Outstanding sex

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Fakesnake, Sep 28, 2005.

  1. Fakesnake

    Fakesnake New Member

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    How can my girlfriend and I get back to having outstanding sex as she put it. We have tried new posistions, only to resort back to old tried and true, I will make you cum. We are gonna try new places, floor, desk, closet, chair, etc. Any other suggestions, I've noticed also foreplay has decreased, and we jump into sex faster. I think we need more foreplay. Please help me out, I want my girlfriend to say we have outstanding sex again.
     
  2. Evil Unicorn

    Evil Unicorn Lurk but Don't Touch

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    You have to be comfortable with eachother.
    Talk about things. Find out what she likes, what turns her on. What you like and what turns you on. Maybe she needs a spanking if she's been bad. Or maybe you do.:naughty:

    :dunno: my $.02
     
  3. purplebeast

    purplebeast The depths of hell and endless torture await all h

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    1st off. Consider your self lucky by her telling you this. It means she cares about you enough to try and work things out instead of just jumping in bed with someone else.

    Talk to her and see what she wants. If she wants to get back the excitment of being with a new person, well thats kind of out of the question. But since you now trust each other more and love each other. You can comunicate and explore others aspects of sex.

    Have you always had vanilla sex? Talk to her and see if she wants to change that. You may be in for a treat.
     
  4. Fakesnake

    Fakesnake New Member

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    Well we are 6 months into a relationship and she is already deciding on what to name out kids, mainly a girl. So I think im gonna be around for awhile. What do you mean by vanilla sex? I threw the idea out of tieing her up maybe. She won't take it IDB, but maybe in time. I have some new posistions in my head I want to try out. I will work on what turns her on more. Find out what makes her tick. She occasionally like dirty talk and the occasional spanking.
     
  5. purplebeast

    purplebeast The depths of hell and endless torture await all h

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    Vanilla sex is plain sex. And I dont think 6 months into a relationship is long enough to get bored. My guess is that she wants to try some freaky shit. And telling you that she wants to have great sex again may be her way of telling you to start suggesting freaky stuff.

    I've found that most girls are rather shy about stuff like that. Mainly because they dont wanna come across as sluts. But if YOU are the one that brings it up and "convince" her of doing it. Then perhaps she wont feel slutty.

    I had amazing teachers for understanding females. My mom got married very young (15) and got divorced at 25. So when it was her time to be wild, I was an 11yr old kid. I went everywhere with her and her friends. I was kind of like the team mascot or something. I would sit there and lsiten to them have girl talks well into the next day. And one of the most valuable things I learned is that most of our ideas when it comes to relationship interaction. Arent really our ideas. Girls have a very subtle way to make us do what they want and make it seem like it was our iniciative. I can persoannly spot shit like that a mile away, its just that most of the time I'll play along to make them happy.
     
  6. rkf76

    rkf76 New Member

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    put your balls in her ass while you're dick's in her pussy;)
     
  7. Fakesnake

    Fakesnake New Member

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    well her being away from me should help a little. I will see her in two weeks. we had a good conversation about we need to do again. it doesn't help she is almost 19 and has very little sex drive. if she had more, it might be better.
     
  8. Ivy Mike

    Ivy Mike New Member

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    blindfolds man.

    blindfold both of you and start at opposite corners of the room. Search each other out by touch. Touch each other without your eyes.
    It is very erotic. Go down on her with the blindfold on. Discover her without your sense of sight.
    You will intensify your sense of touch and by trying to learn more from it, you will learn more about your partner and she will definitely respond.
     
  9. Dax420

    Dax420 Guest

    Kama sutra FTW?
     
  10. BTA

    BTA New Member

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    Shit, our bedroom is so damn dark at night with the lights off (only one window) that you dont need the blindfolds.

    We've been doin this for a long time now then I guess.
     
  11. danison

    danison The Contrarian

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    You need to build up a lot of anticipation in a woman if you want to get her really hot. Do think like smell her neck for a few minutes, then kiss her neck a little then stop completely and go back to sniffing her neck, then go back to kissing. Then when you start touching her don't just go for the places you want to touch. Youch her everywhere lightly. Then stop and kiss her lightly on her neck or on the lips. Then start back up with the touching again. The idea is to keep doing things that she likes, then stopping to build up anticipation, only to continue onto other things that will arouse her. You will know when she is ready when she starts to grind her hips on yours or gives some other sign that will be pretty obvious. Make her wait a little after this and then you can start. DO NOT just start going at it, start slow and shallow and then you need to pay attention to her body responses to see what reallt gets her going. All women are different, some like it hard and fast, others like it slow. Try different things and see how she reacts. Try going in real shallow a few times then in all the way and see how she reacts.

    The thing is, if you want to get her off and make it good for her, you have to be pay attention to what she likes by looking for the signs. Try out different things (not just positions), take control and be committed to doing it right. If you just take the time you will be very very happy.
     
  12. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    all it takes is some imagination and some passion
     
  13. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Different, try something different. Maybe some dirty talk, rope, light spanking, sex in a public place, whatever you think she might find exciting.

    But she has low sex drive hey, then she probably wants to make each time she does have it extra special so you'll need to be coming up with new things often enough. Maybe check FS for some ideas?
     
  14. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    :werd: FS > *
     
  15. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    Be open minded and don't shoot something down before you even give it a chance. Even if it has been something you've done with other people that you didn't like doing before.

    When my ex husband and I started getting physical I asked him what kinds of things he liked... He told me that he didn't like porn because he didn't like watching other people have sex. He didn't like talking although he liked hearing me (wouldn't make noise himself no matter how often I told him I wanted to hear him.) Didn't like dirty talk...AT ALL. I guess to him I was supposed to be sweet and innocent. I don't feel that it makes me not sweet and innocent to like those things. I haven't been with very many people at all, I just know what I like.

    He also said it should be "making love not having sex". So that pretty much put me in a place where I felt I couldn't be open with him. So he told me all these things that he didn't like right up front and nothing about what he did like. All of those things were the things were things that can get me going faster than you could probably flip a light switch.

    Ok... to me making love is a great, beautiful, wonderful thing but sometimes you really just gotta have some crazy SEX!! Don't get me wrong it wasn't like it we had terrible sex or anything but after awhile it just got boring because everything was his way and it was always the same. I didn't feel like I could do the things that I liked or be open and vocal... Half the stuff I wanted he already shot down and all that was left were different positions. Eventually that isn't enough to keep a spark.

    For me when a guy initiates "the freak" inside him and does it out of the blue ...it drives me bonkers. Especially when I can't have what he's talking about right then and there. It also makes me feel like I can be more open with him.

    Try calling her while she's at work, out shopping, anywhere you are not, or send her a text message and give her details about what you want to do to her as you are writing it. Or whisper it in her ear while you are in a movie theater, out with friends or at dinner. Build it up till you get home...or somewhere safe. :mamoru: My last boyfriend used to start telling me all these things right before we got to wherever we were going. He would continue throughout the night and he knew it drove me crazy but it was the most intense relationship I had and I really really miss it.

    I also realized that people tend to have their own talents at something in bed. What I didn't like and didn't feel good at all with one person could be a whole nother world with another person. Just watching her get off could be kinda hawt anyway, right? Don't get in the habit of only doing it just at night. I love waking up to foreplay first thing in the morning. (I like waking up to it in the middle of the night too)

    I know everyone has diffrences on opinions about likes and dislikes. Some of it may not be what she likes but the point is being open minded enough to find out. Don't be afraid to learn and step out of the box. Be spontaneous... not predictable. ;)
     
  16. kai-li

    kai-li New Member

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    Nice responses in this thread I hope something works for you. :)


    On the other side of the coin-- it may not be freaky that she is looking for. Really not all girls have a porn goddess inside of them clawing to get out. (I have no idea about his girl-- just musing outloud). Its very possible that you are just taking each other for granted. Thats why you skip the foreplay and just go straight to sex.

    What are the other facets of your life together? Do you still chat non-stop while you are eating dinner? Do you talk while you are driving? Do you still look at her in the morning with a big grin that says "I'm so lucky to have woken up next to you"?

    It really is possible that you have just fallen in to the natural rut of being together. Every couple goes through it at one stage or another, and it is typical to hit a small one around 6~9 months.

    Focus on the other aspects in your relationship-- try new hobbies, go to a new restaurant rather than the old favourite. If your typical Friday night is just a movie on the couch then go out. You may find that breathing new life into your relationship will only help the sex out.

    Don't get me wrong, it may just be the sex you are having a problem with. But more often than not, sex gets out as a first priority. A good relationship is about more than just sex.
     
  17. Fakesnake

    Fakesnake New Member

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    She goes to school in Socalat the moment. I live up in norcal. It has been working out great so far. We talk at least 2-3 times a day and for good amounts of time. We talk great on the phone but sometimes in person it is quiet. Mainly because I don't know what to talk about. So from what I read, more foreplay, make her wait and check out our relationship and see if it needs some tweaking. I'm a quiet person by nature, once I get on the right subject I am hard to shutup. Any suggestions for helping me open up to her. We all ready express our empotions to each other. We just need to talk more maybe.
     
  18. Ivy Mike

    Ivy Mike New Member

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    OK, leave your bedroom. Part of the fun is no longer using your sense of sight. Once you block out your sense of sight, other senses are heightened. Touch, taste, smell all become a little more clear and vivid.

    You take advantage of this to explore each other a little more.
     

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