not attracted anymore?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by kilona, Jun 27, 2005.

  1. kilona

    kilona New Member

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    tell me what you think about this. i was in a perfect relationship. totally in love, together for over 2 and a half years, best friends, total comfort, only person i can let everything go with, treats me so well, cares for me more than anything, has everything i could ever want. BUT i am not physically attracted to him anymore. i want to hug and hold him, but not kiss or do anything sexual. out of nowhere i have no desire for that part of the relationship. i want it to be there, but it disappeared. my body just pulls away, i feel like i can't control it. i desperately want it to come back and have been waiting. is it possible??
     
  2. yo vanilla

    yo vanilla New Member

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    well, has his physical appearance changed? have you met someone new? or... was he just on the wrong ladder the whole time and now you've just realized it?
     
  3. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    tell him to go to the gym and get ripped like me :o
     
  4. kilona

    kilona New Member

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    umm no he hasnt changed at all. if anything, for the better. havent met anyone new that is worthwhile. he is very attractive and has a great body (he swims for UF). that's why im so confused.
     
  5. yo vanilla

    yo vanilla New Member

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    then how about the ladder theory? was he on the wrong ladder to begin with?
     
  6. MiseryIndex

    MiseryIndex i never know why. i only know who. Moderator

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    :werd: :o
     
  7. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    Because he's become pussy whipped. Tell him to act more like a man, and you'll be more attracted to him. This is a serious reply.
     
  8. BoypussY

    BoypussY game over.

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    qft. so many times i've seen girls leave their s/o b/c the guy becomes to clingy and doesn't act like the man in the relationship. tell him to shape up or ship out.
     
  9. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    Yea, i've even seen girls cheat on their s/o with someone, and then the other guy becomes clingy. That's when the real fun begins. I guess they get what they deserve.
     
  10. sipherx

    sipherx Jamesl.info

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    I say tell him how you feel, something is wrong in your head. Without any of us really knowing you id say you should leave this guy and let him move on before you guys get anymore closer.
     
  11. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    How is something wrong in her head? She's not attracted to the guy. You can't "want" to be attracted to a guy and it automatically happends. The guy is just acting pussy whipped, i'm telling you.
     
  12. BTA

    BTA New Member

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    You're in college and want to fuck other guys.

    Quit trying to pretend you're a good person and dont understand whats going on.

    You just want to whore it up.
     
  13. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Her mosa? ITS MY MOSA!!!
    Sheesh, I love it when people get all fuckin bitchy on here instead of giving good advice, just reflecting their past experiences and fuck ups.

    Anyways, maybe you should give him a make over. It sounds silly, but take him shopping, get his hair done. Change it up a little bit. 2 1/2 years is a long time, maybe you are just feeling bored. Establish a date night where just the two of you go out, get all dressed up and do something nice.

    If that doesn't work maybe you are just changing and your tastes and preferences and leading you in another direction. If you cant see yourself with him for the rest of your life, and you try to make sublte changes and it doesn't work I would say to get out of it :) It will hurt, but it will be for the best.
     
  14. sipherx

    sipherx Jamesl.info

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    What I meant was, and I wasnt trying to be bitchy, sorry if I came off that way. She needs to leave this guy and not lead him on anymore, thats just gonna hurt both of them more if she keeps doing that. Take these other peoples advice and try it, if that dont work you need to leave him. If you dont (this is what I mean by shes messed up in the head, example: if she keeps staying with him and leading him on).
     
  15. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Her mosa? ITS MY MOSA!!!
    That was directed more towards BTA ;)

    Sometimes fighting for something is good though. It doesn't make sense to just bail the first time you get mixed emotions, where is the strength in that? A lot of people give advice on here to just bail then go out with name calling (bitch/ slut/ etc).. then go on to tell you how immature you are... right. I just dont respect opinions like that and think if they are not going to help they should just lurk.

    Anyways, if this is something she wants to fight for and thinks she could spend the rest of her life with him then change things up, and grow together from this experience. Making the decision to spend the rest of your life with someone is a big one, and it will never be easy. So a lot of thought needs to go into it. It is not an easy desicion such as... "Oh my god the theme music had stopped playing when we skip through the fields of daisys... something must be terribly wrong, I should dump him so I don't hurt him." That is silly, relationships are hard work and after a while you need to fine tune things a little bit. It doesn't mean that a break up is in order at all, it just means it is time to try a little harder :)
     
  16. kilona

    kilona New Member

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    thanks for all the advice everyone. we are and have been broken up actually, so don't worry about me leading him on. i know something is 'wrong in my head' that's just the thing. as dark cloud vbmenu_register("postmenu_38114601", true); said, i want to be attracted to him, but its just something automatic that i cant control. what causes this flip of the switch? i guess the clingy theory kind of works. any other ideas?
     
  17. sipherx

    sipherx Jamesl.info

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    Maybe your just tired of being with someone. I have seen this happen and its usually the women that do this, sometimes women start thinkin about all the time they have lost or spent on this one person when they could have had a better time by themselves and being single.

    I think the college whore thing might be just what ur looking for lol. Just kiddin. You may be just looking for a way out and this your minds way of doing it.
     
  18. AQT4u2NV

    AQT4u2NV Guest

    I used to be like this with my ex, we were better off best friends. We were together 2 years, and apart over a year now...some times I miss him, but I realize that things weren't going to work out.
     
  19. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    Aside from him how is your sexual appetite? Are you getting any? Do you masturbate or have fantasies?

    If so, your view of him as a man may have changed. A way to fix this would be to make yourself feel attracted to his characteristics.

    If not, you may just be losing sexual desires alltogther. This could be due to stress in school/career, or the realization that you want to be more than just someone's wife.
     
  20. kilona

    kilona New Member

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    so looking at some people's responses, if this has happened to them, it hasnt worked out. anyone else have this happen to them? did you ever get the feelings back?
     
  21. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    i'm a hot girl at uf, and i love swimmer boys. i drive stick, you are no match for my awsome gf powers and i will take your boy! :naughty::naughty:

    problem sovled. :x:





    all of a sudden, he's more attractive now, isnt he? just a little healthy competition!:hsd:

    edit: v-muscles...mmmmm :naughty:
     
  22. AstroGirl

    AstroGirl If I don't respond it's because I have severe ADD

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    Prrrrrr... I swam/ played polo all through high school. V-muscles... :drool:
     
  23. uf20wop

    uf20wop OT Supporter

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    i go to uf hang out with me :o
     
  24. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    I can't believe those bastards at UF declined me, I have to miss all the cool meetings. :( Oh well, UCF will just have to do.
     
  25. Chosimba

    Chosimba Active Member

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    did you guys have sex alot when you first started dating or has it always been lukewarm in the bed?

    if you go longer than a week w/o having sex (assuming you see each other and sleep int he same bed often) and he hasn't mentioned anything, then that's not a good thing.

    i'd recommend you spend some time apart from him (not officially, just go visit a friend out of state or something) and see if you miss him and/or want him on your return
     

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