SRS neighboor picking on mentally disabled

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by RX8Shinka, Jun 15, 2005.

  1. RX8Shinka

    RX8Shinka New Member

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    About a year ago, we had some new neighboors move in next door. "We" being me and my family which consists of an elderly grandmother, a schizophrenic mother and uncle and an older brother. To be honest with you, we live in a nice house but due to our families current circumstances (my uncle went life threatening surgery) we haven't paid the best attention to our home. Please don't get me wrong, we are by no means "raggies" but our lawn gets mowed once every two weeks and we are lacking a flower bed due to ... well lack of time.... we're too busy running around to the hospital. Anyhow, back to the neighboors- It's a middle aged couple. The man seems very nice and respectful. His wife however, is distant and cold. I didn't mind her cold shoulder- she's like that with all our neighboors not just us. But on Saturday, I was out in my backyard trying to relax when I overheard her cursing like the devil about our home. I came in the house and tried my best to shrug it off. But then over the past few days everytime she goes outside, she stares at our house and makes snide little comments. Granted we are not the Brady Bunch but my family consists of two mentally ill people... and causing trouble for them to make herself feel better is pretty pathetic. So tonight my mother confronted me and told me how this woman tries to intimidate her by staring at her. So I walked around to the side of my house and noticed she was in her kitchen with the window open- I said "I am just looking to see if the women next door is staring at our house again. Doesn't she know it's rude to stare. Too bad some people cannot mind their own buisness."

    Did I do the right thing?
     
  2. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    Tough situation. Having a bad neighbor is particularly difficult because...well, they're right next to your home. It will be really difficult to live under the constant scrutiny of somebody right next to you all the time looking for the slightest thing that's wrong.

    While intimidation techniques are sometimes the only way to deal with some people, I'd first try the good neighbor policy first and try to talk to the husband first. If he's really nice just tell him the situation about the property upkeep situation (keep comments about his wife out of it; no need to get too in depth with the family medical condition either).

    See if he somehow diffuses the angst that's coming from his wife's direction a bit.

    Take the high road.

    If that doesn't work, THEN be tough but fair. Confront the lady...but don't turn it into a mud slinging situation. Let her spout of all her complaints to you, acknowledge that things could be better but there are other family priorities you need to take care of. And then finally make it clear to her you do not appreciate any harrassment of you and your family members...
     
  3. RX8Shinka

    RX8Shinka New Member

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    I appreciate the advice. But please know, she is like this with everyone in the neighboorhood. Contacting her husband? My Grandmother has spoken to him on several occasions about our situation, he seems to understand... but his wife is firm. I don't even think he could get through to her.
     
  4. johan

    johan Active Member

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    There's a saying: high fences make good neighbours.

    I don't think you're going to change this woman's mind. You could try, but frankly, a good fence, some high shrubs and trees and maybe a loud dog.

    Or you could go over and have a chat, but that might just do more harm than good.
     

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