I just want to go to the fucking gym. I can't afford any more visits to a real doctor, so I have to shit $150 to try ART that might fix my shoulder. So I decided I would "cut" to lose some fat, then I got an increadibly nasty case of shin splints. Now I don't have anything to do at all for fun. I can run a caloric deficit or even just eat maintenance calories and lose muscle mass in addition to fat, or eat enough to keep the muscle and get fat. i don't really know what to do at this point.