SRS New girl I'm dating has a 3-year-old son, 1 quick question.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by CopenKagan, Apr 3, 2005.

  1. CopenKagan

    CopenKagan OT Supporter

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    I have really been liking this girl, and I think she has really been liking me.

    Anyway, she has a son who is 3 years old. From what I know (although there is still a lot I dont), his biological father is pretty good with him.

    If I get serious with said girl, what is my responsibility with her kid? I would have no problem being a father to him, but at the same time, I don't know how to treat or interact with him if she doesn't want anything like that from me because she wants his real father to raise him, too.
     
  2. CopenKagan

    CopenKagan OT Supporter

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    I guess thats the only one sure way to know. I bet that will be a pretty akward conversation. :hs:
     
  3. Mel

    Mel RIP James :(

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    First, hold off with interacting with the child until you're more sure of your relationship with her. Children get attached really easily, and you don't want to get involved with them, and then all of a sudden you up and leave. It's hard on the kids - I know, my mom was a single mom for a couple of years, and my brother and I got attached to the 2 boyfriends she had before she met my current dad.

    Second, if and when it does get to that stage, sit down and talk to your g/f and find out what she thinks is appropriate. I was dating a guy with 2 little girls. They are absolute terrors. Knowing myself, and knowing him (they were his little angels) I had to end the relationship because I would never be able to not play the mom role with them, because I don't put up with that behaviour, and I know he would have been put out if I played the disciplinarian.

    So wait awhile, see where the relationship takes you, and then find out where your g/f stands. Whether or not the child has another father, if it comes to the point where your relationship is quite serious, the child should respect you, and your g/f should enforce that.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    I think outspoken speaks from experience so i have nothing to add to that exept that as a substitute dad you should love these kids and be in the knowledge that you can never replace their real daddy, but that you really love them and that you try to do humanly best for them as is possible.
     

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