Not sure quite how to explain this....

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by browneye, Jun 25, 2008.

  1. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    My gf and i have had sex a few times and im unable to cum. I dont know what the problem is, maybe lack of stimulation due to the condom? after ~20 minutes i revert back to a semi because nothing is happening. It sucks because she feels bad because i cant get off :hs:

    any tips ?
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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  3. chambiec1

    chambiec1 New Member

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    I figured I would post here instead of starting a new thread. Sorry for post jacking but:
    I'm not a Vag regular, or even an OT regular... but I also need some help.
    I have read all the stickies on this subject already.
    I am having this same problem. The girl I am with now I lost my virginity to. We have had sex probably 10 times, but I have only gotten off 3 of those times. It is really starting to bother/worry me.
    I guess that I should explain that before I got with the girl I have now, I use to mastubate alot. I'm not sure why, but I would sometimes crank one out 2 times a day or more. I never used lube, always a dry hand/cock. Since we have been dating I havn't masturbated once.(almost 3 weeks)
    Now that I have been sleeping with her, it seems as though my masturbation habits have cause a lack of sensitivity. With a condom, I can't feel shit and just usually go limp, which is embarassing as all hell.
    Since the 3rd time, I have been going bareback. I know the risks, but I trust this girl and I know she has only slept with one guy prior to me.

    But me not getting off is really starting to bother me. We have tried different positions and such. Of the 3 times I have gotten off, 2 of them were missionary and 1 was in a sideways position. I am always relaxed when we are doing it, and we are doing it at times when there is no worry of getting caught. Each time we do it she gets off atleast 2 times, and then after that gets to sensative for me to continue.
    Also, if it makes any difference, it seems as though the 3 times I have gotten off were times when there was the possibility of getting caught, maybe that added to the excitement? I mean, when we are doing it, it feels great, and I get close, but alot of the times I just can't seem to get myself over the edge, and she ends up getting sensative.
    I could really use some help/advice. I like this girl alot, and she can't help but think that there is something wrong with her, even though I assure her it is me, and not her causing problems... it's really starting to get to me.

    Sorry for the freakin' book... but I figured I would explain it all in one shot. Feel free to reply here of via PM if you can help/offer advice.
    Thanks.
     
  4. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    That's why I quit using condoms, I couldn't feel a damn thing. Get her on birth control.
     
  5. fray

    fray New Member

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    so when you've cum, were you wearing a condom, or never at all with a condom? Try thinner condoms. What are you using now? Crown skinless is excellent.

    Maybe you shouldn't completely forgo masturbation. 'practice' with lube and change things up a little so you get comfortable cummins in a situation other than just dry masturbation. Also for sex you can try a drop or two of lube inside the condom to increase sensation.
     
  6. chambiec1

    chambiec1 New Member

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    No condom when I got off. Used the pullout method. :hsd: Will try the masturbation with lube out sometime.
    It's just fucking tearing me apart knowing that this is bothering her, and that at the moment I can't fix it. :hs:
     
  7. fray

    fray New Member

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    Not that this will help, but try not to let it get to you. As a female who can't get off (completely different, I know), it bugs me when a big deal is made about not coming. I enjoy it still. My bf knows that occasionally he just isn't going to cum from what we are doing. I'll admit, I used to feel like we hadn't completed the act if he hadn't, but he's explained he still enjoys it, etc. Perhaps you should explain that to her.

    Any trouble getting off from hand jobs (the Vag's favorite! :mamoru:) or blowjobs? If not, why not have sex and then finish with one of those? Or use those or masturbation to get close and then try to finish with sex?

    For all you know, you were nervous and didn't get off the first few times, you guys made a deal about it, and now it's all played up in your mind.
     
  8. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    oh and I just read the rest and yeah performance anxiety will do that. Calm your ass down.
     
  9. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    usually once a day or so, maybe once every other day. She is my first sexual partner. Maybe im just nervous lol?
     
  10. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    ive tried using thinner condoms. she's on birth control but she still wont let me go at it without a condom :hsugh:
     
  11. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yep, just as I thought. Definitely read those threads still, but yeah, you are still new to sex and most likely nervous and psyching yourself out.

    I also would suggest cut down the wanking a little bit.
     
  12. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    She gets super upset at herself when she doesnt get me off. She tried to give me a handjob a few times but i didnt come from those either :sad2: so at this point its just compounding and i think she is just really getting discouraged. She said that she never had this problem before so she doesnt know what to do to help me.

    she isnt willing to give me a blowjob at all :(
     
  13. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    i've actually stopped for the past week to try to help :mamoru:
     
  14. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    err I just realized this was supposed to be directed at the second post and not the OP

    It is your duty as a man to rectify this.
     
  15. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    she absolutely refuses to even consider it. :dunno:
     
  16. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :ugh: Why won't she give you a blowjob? Does she not like to give them or is she discouraged now and afraid it won't help either?
     
  17. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    Oh, and on a side note, she doesnt want to try to orgasm at all and has tried to tell me that cosmo told her that not a lot of women orgasm so why try. that infuriates me to no end.
     
  18. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    she doesnt like to give them and says that they are 'gross'
     
  19. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    Sometimes you have to rough them up a little bit. Girls get silly ideas sometimes and need a man to show them what's what.

    They may seem so at first. But it shouldn't be all about her. Tell her if she ever wants you to eat her pussy she's gonna have to start. In fact I would give her oral first and when she figures out she enjoys it maybe she won't be so selfish.
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2008
  20. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Ugh, get out of that relationship. How old is she?
     
  21. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    im 17, she's 16 :o:o

    i understand this is so 'high school' but whatever :o
     
  22. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    ....another thing she finds to be gross.
     
  23. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    Oh dear. Drug her first? Ummm after that I'm out of ideas. Abort!

    She sounds really self centered, insecure, and naive. Oh wait this is a highschool girl we are talking about. I guess that's pretty normal for them isn't it?

    I still prefer the tried and true backhand method. It's the only thing girls understand sometimes. Just say she fell down some stairs. Walked into the door. Tripped over the vacuum while making you a sandwich!
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2008
  24. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :uh:

    Hope you're wearing a condom. All I'm gonna say.
     
  25. browneye

    browneye Active Member

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    yeah that pretty much sums it up.... should i even waste my time trying to change her views?
     

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