SRS Need to Confess

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Scat, Aug 1, 2005.

  1. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    I just recieved mail from my university, telling me they've withdrawn my acceptance, because my final grades weren't satisfactory.

    I've already told everyone I know I'm going to university next year. I have no idea how I'm going to tell people that in fact I will be going to highschool for another year. I need to tell my parents but I'm too worried about how they will respond.

    My good friend is shallow and will probably cut off contact when he learns I got my acceptance withdrawn. I work in a tutoring place and I may even be let go if the boss feels like I'm a bad example.

    I also need to contact the highschool to re-enroll for another year if that's possible, but I feel paralyzed.

    I just feel overwhelmed, and don't know how to handle it. I personally don't mind doing another year of high-school, it's everyone elses reactions I'm worried about.

    Any help would be great, thank you.
     
  2. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Really. Just how bad were your grades anyway? Did you just quit going to classes right after you got your acceptance letter?

    Your so-called friend...if this "friend" drops you...that is GREAT news. No one needs fake shitty "friends" like that. You can do better. Much better.

    I suggest you call up your high school counsellor IMMEDIATELY and schedule an appointment to talk about this. No, not the psychological kind. I assume your high school had academic advisors or guidance counselors or whatever they call them these days. Talk to this guy immediately. Explain the situation. Find a way out.

    If you don't have such a dude, talk to your favorite teacher. The one who you always felt understood you.

    Do it Monday morning. Asap.
     
  3. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    My final average was 69%. I never stopped going to my classes, but I didn't do any of my final papers. I don't know why... maybe I thought I could slide by.

    My friend also works with me, it would just be a very uncomfortable situation, but I guess there's nothing I can do with that.

    This monday is a long weekend here, but I will contact the Guidance office to get reinstated for classes Tuesday. I don't know how they would handle my emotional situation though.

    Also tomorrow is the first of the month, which means my dad may be getting some billing information from the bank. He may find that the university has sent back the $450 deposit, all before I can take any action.
     
  4. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    you got lazy, and got punished for it

    learn your lesson, you've only lost a year, and dont do it again
     
  5. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    I know thanks, thats really not the help I'm looking for here though.
     
  6. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    My advice is you should try to minimize the damage, if people start asking difficult questions about your university participation you should be something like,maby, dunno, im not sure if uni is that great for me. You can't hold that out forever, and you should be in the Guidance office monday morning before any mail arrives at your dad's desk. That way if an angry dad comes and asks explanation, then you can tell the whole story and that you went to the guidance office today to debate approval of university acceptance(and you will tell them the whole story).

    Now let's analyse your emotional situation here. You clearly cling too much spiritually depending your whole life on school, which brings you in an emotional state of 'hell', by pressure that society has imposed on you. Your grades,your diploma's, the money you posses, the house you own, the position in life, they all mean nothing. The only thing that matters in life is your loving intereaction with other people. Let it all go, it's not that important, it's merely a formality.

    You should understand Scat, people should love you for who you are unconditionally. Why do you let society impose all these things on you? But for now i want you to keep focussed on your future, the only thing that you learn from mistakes is that you shouldn't make them. When Novulea said , 'you got lazy and you got punished for it' you didn't accept that advice, however there's something essential ' you underestimated' that what was needed to get into university, never underestimate school, and when you do something fight fight fight until you win. If you keep on trying and giving everything that you got, then you wil overcome this situation, it's a matter of not giving up, and not letting yourself being put down by the opinions of others. You will have to prepare yourself into breaking thru the wave of critisism. In any case keep believing in yourself. For a winner is nothing more then a person who does just that.
     
  7. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    Don't prejudge the opinion of others. Concentrate on setting your own life on the right path. People are more forgiving then you'd guess.

    I had good friends growing up that took a while to complete school...some even failed miserably and gave up altogether only to end up going back again a decade later to finally get the degree they wanted. I don't think I ever looked down on them at all and I'm extrememly proud they went back and accomplished their goals no matter how long it took them.

    People who care for you want you to succeed. So you've been set back? Fine..... concentrate on how to leap this extra hurdle and you'll be set to tackle life's other hurdles that come by every now and again.
     
  8. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    im sorry, i should have added, face your parents, tell them the truth, make (and execute) plans to correct the failure, then go back in a year
     
  9. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Or even better: during/after your make-up highschool courses, start taking the courses in the first year of your program on a part-time basis to lighten your first year load. See if you can get a Winter semester entry into the program; if not, take more courses part-time. If you take courses through the summers too, you might actually end up ahead of the game by the time you're ready to finish uni.
     
  10. civicmon

    civicmon got all my game from the streets of california.

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    appeal it if you can. That's fairly ridiclous.
     
  11. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    Really? Under what basis can I appeal? I assumed the decision was final.

    teo, I don't think that's actually possible.

    Thank you Darketernal and Toasty for the helpful words. I suppose I do value other people's opinions too much. I guess I'm just hoping my parents will be supportive... they are going to be so upset... I anticipate a lot of yelling.

    I don't really have anyone close to me that I can talk to, I just feel like this will only further alienate me from everyone I know. I mean, I have a twin brother who's going into university, and I just feel like now I'll be seen as the failure son. He's such a shitty brother too, I know he'll only throw it in my face.

    I know logically that I should just look at my own life and try to do the best I can... I'll keep that in mind in the upcoming days.
     
  12. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    Then don't be the "failure son". Be the one that's made some mistakes and will try very hard to correct his own life for the better.
     
  13. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    I pretty much gave up my 2nd half of senior year as well. In fact I left the school before graduation. What I did was attend community college instead of going directly to a 4 year school. But if you really want to go to a university, it's way better to complete high school first because if the CC doesn't offer a class you need to transfer, you could be waiting an extra year or two to finish
     
  14. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Why not? I did it. :dunno:

    Granted, mine was a bit later (college), but I turned what would have been a failed semester in Engineering to a smashing success in Computer Science. I finished in four years with the diploma and I've been successfully employed in my industry of choice for a couple of years now. Besides, there is no "try" only "do". ;)
     
  15. bigman7903

    bigman7903 OT Supporter

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    you could also enroll into post secondary option and take college classes towards your planned major while in school, and whats cool is that the school pays for it (at least they do here in ohio) and this way you'll have your foot in the door once college begins next year
     
  16. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Having a setback, and then using that experience to drive you onwards can result in even greater achievement than someone who did just "ok" and kind of cruised through.

    All depends on what you make of it.

    You could let this setback break you. Or you could become even more determined and smash through the barrier you believe has been set before you.
     
  17. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    :werd: i've experienced a LOT of setbacks in my life. But because of them, I've become a lot wiser than if I'd never experienced them before, and as a result, things that come up that wouldve set me back in the past dont, either because I know how to deal with them, or because I've prepared for just such an event
     
  18. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    Thanks for the good advice guys :)
     
  19. chunkylover53

    chunkylover53 New Member

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    You give up way too easily.

    "Under what basis?" Lies. Lie and don't stop lying. Ethical issues notwithstanding, you have nothing to lose. Make up something about psychological stress, emotionally traumatic events, abuse, etc which caused your grades to fall. And back it up with a doctor's note ... which you can obtain fairly easily with more lying. To quote Peter Griffin, "it's ok to lie to (schools), they're not people like you and me". I would not recommend lying to your parents, however.
     
  20. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Whether this is ethical in your books...is up to you. However, I will tell you that medical excuses are one thing that schools do accept. You need a doctor to supply the excuse though. So think on that for a while...
     
  21. Henry47

    Henry47 New Member

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    I'm great in situations like these. If I were in your sitution, what I would do is just enroll in a community college. I am not sure how things work where you are but I BELIEVE you do not need a high school diploma to get into a community college/junior college. What you can do is hide the fact that you got rejected from family/work, and just tell them that you're going to a community/junior college because you're not ready yet (or some other excuse that fits you) but at the same time enroll in your high school, or better yet, if you don't want to feel like a super senior, try for another high school in the same district, that way you won't feel like a failure.
     
  22. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    this is just a way to avoid taking responsibility and never learning your lesson. Until you be a man and face up to your mistakes and accept the consequences, you'll just keep making the same mistakes
     
  23. Henry47

    Henry47 New Member

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    not necessarily true. Not everyone needs to be punished to be able to learn from their mistakes. He may not need to bear the consequences of humiliation and embarrasment to learn this lesson, just realization of the failure may be enough for most.
     
  24. chunkylover53

    chunkylover53 New Member

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    Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel. In all seriousness, if he feels he needs to 'learn his lesson' and sit out a year of college and possibly not get back in again - then he's welcome to it. Personally, I think he'd just be hurting himself - everybody deserves a second chance. If he messes up again after that, he's a dumbass.

    Dude, you have options. Explore them at the very least.
     
  25. Scat

    Scat King of Cool

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    I don't know if I could ever lie like that, it's tempting but I doubt I could go so far as to get a doctor's note. I was never a good liar. Would I fake the note? Lie to my doctor?

    I don't know the community college situation or even what Henry is suggesting exactly, but unfortunately my high school is closed until August 22 so I can't even enroll yet. Maybe I should contact the school board and see if it's possible to enroll earlier? I don't want to wait until August 22 to take action.

    If I enroll, I could go to another highschool that's actually nearer to me, but I do know a few kids who are doing another year of highschool in my old school. So I don't know which is preferable.

    My parents still don't know about the situation, I don't know if or when my dad will find out about the returned deposit money.
     

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