SRS Past relationships have screwed me

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Snagglebreast, Feb 7, 2005.

  1. They were all filled with tons of hurt and letdowns, so I'm still stuck with this guard, that I don't want to be there.


    The past 5 months have been great. I am dating a guy that I've wanted since I was 16. I am very much in love with him. The way he just stares at me while I read, and when I catch him, he aknowledges me and comes to give me a simple kiss; his smile and the way his eyes squint when he does that; How he subconsciencously(sp?) pulls me closer to him while he sleeps, letting me know he really cares, no matter how mad or upset with me he may be in his conscience mind.

    This is all fine and wonderful, I couldn't ask for more. But the problem comes in with me. I can't just give him 100% in fear of being hurt, though I am pretty sure he's not going anywhere, being that he let me know he's ready to buy a ring. When we do argue, I won't argue back. I just ignore him. Lay there or sit there and not say a word, which in turn makes him think I don't care. I don't know what to do, or how to let this invisible guard go, because its all I know. I've been trying so hard to give him all of me, becuase he definately deserves it. I couldn't have asked to be matched with a better person for me. We fit perfectly and I know our relationship could be 10 times more stronger if I could let this guard down.

    So how can I let it down? I hate that these past relationships have fucked me up and I feel like he should be with someone who shows him just as much love as he shows me. :hsd:

    /rant
     
  2. the Rosswog

    the Rosswog OT Supporter

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    its definately natural to protect yourself from being hurt. But you can't let past experiences dictate what happens in current relationships.

    You should look back at what caused that pain in your past do whatever it takes to avoid those situations. Realize that everyone is different and that there are good people in the world that you can trust.
     

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