OT: quick....I need some ethug.txts....

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by GTLifter, Jun 19, 2008.

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  1. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    Durty Durty ATL Niggah
    help a niggah out with some good ones...
     
  2. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

    Joined:
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    It's always been a fantasy of mine to be a sex slave for 2 bears, male and female, pleasing the male when she's tired,
    and vice versa. Slowly sliding my lips up and down his thick shaft,
    tasting his pre-cum on my tongue. Once he's had enough of that, he rolls over onto his back, lifting me up as though
    I weighed nothing. Gently placing me on his cock, I guide him in,
    feeling him stretch me wide open. I moan with pleasure, feeling him fill me up. He growls softly, I feel it rumble
    deep in his chest, vibrating all the way down his body and through mine.
    He continues to lift me up and then pull me down. He's doing all the work for me, it feels so good, the warmth of
    the fur, his paws either side of my waist. He is in total control,
    I'm just nothing compared to his vast size and strength, but I have total trust in him, I know he won't hurt me. I
    feel the pace quicken, almost imperceptibly. I slowly stroke myself,
    feeling myself nearing the point of no return coming closer with every stroke. I can hear the growl getting louder
    now; he speeds up even more, forcing me further and further down onto his thick cock.
    If it wasn't for the fact I my body is releasing so many endorphines, I would probably be screaming in agony.
    Except I am panting and whining, just like a bitch, begging her mate to fill her up.
    His claws dig in deeper, the pain, its excsquisite. It sends me over the edge. My head goes back, I let out
    a short grunt, I feel my cock explode, covering his chest fur in my seed. I keep stroking,
    it looks as though I'm trying to rip my cock out. I let out another grunt, another torrent flows forth,
    then another and another. A drop lands on the beasts muzzle. He seems confused for a moment.
    That's what I think. He digs his paws in even harder now and slams me onto his cock, I feel his grumble turn
    into a roar. He's cumming, oh my god. I can feel in, filling me up. It's undescribable.
    He's mating with me, he's claimed me. I feel him slow, his cock still throbbing within me, it seems as though
    there's no more room for his cum. It's dripping out of me, onto his fur. I reach down,
    and then bring my hand up, tasting him. It's more than I ever expected. It's heaven.


    Yesterday night I was standing in line at the movie theater waiting to buy tickets, and I noticed that the girl
    in front of me was wearing really tight jeans.
    Okay it wasn't really a girl it was a guy but damn did his ass look awesome in those jeans.
    I couldn't help myself and I reached into my back pocket to feel my own ass imagining it was his,
    I tried to play it off like I was trying to get something out of my pocket but I don't think the girl standing
    next to me bought it because the girl standing next to me was my girlfriend and she could tell.
    Then it was our turn to buy tickets and I noticed that she was gazing into my eyes and drooling. I think when I
    was feeling my own ass it really turned her on,
    but it might have been because she has down syndrome.

    Originally Posted by Patrick Bateman View Post
    I hadnt jacked off in 3 days and felt like I was about to splurge at the sight of a half naked woman. Well later
    that night I thought I was all alone so I took off all my clothes and walked around with my sister's panties
    around my face and another around my cock. I would give myself blue balls just to intensify the orgasm when it
    did happen. Well anyways, I figured why not play the piano naked, shit I was home alone so I thought it was
    kind of sexy that I was naked in the living room with my sister's panties around my head. So anyways, I was
    playing symphony no. 5 by Beethoven, and as I was about to hit the last note, I felt this tickling sensation
    in my anus. I proceeded to squat down on the ground with my finger in my butt - only to find that there was a
    cockroach the size of a penny that had crawled into my anus. So I had shit smeared all over my finger and a
    dead cock roach on my palm that probably died from the foul odor from my anus. I took the roach and caressed
    it against the tip of my penis. I came.


    fuck you, ive raped people for far less than this. you think you can fucking come on OT and just act like a
    fucking hardass and order people around?
    Bad news for you, fuckface, but tonights the night your luck runs out.
    You fucking tell ANYBODY on these forums what to do again, and you're going to find out the hard way what a
    fucking baseball bat to the side of the skull feels like.
    Think I'm fucking kidding? I have your IP, I know who you are, and Im more than willing to settle this argument
    face to fucking face.
    You call yourself "Hooligan"? We'll see who's the hooligan when one of us is lying face down in a pile of their
    own blood, shit, and piss.
    Try and order someone else on here around, and see what fucking happens to you.
    I'm normally a calm guy but when I need to, I'm willing to break some fucking face to get my point across, just
    fucking test me you worthless sack of excrement.

    -----------------------
    Y'all can all shut the fuck up. I'm a DKE and proud of it. I swear to god I went to hell and back to be able to
    call myself a DKE. I went through some shit that y'all could never imagine going through.
    One of our older brothers is a US Navy Seal and just got back from Iraq, he said that he would rather go through
    basic training and he would rather go back and fight for a week before he would come back and go through our
    initiation. Trust me, y'all motherfuckin pussies couldn't handle the shit that goes down for 5 minutes...
    Go on and hate on my fraternity if you want, I don't give a shit, there's nothing I can techinically do about it,
    but I think it's a proven fact that the only reason have for hating on fraternities is that they don't know, or are
    scared to go through what it takes to be apart of it.
    For those of you that don't know, DKE is an active chapter of what is known as the "Skull and Bones" the most secret
    society in the nation. More secret than the CIA, and possibly the NSA. George Bush, jr, and sr, were both Dekes, as
    well as both the Roosevelts, and Gerald Ford. We had 7 of our leading presidents, more than any other fraternity of
    common group ever. We were the leading provider for the Civil war, both north and south, we were the first fraternity
    in the state of Mississippi, as well as Alabama, and Lousiana.
    Y'all don't know shit about what I've been through, and until you come over and go through what I've been through to
    call my brothers brothers then fuck off. I don't give a fuck about anybody on here. So shut the fuck up.
    ---------------------

    you feel like punching me in the face? bring it on you faggot. I know multiple fighting styles, and I also carry a
    switchblade with me at all times. Something fucking tells me that you'd be better off keeping your arms down at your
    sides. If you can't fucking put "cause" and "effect" together in that pathetic brain of yours, I'll help you out
    here. You'll be standing face to face with me, and let me fucking tell you, it'll already be too fucking late to
    back down at that point. You might decide "well shit, I might as well stay true to my word and throw a fucking
    punch". This is where you will go wrong. I hope you don't have a job that requires two fucking hands, because you're
    going to be missing one after I'm done with you. I'll casually divert your fist off to the side, as you suddenly
    realize you may have gotten yourself into something you can't back up. You'll try to regroup and pull your arm back,
    but that wont be easy when I jab my spear-pointed Benchmade switchblade straight through the bone in your forearm,
    and proceed to rip your entire fucking forearm and hand off in one quick pull. At this point, you'll probably spend
    2 seconds in shock. I say 2 seconds, because thats the amount of time you'll have before I reverse the knife in my
    hand, and uppercut it straight through your throat. You'll spend your last few seconds gurgling blood, and wondering
    where you went wrong. After that, I'll be forced to take care of any witnesses who happened to be in the wrong place
    at the wrong time. Nothing a few quick choke slams can't fix, followed by a nice gentle slice across the jugular with
    the Benchmade.
    Now, motherfucker, you sure you want to go through with that punch?
    -----------------------


    That's totally not appropriate. I didn't even make that outrageous of a claim, but you definitely disrespected me,
    and the entire scientific community on that one. I don't care if you just know that much about the subject, or you
    are just ignorant to the facts that are in the field that I am an expert on, but come on. Don't bullshit the fact
    that I know more about this than you do. Just come straight and say you don't know what you're talking about, and
    we'll be cool. Seriously? This is fucking bullshit, you shouldn't get so riled up about such trivial things, but if
    you do, you're a fucking faggot. Go home and make love to your fucking real doll. You don't know shit about what
    we're talking about and you need to fucking leave this thread right now. Buy a bullet and rent a gun, because sir,
    you are finished in life.
    -------------------------


    if this is something you think that is funny or if you think this is a hoax, you should be ashamed of yourself.
    i can guarantee if you say that in public, people are going to kick your ass. on top of that, this is the prime
    reason why men are labeled as arrogant jackasses and you are the leading cause of it all,
    so next time you look in a mirror, think how much it would hurt to have your eyes gouge out and your tongue sheared
    off, cause quite frankly, i would do so.
    -------------------------


    Fuck it you know what?
    No more Mr. Nice Guy, I come in your threads and I post so that you think someone gives a damn about your stupid
    worthless so called "life" well this is the end of the fucking line. From now on im gonna make your message board
    life a living hell and you cant do anything about it except burn, and if someone comes to put the fire out ill tear
    them down like a tree limb by limb just like I did you. I almost want you to test me just so I can unleash the beast
    on your sorry ass and be done with you forever so go ahead and give me the green light,faggot.
    ----------------------------


    You don't know who you're fuckin with. I'm a 216 pound black man. I work as a security guard for a professional skater.
    I do carry guns, and I have been trained to use them in the event of an emergency and have been trained where to shoot
    now lets talk about how you look. you look more creepy with a straight face than that picture of me. you're a pussy
    keyboard warrior who took his pic off ever post your pic thread on OT cause everyone thought u looked fuckin scary
    with your big eyes and scarred acne infested face. you never posted your real pic on here again because you are
    sensitive to OTers comments
    face it kid, you lose at life. you're a pussy.
    --------------------------------


    You think this is a joke?
    Yea wishing aids on someones mother is real fucking funny asshole, so funny I forgot to laugh.
    If you want to talk like that to me why dont you come here and say it to my face so that I can answer your insults
    with a swift fist to your nose. Yea you have a lot to say from 432 miles away from me but I bet if my fists were
    in reach of your face you would be like a tv stuck on mute with no volume button. So do yourself a favor and keep
    your mouth shut unless you want to die.
    Next time you think about saying something like that to me I want you to remember one thing
    I know the guy that created google maps and I can locate you in the time it took me to type all of this up. Dont
    want anymore problems? I didnt think so......
    ------------------



    K for your information, asshole, I have seen a lion. And not one of your crap ass queen of the jungle homoerotic
    pussy-cat lions.
    A real lion, with fangs and horns and wings and shit. Don't pull your fucking wierd ass african voodoo hypnosis
    crap on me when you don't even know wtf you're talking about.
    ----------------


    I work in stem cell research; So I am really getting a kick out of most of these replies. Some of you guys are
    very good at making it sound like you know what you are talking about. But trust me.... You don't. I think you just
    want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you don't know what you are talking about. This is how bad info
    gets passed around. If you dont know about the topic....Dont make yourself sound like you do. Cos some OTers believe
    anything they hear.
    -------------------


    you know, you really need to stop rofling at me because that shit is straight disrespecful and me and many other
    people dont appreciate disrespec, some day youre gonna rofl at the wrong badass motherfucker and hes going to teach
    you a lesson you wont forget very soon ok? you might think its funny to laugh at other people but some of us have feelings
    too and you neeed to take into account because if you hurt other people theyre going to hurt you back, prolly with shotguns
    and rokcetlaunchers. what goes around comes around motherfucker
    -------------------------

    Stop spamming you little piece of shit. Nobody wants you here. I hope a pig fucks you in the ass again. I'm tired of
    your inferiority staining this forum. Now get the fuck out of this forum and never come back.
    -------------------



    you really need to be careful how you talk about me on the forum, i dont appreciate it. tone down the disrespect,
    i dont know where you're from but where i am from, we dont tolerate that. dont even reply to this, just keep your
    mouth shut. consider yourself warned.
    -------------------


    you wanna throw down with me 'cause you think you're some big bad wolf on this site just 'caus eyou got what,
    fucking 1171 posts, you fukkin' as? You think that makes you somebody I wouldn't step on and scrape you off the
    bototm fo my fuckin' shoe, you little insignificant ass? I will rape your children until they cry for theyre mommy
    and then I will motherfucking pound your ass into the black hole of oblivion so suck on that and see hwo you like
    it
    ---------------------



    When you come in this fucking thread, you sure as motherfucking shit had better respect me. Actually fuck respect, you
    had better worship the motherfucking ground I walk on, motherfucker. You god damn think I'm just going to sit here and
    let you stomp all over me with your ignorance and disrespect? FUCK YOU dude, I am not going to be passive about this shit.
    You had better pray to fucking christ I don't find out where you live, or you might find out what a 12 gauge to the face
    feels like, you fucking bitch.
    stay out of my threads, understand? i don't want to take this to fazle, but if you pull these shananigans again he will be
    contacted. mark my word.
    ------------------------


    ok. if thats how you want it to be, your choice. do you honestly think i cant bribe fazle for your ip adress? everyone has
    a price. im on 2 grams of test a week and a gram of tren. do this a couple months back, ok, i mightve let it slide, now,
    someone so much as looks at me the wrong way an theres gonna be probs, lucky for me they always back the fuck down so i dont
    gotta get my hands dirty. i know youll try the same when shit hits the fan but dont think ill be so linient, cause i wont.
    dont say i didnt warn you.
    -------------------------


    It seems to me like you have a lot of problems with me. If you don't like my registration date, my lack of an av, and my post
    count I would suggest you keep it to yourself because I really don't give a mother fucking rats ass. Got it? I have a problem
    with someone such as yourself with over fourty fucking thousand posts, an admitted OT addict, and aren't you one of those
    faggots who has had marijuana in his avatar? You don't see me making posts about my problems with you so I would suggest
    you give me the same respect. Thanks.
    -------------------



    We both know that you're just another chicken shit faggot who wouldn't have the balls to say that to my face. I'd kick your
    ass just like I do all the other faggots. I'd fucking stomp you. Just be thankful you're on the internet and I don't know
    who you are. You little bitch.
    --------------


    you wanna throw down with me 'cause you think you're some big bad wolf on this site just 'caus eyou got what, fucking 1171
    posts, you fukkin' as? You think that makes you somebody I wouldn't step on and scrape you off the bototm fo my fuckin'
    shoe, you little insignificant ass? I will rape your children until they cry for theyre mommy and then I will motherfucking
    pound your ass into the black hole of oblivion so suck on that and see hwo you like it
    ----------------

    What? WHAT WAS THAT? Sorry I must have misheard, I thought I heard a giant faggot mouthing off at me with something he sure
    as fuck could never back up, but it must have just been my imagination. Because after I imagined hearing that, I proceeded
    to imagine how good it would feel to break that persons fucking spinal cord over my knee. I imagined how my next step is
    usually to rip out one of the persons fucking ribs and jab it straight through their nose into their brain cavity. I
    imagined pulling that rib back out, and then brainfucking that dead faggot through the new massive hole in his face I created.
    But I didn't really hear anything, right? no one would be fucking dumb enough to talk to me like that on here

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    you know, you really need to stop rofling at me because that shit is straight disrespecful and me and many other people
    dont appreciate disrespec, some day youre gonna rofl at the wrong badass motherfucker and hes going to teach you a lesson
    you wont forget very soon ok? you might think its funny to laugh at other people but some of us have feelings too and
    you neeed to take into account because if you hurt other people theyre going to hurt you back, prolly with shotguns and
    rokcetlaunchers. what goes around comes around motherfucker
    ------------------------------------------------------------------
    I don't appreciate the face. That's totally not appropriate. I didn't even make that outrageous of a claim, but you
    definitely disrespected me, and the entire scientific community on that one. I don't care if you just know that much
    about the subject, or you are just ignorant to the facts that are in the field that I am an expert on, but come on.
    Don't bullshit the fact that I know more about this than you do. Just come straight and say you don't know what you're
    talking about, and we'll be cool. Seriously? This is fucking bullshit, you shouldn't get so riled up about such trivial
    things, but if you do, you're a fucking faggot. Go home and make love to your fucking real doll. You don't know shit about
    what we're talking about and you need to fucking leave this thread right now. Buy a bullet and rent a gun, because sir,
    you are finished in life.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    im not fooling.. every bitch i see on here talks, but they dont realize they are talking through a computer. i guarantee
    that more than half of you wouldn't talk to me or others in real life the way you do on here, someone needs to bring this
    up and i figured i might as well do it before someone else does
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    you feel like punching me in the face? bring it on you faggot. I know multiple fighting styles, and I also carry a
    switchblade with me at all times. Something fucking tells me that you'd be better off keeping your arms down at your
    sides. If you can't fucking put "cause" and "effect" together in that pathetic brain of yours, I'll help you out here.
    You'll be standing face to face with me, and let me fucking tell you, it'll already be too fucking late to back down at
    that point. You might decide "well shit, I might as well stay true to my word and throw a fucking punch". This is where
    you will go wrong. I hope you don't have a job that requires two fucking hands, because you're going to be missing one
    after I'm done with you. I'll casually divert your fist off to the side, as you suddenly realize you may have gotten yourself
    into something you can't back up. You'll try to regroup and pull your arm back, but that wont be easy when I jab my spear-pointed
    Benchmade switchblade straight through the bone in your forearm, and proceed to rip your entire fucking forearm and hand off
    in one quick pull. At this point, you'll probably spend 2 seconds in shock. I say 2 seconds, because thats the amount of
    time you'll have before I reverse the knife in my hand, and uppercut it straight through your throat. You'll spend your
    last few seconds gurgling blood, and wondering where you went wrong. After that, I'll be forced to take care of any
    witnesses who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Nothing a few quick choke slams can't fix, followed
    by a nice gentle slice across the jugular with the Benchmade.
    Now, motherfucker, you sure you want to go through with that punch?
    ------------------------------------------------------------------
    you wanna throw down with me 'cause you think you're some big bad wolf on this site just 'caus eyou got what, fucking
    4404 posts, you fukkin' as? You think that makes you somebody I wouldn't step on and scrape you off the bototm fo my
    fuckin' shoe, you little insignificant ass? I will rape your children until they cry for theyre mommy and then I will
    motherfucking pound your ass into the black hole of oblivion so suck on that and see how you like it
    ----------------------------------------------------------------
    shut the fuck up. Do you hear these words that are coming out of my mouth? SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. Don't dare dream of
    speaking to a fucking superior like that. Im perfectly capable of snapping your fucking spine in half, and I'm perfectly
    willing to do it. You fucking faggot, you have no idea what you're getting yourself in to. I'll rip your spine out from
    your fucking throat, and i'll use it as a dildo to assrape your mom with while I make her gag on my fucking cock.
    Then I'll pull your shit-covered spine out from your mothers asshole, and force your father to lick the shit off of
    it while I jizz in his fucking mouth at the same time. I'll make your dad snowball the resulting mouthful of your
    moms shit and my cum, over to your little sister, who i'll force to fucking gargle it while i rape her in the
    asshole and whip her with a belt. All of this will be in front of your spineless, dying body, laying on the floor
    waiting to die. The last fucking thing you'll ever see is me castrating your fucking dad and shoving his dick down
    your throat until you fucking suffocate.
    --------------------------------------------------------------
    What? WHAT WAS THAT? Sorry I must have misheard, I thought I heard a giant faggot mouthing off at me with something he
    sure as fuck could never back up, but it must have just been my imagination. Because after I imagined hearing that, I
    proceeded to imagine how good it would feel to break that persons fucking spinal cord over my knee. I imagined how my
    next step is usually to rip out one of the persons fucking ribs and jab it straight through their nose into their brain
    cavity. I imagined pulling that rib back out, and then brainfucking that dead faggot through the new massive hole in
    his face I created.
    But I didn't really hear anything, right? no one would be fucking dumb enough to talk to me like that on here.

    It seems to me like you have a lot of problems with me. If you don't like my registration date, my lack of an av, and my
    post count I would suggest you keep it to yourself because I really don't give a mother fucking rats ass. Got it?
    I have a problem with someone such as yourself with over fourty fucking thousand posts, an admitted OT addict, and
    aren't you one of those faggots who has had marijuana in his avatar? You don't see me making posts about my problems
    with you so I would suggest you give me the same respect. Thanks.
    --------------------------------------------------------------
    Stop spamming you little piece of shit. Nobody wants you here. I hope a pig fucks you in the ass again. I'm tired of
    your inferiority staining this forum. Now get the fuck out of this forum and never come back.
    --------------------------------------------------------------
    I don't give a fuck how tough you are, how well you can fight, or how many fucking guns you own to protect yourself.
    I'll fucking show up at your house when you aren't at home. I'll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the
    water running, open your fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. I'll
    turn your air conditioning on high and open all the windows. I'll turn your cable box on and order 20 pay per view
    channels at once, and I'll pick up your phone and dial a pay-per-minute sex line in Japan. I'm going to run your utility
    bills up so fucking high that you can't pay them. You're going to start stressing the fuck out, your blood pressure will
    triple, and you'll have a fucking heart attack. You'll go to the hospital for heart operation, and the last thing you'll
    see when you're being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed up like a doctor. When you wake
    up after the operation, you'll be scared for your fucking life, wondering what I did to you while you were being operated
    on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You'll recover fully from your heart surgery.
    And when you walk out the front door of that hospital to go home, I'll run you over with my fucking car out of nowhere
    and kill you.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    where do you work at, the faggot factory?
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    You have a death wish or something man, seriously, you realize what I'd do to your face with one punch? It would sort of
    be like 9/11 only my fist would be the hi-jacked airplane and your face would be one of the towers. Im not going to tell
    you again bro.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer,
    shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and
    told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages
    on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your
    refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you,
    rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one,
    changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them
    on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place
    and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice,
    played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the
    bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher
    and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry
    again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open,
    called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    if this is something you think that is funny or if you think this is a hoax, you should be ashamed of yourself. i can
    guarantee if you say that in public, people are going to kick your ass. on top of that, this is the prime reason why
    men are labeled as arrogant jackasses and you are the leading cause of it all, so next time you look in a mirror, think
    how much it would hurt to have your eyes gouge out and your tongue sheared off, cause quite frankly, i would do so.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    Whoa slow down buddy...you think you can pull a fast one one me? I think you failed to realize that I am a cross breed
    between a black man and a silverblack gorilla. How you ask...well duh douchebag my mom was black and my dad was a gorilla.
    Everything you say and do comes right back to me and if you piss me off I will unleash a ferocity and vehemence on you
    that is unlike any other. Imagine this you're trolling RD making retarded posts when out of no where you hear a lound
    bang on your window. It's me bi0tch! Surprise! My swift appearence will startle you and make you sweat...I leave as
    quick as I arrive. You begin to think everything is ok, that is until you feel an unease in your instestines. See,
    what you didn't know is that I implanted something inside of you. You know those little hot wax mold makers they
    have at the Z00's well us gorrillas hate those. I implanted one in your rectum and every 48 minutes you will shart
    one little silver back gorrilla. It will hurt like fire and burn and the smell of hot wax will make you sick... This
    is to serve as a daily reminder to you...Don't fizuck with me.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    fuck you faggot. you think i don't roll with south central crips? ask your mom, son, she'll tell you how bad i can fuck
    someone up. i've pairalised niggas from the neck down for far less than the shit you be spitting, fucker. i spent time
    in folsom for breaking a dude's face, for throwing signs what he don't know, bitch. i tell my po to fuck off all the time,
    don't think for a sec that i'm not the real deal hard to the core. i'll die before i go back to prison. i don't give a shit
    what you think you know or who your crew is, fuck them and fuck you too. bring it to my face and you'll leave with a screwdriver
    in the side of your head. and while your sitting in icu in a coma, i'll be raping your sisters. payback's a bitch, homes.
    --------------------------------------------------------------
    All of you fucking faggots just think you're bad ass don't you? Fucking keyboard warriors, real fucking class acts, I'm
    very scared of you pussies. Let me tell you something, I came from the streets, I will fucking box your ass down. On
    top of that all I got myself a mother fucking education. YEA that's right, I can hack into your computer get the IP Address
    and find out where you live. So I hope you're prepared for me, money ain't shit to me so I'll just fly wherever you're
    at and not even say one word to you, it'll be a straight ass beating. How you like me now?
     
  3. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    thank you sir
     
  4. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    not all E-thugs but i'm not weeding through them this late at night :o (I'm still in kuwait on deployment)
     
  5. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    30 seconds after you made the thread i hooked you up--not bad i must say
     
  6. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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  7. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    I have a problem.
    I live with a girl. We live in a small 2 bedroom apartment. I kind of like her and she kind of likes me back, there is def. something going on between us. Well, about 2 weeks ago, I couldn't help myself, so i went into her bedroom and masturbated over her sleeping body (she sleeps in this kinky teddy..HAWT) Well, I started doing it every night, then last night, I went into her room like usual and started masturbating only to find out that she was awake! I almost ran out of the room and but she stopped me and said that she knew I had been doing it for the past week! I was really embarassed. I couldn't say anything, until she asked "so are you gonna fucking me instead of FAPPIN' off to me?" I couldn't believe it! I went over and got in bed with her and we fucked most of the night! The next morning, I was awoken by her screaming. She didn't know why I was in her bed. On top of that she thinks I raped her in her sleep! Now she's crying and threatening to call the cops on me!
     
  8. TKEBoss

    TKEBoss Nelson Sexors

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    The bear fantasy always makes me laugh so hard I cry.
     
  9. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    In 1986, Mikele Mebembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.
    On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mikele approached it very carefully.
    He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Mikele worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mikele stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted lou dly, turned, and walked away.. Mikele never forgot that elephant or the event s of that day.
    Twenty years later, Mikele was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mikele and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mikele, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.
    Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mikele couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mikele summoned up his courage, climbed over th e railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mikele's legs
    and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly. Probably wasn't the same elephant.
     
  10. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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  11. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    Guys this is probably the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me. I was at my girlfriends house tonight for dinner, and shortly after i had to go #2. My Gf's brother was in the downstairs bathroom, so i went upstairs to use the master bathroom. I was about to take a dump, and I remembered something my friend told me called AC Slatering.
    AC Slatering is when you take a dump facing backwards on the toilet, just how on saved by the bell AC Slater always sat backwards on a chair. So when I was taking a dump, My stomach was facing the back of the toilet, and my back was facing the door. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and began to get nervous. Since AC Slatering is a tough position to get into, it requires taking off your pants. So there I am sitting in my GF's parents bathroom taking a dump with my pants off and facing the wrong way on the toilet. My dump was about halfway out when the footsteps became closer. I then turned around to see that I had not locked the door. Trying to finish as quickly as I could, I began pushing harder and harder. Suddenly, the door opened, and my gf's mom stood there in shock staring at me. We made eye contact for a split second, and I was so embarrassed I wanted to die. I quickly finished up, got dressed, and ran out of the house as quickly as I could. I am expecting my gf to break up with me tomorrow. I am so embarrassed and I hope my gf doesn't blabber about this, Ill die if anyone else finds out.
     
  12. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    thats a good one...
     
  13. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    The other day I was walking down the road when I saw this little kid skipping rocks out into the lake. I started thinking about those poor rocks. One moments they're sitting there in the sun, all warm and rocky, then the next they're flying through the air and then suddenly sinking into the cold, dark, depths of the lake. Before I knew what was happening an intense, burning anger overcame me. I said "hey little kid, how would you like it if I picked you up and tossed you out into the cold lake?" Tears welled up in his little kid eyes and he kind of whimpered back "I'm sorry but I wouldnt like it at all sir". And you know what? I believed him. And it turns out the little shit was right. He cried the whole time he was in the air, but as he sank I bet he was thinking "I'll tell those rocks I'm sorry when I get to the bottom".
     
  14. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.


    Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.


    When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to:


    M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc. Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A.


    along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."


    This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.
     
  15. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    mission was successful
     
  16. grimstone

    grimstone magic murda bag OT Supporter

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  17. PurEvl

    PurEvl going out gassed and not half assed...

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    just search some of my older posts :rofl: Gotta be a few hundred
     
  18. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    Anyone have the poz story that goes 'the 11th day of the month has always been lucky for me. today was no exception...?'
     
  19. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    that was my next avenue but this thread delivered with the epic quickness
     
  20. Formz

    Formz Hipster Santa OT Supporter

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    Said about you GT :bowrofl:
     
  21. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    yea that was pretty fucking epic...unfortunatly the thread was locked before I could return the thuggery...
     
  22. TomDlgns

    TomDlgns OT Supporter

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  23. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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    sweet bump asshole
     
  24. TomDlgns

    TomDlgns OT Supporter

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    shut the fuck up.
     
  25. MaineSucks

    MaineSucks OT Supporter

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    fuck you faggot. you think i don't roll with south central crips? ask your mom, son, she'll tell you how bad i can fuck someone up. i've pairalised niggas from the neck down for far less than the shit you be spitting, fucker. i spent time in folsom for breaking a dude's face, for throwing signs what he don't know, bitch. i tell my po to fuck off all the time,
    don't think for a sec that i'm not the real deal hard to the core. i'll die before i go back to prison. i don't give a shit
    what you think you know or who your crew is, fuck them and fuck you too. bring it to my face and you'll leave with a screwdriver
    in the side of your head. and while your sitting in icu in a coma, i'll be raping your sisters. payback's a bitch, homes.
     
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