O bother, creepzorz.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by burtonchild05, Nov 16, 2008.

  1. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    Long story, but I feel like telling it, its kind of funny in a twisted way.

    I was at work, stocking the canned veggies like a pro and my coworker Kadira starts walking towards me with a rather disconcerting grin. Behind her follows a new girl by the name of Amanda, Kadira puts me on the spot and asks me if i can take her home, so i figured what the hell i'll be nice. I get off work me and my friend are walking to our cars and she's with us, but she has changed into this rather showing tank top, midriff and all, in 30 degree weather. Me and my friend were talking of cars and she was relatively quiet, so i figured it'd be a quiet ride. wrong.

    We get into my tin foil box on wheels and the first thing she does is snag my phone and start looking through it. About 30 seconds later she asks if i'd mind if she looked through it, i had to fight every cell in my brain not to be a smart ass, just because thats my default, i just said that it didn't bother me. I hardly use it much. She then takes the liberty to text Kadira from my phone saying she's in my car. From this point i've assumed Kadira was trying to set us up... :nono:. Kadira texts back asking if i'd hit on her yet, she still has the phone, so she gets that bit, and laughs hysterically, i'm rather frightened by this seemingly random outburst and ask what is so comical. She then informs me she took the liberties of performing the aforementioned acts. I let it slide, though at this point i'm a tad bit wierded out.

    She then starts talking, and informs me of her life, she lives with her mother, who cleans hotels, they live here, she goes to school there, she has no siblings and is always bored all she has is this and then she says, once more, that she is going to be really bored that night. I pick up on where she's going and kill it off, or so i thought, by squeezing the fact that i have to study for Calc in the conversation some how. Throughout this whole ordeal she is still mesmerized by my phone and decides to text her mother these words, "mom save". Mind you i discover these texts after, the narration for this is not by me at the point in time of this occurrence mind you, its now, after i've gone through the ordeal, third person omniscient i suppose.

    I drop her off, and figure i've slipped the noose. I said bye and left, having done my good deed for the day i set my sights on home, to keep an appointment with my TI-83. Not 200 feet down the damn road i feel my phone do its little jig (vibrate) and think, "balls". I wait five or so minutes to look at it so i'm clear out of there and because it just sounded like a good idea. I open my phone and my fears were realized, my eyes greeted her asking me to go back to her place, pick her up, go to my place, mind you i'm 18 year old senior in high school, whom, most happily, still lives with his parental units, free shelter :hsd:, and its about 10:30 on a school night.

    I figure i'm good to ignore it, and i hate texting/calling whilst behind the wheel of my tin foil-mobile. So i do, not a minute later i get another one, and this one i can quote because it is still in my phones memory, "Sorry i didnt want 2 ask u in the car cuz i thought that might be rude can u come back". Reading all the abbreviations made my brain sore, i hate those things, and i know i don't capitalize my i's.

    I respond with "Nah i'm trapped for the night my weekdays are pretty lame".

    To which i get, "oh ok would she let u come back here with ur homework 2 my house and we can do it here maybe". I get that, well a very similar reiteration, again not 30 seconds later only she states "and we can do Ur studys" in place of, well you get it. I reply with the exact same message i sent before. By this time i realize she's quick on a key pad because shortly thereafter i get, "Oh dont worry bout it im sorry 4 asking hope u didnt get mad but ill c u at work 2morrow bye :]"

    "No worries, see you at work" was my reply.

    By now i'm rather annoyed at the ordeal but its over and done so i retire to my calc. The night goes by, i tell my friend of my adventures, we laugh, i go to bed and think no more of it... for about 7 hours.

    I love my bed, its comfortable, always the right temperature, i have a nice lamp and a nice pillow with which i like to read nice books. I was asleep in said nice bed until i receive a phone call. I use my phone for an alarm clock, and set it across the room for maximum annoyance in rising from my slumber. So i get up, pissed cause i still have a half-hour of beloved sleep left, look at the caller ID and i see "Amanda". Well shit, why the hell does anyone call anyone this damn early, businesses can't call you until 9, this is annoying. So i ignore it and go back to bed, 10 seconds later my voicemail beep goes off. I tell it to shut up and retire to my dreams for then next 20 minutes.

    I get up, get my head wet, put on some the mandated articles of clothing, wish my mother farewell and get in the car. I'm turning on to some road, an important one i'm sure, as there were many cars all wanting to go to the same damn place apparently and my phone does another jig. I ignore it until i pull into the school parking lot and read "I just left u a vmail asking u if maybe u can pick me up 4 work 2 cux i work at 4 2 so if u get this call me and leave me a vmail thank u so much i appreciateit". Because apparently i'm deaf to my phone going off at 7 in the damn morning. Her voice mail says much the same, its put together the same way, loose grammar, blah blah. I ignore both.

    I get to work and see her standing on express (i work at a grocery store if you haven't gathered that) helping a customer. I walk past without a show, i don't acknowledge her, much like it was before i gave her a ride. She'd been working there a month apparently and i had never seen her, call me blind. By this time i had told my friend Rachel of my encounters with these oddities and she worked that day as well. So i just hung out with her and was pretty much left alone by the other entity. Was i avoiding her? Yes. Was it immature? Probably. But it worked. Amanda, as it turns out, didn't work at all that day. She just came in, which made me wonder why i had to give her a ride, another flag. She got there at 12, not 4, and left at 7.

    After she leaves i'm talking with my manager and she brings Amanda up to me and asked if we had a thing. I denied and told her my story thus far. She laughed and i asked her why she had asked. She said its because Amanda had asked her these words, "Can i stay 'til ten so Evan can take me home." I'm the Evan she speaks of and, being that Evan, was rather perturbed. I had no knowledge of this offer being extended to the speaker. My manager laughs and said that Amanda had come down from clocking out all dressed up, i add "again" and re-explain that part of the story to her.

    By this point a lot of people are kind of wierded out, Danielle, a girl whom i work with, whom is especially daft, decides she has a plan. She will ask this Amanda girl if she likes me, if she says yes, she'll tell her i have a girlfriend of 6 months. If no, she'll say something along the lines of, "OK good, he thought you might, but he as a girl friend." I tell her not to, which later becomes ironic.

    That day passes and the next one follows in its footsteps, as always. I get my full nights sleep in my nice bed, with my nice pillow and am only awakened by my alarm. School is long and lame, senioritis has set in early. I get home, i don't have to worry about work today, so i do my homework, read a little, get my Leopard Gecko, Stripes, his crickets from Petsmart, and finish the day with some mindless violence in the form of Grand Theft Auto IV. I'm playing, enjoying my mock murders, and virtual hi-jacks when my phone goes off, this time it's Rachel. She informs me she is working with my, now named, stalker. I say something sarcastic in retort and the conversation carries for a short while until i get a phone call from Rachel. She informs me that she had just been informed that Amanda had fessed up to liking me and, "wanted to be my girlfriend". I found this, again, perturbing, and told Rachel to handle the situation as she would care to. So she decides to get the information from the horses mouth as asks Amanda directly and she responds as Rachel, and now I had been informed she had. Called it.

    Next day, get the car aligned, clean it, get ready to sell it. After that is said and done my friend and i are now bored. We result to more mindless violence for the sake of nothing in particular. Again, i'm enjoying this drug trafficking violence and again my phone does a jig. Its Amanda asking if i can hang out. Wanting to end it quick and not impart much agony, this is where the irony kicks in, i told her i was with my "girlfriend". I then get a text back reading, "u have a girlfriend? I have a ? Plz be honest r u just saying that cuz someone told u that i like u cux i told kadira that and know alot of ppl know that". I figured i tried just letting it go and dropping huge hints that i was interested, but hell if she wants it straight its hers.

    "I don't have a girl friend i just don't want to go hang out with you or go out with you sorry"

    I haven't heard from her since, i found it rather comical in a twisted way its a long read.

    Cliffs:
    Give girl ride home out of kindness
    Get odd texts
    Wake up to her calling me
    wants me to go from my house to take her to work
    keeps doing odd things
    find out she likes me
    drop hints saying i dont return the favor
    flat out tell her i dont like her and dont want to hang out with her
    haven't heard form her since
     
  2. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    All of the above.
     
  3. nwmrkt

    nwmrkt New Member

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    i can't believe i read all of that. But yes interesting story lol.
     
  4. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    And the purpose is stated in the first sentence, its only a story.
     
  5. Two toys

    Two toys New Member

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    well make sure to update with any further interaction.

    and i'm assuming she isnt attractive or else you'd be all over it.
     
  6. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    bingo bango, and she has a slight lisp, and at the time she had a giant fucking cold sore
     
  7. SkyAce2004

    SkyAce2004 New Member

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    hit it and quit it? was she at least good looking?

    ~edit, just read your reply
     
  8. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    your writing is too annoying and obnoxious to read
     
  9. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    Update, she didn't show to work today.

    edit: another update, she also did this, well not to the same degree, but the beginnings of it to another co-worker
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2008
  10. Buck something?

    Buck something? New Member

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    was she ugly?
     
  11. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    correct
    read above
     
  12. Arkaybee

    Arkaybee New Member

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    I read the whole thing.

    I sounded just like you when I was high school. You try to make yourself sound intelligent by the way you write and the way you organize your sentences. I was the same way. Here are some helpful tips:

    Who != whom
    Capitalize proper nouns
    Learn the proper use of a comma
    Sentence structure. Talking on paper and talking in real life are different.
    If it's a story worth telling, proofread it for our sake.

    She sounds nuts. You should take some ninja pics for the rest of us so we feel your pain :x:
     
  13. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    haha thats exactly what i get written on all my papers, i hate it when its not the way i talk, i dunno why, bothers me. I'll have to change it eventually i suppose, bleh.
     
  14. CHOWBOX

    CHOWBOX OT Supporter

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    Hey do all of us a favor and stop updating this thread if she worked or not. I can see if thing changed, but nobody here cares about her work schedule.

    and for christ sakes stop answering questions with "read above" nobody wants to read through that mumble jumble twice. A yes or a no will suffice
     
  15. 1.8t

    1.8t Member

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    Contrary to everyone above, I found the story rather amusing and worth the read. :)
     
  16. Toxica

    Toxica New Member

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    Welp I enjoyed reading it until I came to this part: "I haven't heard from her since"

    I was hoping she did something more drastic.... like beat your car with a baseball bat because you refused to date her.
     
  17. Dreams2Reality

    Dreams2Reality saywhat

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    I found it quite comical, thanks for the post, ha.
     
  18. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    Jerz, ya dig
    Any tips on warding away psycho bitches?
    Seems like being frank worked.
     
  19. burtonchild05

    burtonchild05 New Member

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    welllll

    i was simply catering to what someone else had asked, but thanks for being a douche!
     
  20. cherise

    cherise New Member

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    my brain hurts
     

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