SRS "Nothing happened so you shouldn't get upset over it" - Her

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Arya Stark, Apr 17, 2008.

  1. Arya Stark

    Arya Stark Resident Celebrity OT Supporter

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    How can anyone believe that...seeing a girl for a while now and found out that her ex slept over at her place on more than one occasion. IN THE SAME BED with her and she claimed nothing happened and she doesn't understand why I'm upset and doesn't want to talk or see her anymore. Too bad too, I really liked her.

    Sorry just a rant and my first asylum post. :hs:
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Glad to hear you've dumped her. Pretty much the only way to make her understand how you felt would have been to say "And how would you feel if I had my ex in the same bed with me?"

    But then again, there wouldn't be any point, because by doing that, she showed your relationship disrespect.

    This is all assuming you were exclusive. If you two hadn't come to an understanding/agreement about being exclusive...well then, she can do whatever she wants.

    Were you two serious, or just casually dating?
     
  3. Arya Stark

    Arya Stark Resident Celebrity OT Supporter

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    We were serious and I was exclusive, I even went as far as stop talking to female friends that she considered a "threat" (I'm a fool). She referred me as her boyfriend to all her friends and family.
     
  4. energie

    energie I like to place an order.. the name? Situation the

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    she tried walking all over you, ask her what she would of done if you had a ex gf sleep over but nothing happened.



    good on you, it sucks that it happened but if you let it slide you minuswhale set up the failboat


    tell her to flip the situation be like if one of my ex's slept over how would you feel? considering we are dating.

    a opposite gender shouldnt be sleeping over in the same bed no matter what.
     
  5. jkiley07

    jkiley07 New Member

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    If nothing happened why would she even bother sleeping with the guy? Load of shit, no excuses.

    Good for you for making the right choice
     
  6. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    You did the right thing. That's a major red flag when a girl is that actively involved with her EX. I wouldn't tolerate it.
     
  7. Redbeard

    Redbeard OT Supporter

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    Dont give in.
     
  8. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    u did the right thing i am sorry things turned out the way they did tho
     
  9. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    Good job dumping her. This is just about the biggest red flag you can get right here.
     
  10. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    Add that to the 'dumpable offences' thread in the Vaginarium.
    If I were to sleep in the same bed with an ex of mine, no matter how meaninless it was I'd expect to be thrown out and cut off from his life.

    The thought of even just sleeping in the same bed with another male no matter how friendly I am with them sets off all kinds of 'bad idea' and 'yuck' lighbulbs in my brain, if she'd cared how you were going to react they would have been going off in her mind too and she would have clicked on to that it wasn't worth it and OH HEY, there's a COUCH. It's not on. I'd have walked away too.
     
  11. Trickypants

    Trickypants OT Supporter

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    A friend of mine dumped a longtime gf of his because she had a guy sleep on her couch and didn't call and tell him.
     
  12. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    There is a difference between talking to friends of the opposite gender and sleeping in the same bed with them.

    When I was dating my wife she would get phone calls from her ex, I would regularly pick up the phone, hear his voice and hand her the phone. I thought nothing of it.
    I mean, I could either trust her or I couldn't. It is a very black and white things with me.

    He didn't call that often (like only 4 times I can remember).

    But what that chick did to the OP is full-on BS.

    Now that she doesn't have the OP to push around maybe she can figure out why he dumped her.
     
  13. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    going out to see friends of the opposite sex is one thing, inviting them into your home for an evening and not telling your SO is another.
     
  14. Arya Stark

    Arya Stark Resident Celebrity OT Supporter

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    I don't know why I'm still feeling emo about this too and it's funny how I found out about too from her 8 year old younger sister who blurted it out while we were playing wii.
     
  15. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    I really feel bad for you, and you did the right thing to shield yourself against this kind of terror, you were in the right, jumping with the ex into the bed while she had you was wrong for her to do, even if nothing happend she should have considered your feelings towards the situation.
     
  16. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Even if nothing happened, do you want a GF who lets her ex sleep over and sleep in her bed?
     
  17. Arya Stark

    Arya Stark Resident Celebrity OT Supporter

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    Of course not, but this kind of betrayal sucks and I just need to stop thinking about it.
     
  18. Wilddog

    Wilddog OT Supporter

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    Im happy you made the right choice and dumped her right away. You handled the situation Rightly
     
  19. sleev

    sleev It's sleep, life, and death It's speed, coke, and

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    it's funny: she questions what the problem is with the whole situation, but conveniently forgot to tell you about it too.
     
  20. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    I slept in the same bed as my ex a few times, when we were visiting mutual friends. It was a king size bed and we were practically falling off our respective sides of it, we were so far apart.

    Assuming the guy broke up with her and not the other way around, then she is almost certainly telling the truth when she says nothing happened.
     
  21. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    she might be telling the truth that nothing happened, but i still wouldnt want that done to me, therefore, i would never do it to him. its disrecpectful to the relationship

    :hug:
     
  22. GanglyGoodness

    GanglyGoodness .

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    :ugh:

    funny how she didn't have the respect to even tell him about it until she was caught...
     
  23. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    and
    :werd:

    The whole issue is becoming more clouded in suspicion that the ex staying over wasn't completely innocent. It may be true that nothing happened and that she kept it from him to avoid confrontation. I don't really believe it but I'm just throwing that out there.

    I don't understand why would you invite an ex over without telling your SO in the first place. I only have one ex-boyfriend I would even think to invite over. we were never more intimate than kissing and better off as friends anyway. I'm happy to be around him socially as a friend which is most definitely what he is and will only ever be, but it is because we have that small amount of history that before i'd ask him if he'd like to come over even during the day I would ask my SO if it was ok with him first! Ex's are ex's for a reason, there's history/baggage and emotional bs surrounding them so i'm really WTF about the idea of inviting one into my house at all let alone sleeping in my bed.:ugh:
     
  24. Arya Stark

    Arya Stark Resident Celebrity OT Supporter

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    It can't be completely innocent when her house has a guest room and she let him stayed with her in her room and bed together. Whatever I'm over it (I think).
     
  25. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You did the right thing.

    DON'T cave and talk to her.
     

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