new gf, ex cant get over me

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Mojo, May 5, 2006.

  1. Mojo

    Mojo New Member

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    i dated this girl for 1.5yrs and it went great. but as time went by, so many small issues came up and i didnt want to deal with it (sorry, dont want to get into too much detail). on the side, i wasnt much attracted to her. so i told her how i felt and we agreed to be good friends. but for the past 2-3 months, she is exactly the same as if we were dating when we go hang out. for example: she would get jealous when i talk to other females (friends from school/work).
    fast forward a month, i met another lady and we both have interest for each other...possibily someone that i look forward to be with. however, my ex doesnt know about this and she isnt over me quite yet. she usually calls me or id call her daily, but its been 2 days and no contact from each other. idk if i should call to see whats going on with her or ignore her so i wont build up her depression? i feel horrible for doing this, but i need some advice
     
  2. 127.0.0.1

    127.0.0.1 New Member

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    unless you guys are still friends without benefits, she doesn't need to know.

    if you guys are still fucking, and just not dating, you should tell her and make sure she knows it isn't going to continue.

    of course, you can tell her if you want. you're an adult (i hope so) so be one. adults can have adult conversations with other adults. get it? don't allow her to freak out. if she starts crying, don't give in. if she freaks out, tell her you aren't waiting around with her to see if another relationship with you two happens again.
     
  3. Guardfather

    Guardfather The Paradox

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    loopback's advice is solid
     
  4. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Yeh it's her problem not yours, if you've moved on and she hasn't there isn't much you can do. Don't hide it though, be honest.
     
  5. kdizzle59

    kdizzle59 New Member

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    u could get a show like DR. Phil...i def see the potential
     
  6. foad

    foad New Member

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    :werd:

    Go with this.. She doesn't need to know you're fucking someone else. It's over.
     
  7. kuno

    kuno .... OT Supporter

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    If you're friends with benefits she should know.. otherwise she doesn't need to know your personal life.
     
  8. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    I'd say leave her alone. You don't wanna get sucked into some drama or shit she is dealing with. If she needs you she will call. Otherwise let her learn to be without you.
     
  9. 127.0.0.1

    127.0.0.1 New Member

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    some girls need to be told. if you talk to her every day OUTSIDE of your relationship, she may need to be told a lesson on how not to be jealous
     
  10. notsousual

    notsousual New Member

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    Have you two talked about it at all? About when the other gets a new SO? I told my ex I wanted to know, and he said the same for me. Things have since changed, but that was one of the first things I talked to him about after it was over.

    If you haven't had this conversation, try using your best judgement? Is she fragile, and would have a pretty hard time dealing with it? If thats the case, it probably would be bad to tell her, it seems like she might be happier being ignorant.

    Is she the type that likes to face her problems and just deal with them, no matter how hard or stupid they are? If this is the case, then tell her, because it will help her get her shit in line as fast as she can.

    Another thing you could do is try asking her NOW if she wants to know when you are in a new relationship or if she'd rather be spared the info...and if she says yes she'd like to know, then spill.

    Lastly, if she has asked for you to tell her before, or tells you she would like to know...at least do her the common courtesy of being honest with her. It speaks volumes about you and your character if you are able to do that, and will help her out in the long run too. Good luck.
     

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