a person has to live this kind of life. Life is a beautiful thing. I worry that I will never experience it. Down in a fuckin hole, no soul. Drugs don't even help me anymore. They just amplify the void in my life and I can't even escape from reality to get away from it all.

    I hate people. I hate how your all brainwashed with you IPOD, MYSPACE LOLOLOLOL, MTV THE REAL LIFE (it isn't fucking real), THE HILLS, PUSSY SHIT MUSIC. Very few Americans care about the less fortunate. More for yourself, less for everyone else. Something in this country is terribly fucked. Americans are an evil soulless breed.

    I have so many problems with myself. I see so many problems in the world as well. Maybe they are all in my head, but I definitely see them. Nobody else seems to notice, nobody seems to care. It's all about where the pussy is gonna be at tonight, right? As for women, 99% fuck around with guys that they shouldn't. Women are fucked in the head worse than me, except they don't realize it. So what the fuck in the world is stopping me from just grabbing a dumb bitch with bit tits, being a fuckin prick to her, and she'll sit on my dick for it? It doesn't make any fucking sense!!! Why the fuck do these dumb fuck whores have the same rights as me?

    The only reason I say I have problems is because I've been told so many fucking times that I have problems. Especially by my parents, especially by the shit stain on the world's underwear, also known as my father. But who knows, maybe it's just everyone else who has the problem.

    I was always under the impression that you find someone of the opposite sex and you two develop a relationship with each other. In other threads, people are saying that you shouldn't be in a relationship while in high school. They are saying that high school/college should be a time put away for sex. Since when did people just start fucking each other. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE HEART IN THAT

    I hate EVERYBODY. Before you unqualified psychologists start telling me that I NEED to see a therapist, please take into consideration that a big chunk of my anger comes from the frustration of seeing that things are so fucked in America, and yet half the people are too stupid to notice, and the other half just turn their heads.
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2007
  2. Takitome

    Takitome New Member

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    Life can be a beautiful thing and you choose how to live it. Life is what you make it. So you have it tough, alot of people have it tough. The key for improvement or just survival is to stop blaiming other people for your own problems and end your hate.

    I used to be angry alot when I was a teenager too. Untill I finally admitted it wasnt doing me any good and hate was ruining myself and people around me, which just made me more miserable. You see most good and bad things are a point of view.
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
  4. oatmeal

    oatmeal New Member

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    Familyguy, I’m not going to tell you to see a therapist because I use to see one and it never helped. What I might suggest is that you stop hating so much. Hate seems to be a powerful negative energy that drowns a person in sorrow. This hatred, for me, left me alone, no family, no friends… nothing! Just my self locked away in my mind.

    I use to hate my mother and blamed her (and the world) for everything. To piss he off I move two states away and never called home, but she would always call and I would hang up on her every time. A few years had gone by and I heard no response from her… So to get back at her I took a bunch of pills and then slit my wrist… I woke up in the hospital and there she was staring at me in a way that I can not even explain. I treated my mother like shit all those years and there she was…. Here to support me with all the energy she had left… ya see all those years I hated my mother she had grown old from stress and worry that I created for her. Something in me snapped, I guess I had an epiphany… Hatred was killin’ me slowly and mother was the victim of my self demise.

    I don’t really have a point I’m try to make I just want to share my story with you and hope that something will click over in your mind and you find a way out of your current way of thinking…. Be well.
     
  5. ///M Pilot

    ///M Pilot New Member

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    I wouldn't say you're in need of therapy, just a good dose of reality.

    Stop the self loathing and lose the victim complex, and the rest of your life will get better.

    There are good people all over the world. Surround yourself with some. In all actuality, you probably don't hate people. It's more likely that you've built up a lot of resentment because a) you've been abandoned and b) you're quite arrogant and have been obviously ostracized by people that you feel you're better than.

    Learn from your experiences, use them to better yourself, and to direct your life AWAY from being that type of influence to someone else. Just because people were shitty to you, doesn't mean you have to continue the cycle.
     
  6. mahal.

    mahal. mahal kita? OT Supporter

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    life is what you make it. people are turned off by you bc of the negative vibes you probably give off. think optimistically. if your family is such a problem, move out. surround yourself with people/things/themes that make you happy. there's always an alternative to the choices we make.
     
  7. Smutty

    Smutty OT Supporter

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    You gotta try to get laid man. It doesn't just happen.
     
  8. Swedish Boost

    Swedish Boost New Member

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  9. Xtreme2k2

    Xtreme2k2 GTI Crew ಠ_ಠ OT Supporter

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    You make life what you want. Until you realize this, you will continue to be miserable.

    Believe me, I used to be miserable, not so much anymore.
     
  10. Speed_Demon1965

    Speed_Demon1965 New Member

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    familyguy, I'm starting to feel less and less sorry for you every thread you start in the Asylum. They are all usually about the same thing and you don't seem to be doing a damn thing about your problems. You just sit around and bitch and whine about it all the time. Obviously posting here in the Asylum isn't helping you any, so maybe you need to try something else.

    We are here for giving you ideas on what to try or do, but we can't change you. You have to do that yourself, and change takes effort. Maybe you need to be a little more open. You act like you have the whole world figured out, but you don't have a fucking clue. You're locked inside your own mind, blinded by the anger that you have against everything in the world.

    WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?

    Figure that out and DO IT. Stop being so angry and close minded.
     
  11. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

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    I agree. OP seems very angry and bitter for no reason really...
     
  12. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    In regards to therapy, thou dost protest too much, methinks. In other words, you object so violently to it that it's quite apparent you're not going into it with an open mind, thereby defeating the whole purpose.

    Slow down. Stop judging yourself and those around you so harshly - everyone has faults, but not everyone recognizes them or knows what to do about them. You can't do anything about the faults of others, other than giving those people your opinion. The only person you can change is you, so keep that in mind.

    All journeys begin with a single step, and yours is no exception. You can't change for the better without understanding why you are where you are in your life now. So, start by getting to know yourself a little better. I bet you'll be surprised at what you find.

    PS- Give therapy another try when you're ready to question those things about yourself which you currently believe are irrefutable and unchangeable.
     
  13. Nanook

    Nanook New Member

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    Quit making excuses and get your shit together. You are the only one that is going to live your life. You are the one who has to make something out of it.
     
  14. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    it's so very difficult to change when your foundation is fucked. Like I said before, I didn't know any better at the time so I learned from my father. He will never change, never did. It is way easier to just sit around and sleep than to go out and change. I've tried being enthusiastic. I've tried going out and mixing with people but no matter how hard I try, it still feels boring and stupid. Yeah, people respond to me better when I am positive and energetic. Even so, I really don't want anything from any of these people. All I really want from a night out is to get laid, and that never happens because I am a little bitch just like faggot father. Therefore, even if I have people responding to me in a good way, I still think it's all very stupid. I just don't care, because at the end of the day I haven't benefited from meeting any of those people. I'll probably never see them again and right off the bat I don't care for them. I just want a girl. One girl, for sex, for emotional connections, for partnership, for fun, for the experience, to be happy with. I don't care about anyone else.
     
  15. Cthalupa

    Cthalupa New Member

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    Stop blaming your father. People can have terrible parents and still turn out fine. You know what he taught you was wrong? Good. Deal with it now.

    All you are doing is placing blame on people, things, and situations. Your positive and outgoing attempts at talking to people are not congruent with how you are truly feeling, so it falls short.

    You have to deal with your own problems on the inside first, before you can start looking externally for things. Everything starts with you.

    Screw your dad. Whatever. He is no longer your problem. Stop hiding behind the excuse of "all I had to look up to was a shit stain" - you obviously know he was a shit stain, and what he did/does is wrong, so you can no longer use him as an excuse. You have enough knowledge to know not to act like that.

    Your biggest problem is everything you do you are expecting to fail. "I just don't care, because at the end of the day, I go home alone" - you are working around the basis of failure.

    You cannot expect to fail and hope to make progress. Work around the expectation of success.
     
  16. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I'm trying man. I've tried going off of OT for a little while since I was getting nothing done but it didn't work. I know my father is a shitty excuse, and the very fact that someone knows this means that they should also be smart enough to not get hung up about it. It is just fascinatingly sad that he will never grow up. He'll always be a 1-dimensional die hard Bill O-Rielly figurehead. It's amazing how most people are completely oblivious to the fact that they are extremely lucky to be alive. You could have never been born, never got a chance to experience consciousness, never throughout eternity.
     
  17. Takitome

    Takitome New Member

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    It's amazing how many people think of what if scenarios. Completly oblivious to the matter that it does not mean shit or change anything, no matter how much thinking of it you do. Thinking too much wont do you any good. You tell yourself the same bullshit over and over untill it gets some meaning to you.

    This is what I see
    You know any reasoning, advise, explaination or sympathy given to you will just make it worse for you. If there is one thing you dont need it is someone holding your hand and guiding you. You need independence. You need the hard and cold truth slapped in your face. To wake up and get yourself in gear.
     
  18. Liddy

    Liddy Not enough cowbell.

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    Why don't you start taking your own advice? Look how lucky you are, you have a chance to do great things. Don't waste it on hating yourself and your situation.

    Why don't you start by doing something that makes someone else feel better? Volunteer at a homeless shelter or a school and try to vaule your contribution to the world that you were so lucky to be born into. Experience the minor joys that can come to you on a daily basis because of your actions.

    Your life is your own and how you live it largely comes down to the choices you make.
     
  19. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

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    good post
     
  20. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    You are so judgemental of other people. Remember, when you're pointing 1 finger at someone else, there are 3 more pointing back at you....and that is where the problem really lies.

    You know....most people may be as ignorant as you say but I don't buy it. And one thing is for sure, they aren't as unhappy as you seem to be.

    Perhaps ignorance really is bliss.
     
  21. konrad109

    konrad109 New Member

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    Familyguy, you are in a good position to improve yourself because you already know yourself pretty well and some of the reasons for your problems.

    First of all, turn off the TV. Most people aren't nearly as shallow as the people on MTV. These are not real people, they are there to entertain you.

    You need to go out and DO SHIT. Thats right, go out and fucking ride a bike, go buy some groceries, go feed some ducks. Whatever the fuck you wanna do. Just be outside, away from your family, away from television, and experience things. Realize that the majority of things you THINK you know about life are wrong as they were taught to you by an emotionally abusive family that projected all its problems to members within the family.

    Go to a park, and sit on the bench for 3 hours. And just watch people walk by with their dogs. Just learn to relax by yourself among people. Read some books about body language, and fix your own, as its probably pretty negative right now. Eventually you will get comfortable with yourself and start having real interactions with people. Not the shallow bullshit that you get with initial meetings or what you see on TV. Real genuine relationships.

    Whatever you do, just do SOMETHING that can take your mind off all the demons that have grown IN YOUR HEAD. Yes, you did have a fucked up family life, but you don't need to bring those demons with you everywhere you go. I suggest you do go to therapy with a male therapist. He will help you seperate reality from the shit your family life has put in your head and you will feel better, even if it takes 1 year or more.
     

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