Operation: No Friend Zone *HALP VAG*

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Tetragrammaton, Dec 10, 2007.

  1. Tetragrammaton

    Tetragrammaton New Member

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    Essay inc…


    Background Info (me):


    -No GF for ~ 2 years (isolation due to WoW mostly)
    -Graduated college in May, moved to new city in august (don’t know anyone)
    -Pretty shy, not a drinker (difficult to meet people without a foundation)
    -Low self esteem (poor self body image/overweight)
    -Quit WoW at the end of September, focused on getting in shape, in best physical shape of my life (thanks F&N!)
    -Live in a condo building where she also resides


    Background Info (her):


    -Law school student
    -Just ended long term relationship (month or so ago)
    -Had last final on Friday (been studying almost non-stop), now she has a ton of free time


    Goal: Develop new relationship into something substantial; avoid friend-zone at all costs


    Our “history”


    -2 weeks ago…On a whim I called her up and asked if she wanted to go bowling, she said yes, we went out, had a great time, she mentions she broke up with her BF (she ended the relationship)


    -We begin texting fairly regularly, she brings me coffee, etc.


    -Last weekend she invites me over for some wine, we hang out, then head to a bar to meet her friends (there I get invited to a Christmas party), after we get back to the building (2-3am), we head up to finish the wine bottle…although I consider myself shy, I know how to spot an opportunity to make a move and could not find one for the life of me, she heads back to her unit


    -Later in the week I drop by to return the wine glasses as well as give her a CD I knew she had been searching for, she opens the door, and her “ex-bf” is on the couch…she’s appreciative of the CD, I leave
    -X-Mas party was last night, we show up separately, had a good time at the party, met some new people, I let her know I was leaving, she says she would be “right behind me” and asked if I wanted to watch the game with her today (pats/Steelers I assume), I agree and head back to my place


    -Today: several text messages and 2 calls have gone unanswered (just tried to make contact to see if we were still on for the game or not)

    I’m trying like hell not to get up in my head about this, but it’s fucking hard. I’ve done a reasonable job of keeping it ‘cool’ but seeing the EX on the couch definitely weirded me out; even though she never mentioned it again and he didn’t come with her to the Christmas party.

    Options:


    -Do nothing. Let her establish contact next, avoid coming off as desperate


    -Next time I get in touch with her, ask her out on a real date, try to establish something


    -Stand in the parking lot in front of her unit with a boombox over my head


    My biggest concern is avoiding the friend-zone, I’ve been there one too many times and I’d rather forsake any contact with her than end up there…

    Any advice/criticism/suggestions would be greatly appreciated
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    STOP TRYING.

    /thread


    But seriously, you've put yourself out there and I hate to say it but I sincerely doubt she's truly over her ex, hence why he was on her couch the other night. Stop contacting her and trying to see her, you will only come off more as a friend to her while she's getting over her issues. Be unobtainable and you will become more attractive to her.
     
  3. Tetragrammaton

    Tetragrammaton New Member

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    awesome thanks
     
  4. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    lets get things straight man. dont get to hung up on one vagina here. u started to get in shape, you have a life now that u stopped playing Warcraft all day and you finished school. Let things happen, and don't try to hard. Flirt with her, but also don't stall to long. I believe guys will enter the friend zone if you wait to long to make a move,then the girl will think your shy which also indicates lack of confidence.

    also you missed a key opportunity to fuck her, or make out or whatever. i wil stay low, let her make the initial contact do go out and do something like date, go to the bar etc. no going over her house to play board games and watch tv, unless u play on fucking. I just see you as being to desperate and not believing in yourself. you have fo first fix your self image, and then you wil be good.

    I was in a similar situation myself, dealing with confidence issues etc. I believe everyone will always have some sort of issues,but i have progressed alot since then. I noticed with my increase confidence, girls have noticed greatly and approaches have become easier. When i feel good, good results usually follow. Im able to not worry about outcomes, and go with the flow of the conversation not locking up/acting nervous. Work on yourself first,before making attempts on getting a gf or your going to settle to easy.

    Also you should not have called and text her about the game, your acting like your waiting around for her and have nothing else better to do. you should have don't something else, then if she did call you, said well you didn't contact me so i ended up doing something else, maybe next time. should give me some advance notice cause i stay pretty busy.
     
  5. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    Do you really want to be her rebound guy? Because even if she does get involved with you that's all you will end up being. That's way too soon for someone to think about starting up a new relationship already.
     
  6. Tetragrammaton

    Tetragrammaton New Member

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    good point, guess i'll focus on some of her friends I met
     
  7. quamen

    quamen New Member

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    I think waiting around for 6 months to a year is a long time, and you never may come by another shot to get with this girl. I would switch gears if i were you and approach the situation different. Make sure you are busy, even if you really are not. At this point when you start expressing that your busy, you going here, there or wherever, it might trigger her interest and ask her to join you. Then now it is time to make your intentions clear and see where it goes.

    I can see where viper is going with this waiting around 6 months to a year, but if this girl has any types of good looks or personality, she might be hung
    on someone else.

    Also if you do focus on some of her other friends, and if you really want her, your in for a treat. Most likely she will become jealous, and if you play your cards right, you will be the talk of the evening when the girls go out. Then she will be wondering what she missed or whatever, try to literally get in your parents, and then you will have a war among woman. So if you are going to get with her friend, make sure you do with caution.
     
  8. Doc Love

    Doc Love Guest

    Viper stop telling people to wait around for the friendzone to end, I will not, accept that shit. Tell them instead to get out in that 6 months and develop their personality.
     

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