SRS Need some assitance...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by otama, Feb 22, 2005.

  1. otama

    otama New Member

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    I don't know if this belongs here, but I have received much needed assistance with my personal issues, so I thought I would post this here.

    A friend of mine sent me the following asking if I could help him help figure out what the heck his girl was talking about. Girl #1 is his girl and she told girl #2 that she has an appointment in a few weeks, but neither one of us can figure out what for. Maybe you guys can help out; he's worried that she might be getting an abortion and not tell him about it. I would really hate to see this be the truth and her not tell my buddy about it. And no, my "friend" is not me. I think some of you know that I have my own issues with a certain female.

    Girl #2: I am feeling a little bad today. I'm not sure if it because of the weekend or maybe I am just coming down with something.

    Girl #1: Yeah......but I have a reason for mine.....you know....next week.

    Girl #2 Are you definitely going next week. do i need to take off a day?

    Girl #1: I'm calling today.

    Girl #2: Let me know so I can schedule something.

    Girl #1: It's march 3rd . I just called. it's changed a lot since I went. it's only one day now. It's going to cost me 600...that's not that bad. I need to be there at 7:30 and you need to help sign me in.

    Girl #2: That's good that it is only one day. You should just come home with me that night and stay all night. Then we can just leave from my apartment. I will go ahead and request that day.

    Girl #1: I can't with the dog...it's to hard. You can stay with me.
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    How much does an abortion cost?

    An early pregnancy abortion costs less than an advanced pregnancy abortion. An early pregnancy would fall between 6 to 11 weeks from the first day of the last menstrual period. As the pregnancy advances after 11 weeks the cost increases approximately $100 per week. Early pregnancy abortions can cost anywhere from $350 to 600$ , depending on the city, state, and clinic in which the procedure is performed. A small number of providers offer terminations through 24 weeks. The cost for a late second trimester procedure can cost up to as much as $3,000.

    If the guy wants to save the kid and take care of it, he should call and strongly disagree with the abortion taken place immediatly. He has a father has a 50% saying into this, and should definitly cast his vote on the whole situation.

    *note* that she will probably deny she's going to take an abortion. So make sure that he will be with her on the day of the appointment to make sure that she doesn't go.
     
  3. bottomline

    bottomline Guest

    It definitely sounds like an abortion. It like she will go, pay for some service, and it will be gone. Can't think of anything else. :hs:

    Where did he get those messages, BTW?
     
  4. jotti

    jotti New Member

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    Maybe your friend should ask her? She should be able to trust your friend with something like this. On the other hand if she's taking the initiative to get an abortion and pay for it herself not even tell you about it..
     
  5. otama

    otama New Member

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    I don't know where he got the communication between the two, and I don't think I want to know. But it does look like he read her emails. I don't want to see him hurt like this any longer. I know what it feels like to be lied to, granted it was nothing as major as what it appears to be here.

    I asked him if he has confronted her about it. He told me no, he doesn't want to her to know he knows. He is trying to find out more about everything and if it is an abortion, he is planning on finding out where and meet her there to stop her.
     
  6. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    ^^ That looks like a pretty important piece of information to me. Since she went when - before? Only one day now?? If she has had an abortion in the past, she might be referring to it with this statement.

    Looks like the bottom line here is that your friend's GF isn't communicating honestly. Whether it's an abortion or something else, she should at the very least tell your friend what she's doing, especially since this doesn't sound like a casual checkup. I know that if i was going to a hospital or clinic for any reason, my BF would want to know about it.

    If your friend finds any papers or whatever, look for D&C or "Dilation and Curettage". That's the medical term for an abortion where they need to do light surgery to remove the fetus, as opposed to taking medication.

    good luck...
     
  7. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    if she wants to get rid of it, she'll do everything within her power to do it. another appointment, another clinic. he can't watch her forever. the best thing he can do after finding out conclusively that she's pregnant is to spread the word to her family and other friends, and if necessary, the authorities. pressure from other angles (especially the authorities if everyone else is backing her) will make things significantly more uncomfortable for her to try to brush under the carpet, so to speak. she can be held legally accountable in some places for such drastic actions.

    Oh and for the record, i've never done anything of this sort, although i know a friend who has. i just happen to have family in the medical profession.
     
  8. otama

    otama New Member

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    My buddy has yet to talk to her about it. I keep telling him the longer he waits, the more it's going to eat at him. I feel as though that if he doesn't do anything about it, I will. But then again, it's not my place to get involved, is it?
     
  9. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    It's his place to choose, as ultimately it's his life to live. You can only suggest.
     
  10. quinndiesel

    quinndiesel OT Supporter

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    Spreading rumors to her family and friends is NOT the answer. And what "authorities" is he going to notify? The government has absolutely NO say in the matter. Because of the way procreation is designed, men really have no say in whether women keep a pregnancy. Whether it is terminated artificially through a procedural abortion, or naturally as nearly 50 percent of pregnancies are, once the sperm is donated we are simply along for the ride. My advice to your friend is to only have intercourse with someone who shares his feelings on conception.
     
  11. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    I didn't suggest spreading rumors. Please re-read the part of my post that referred to finding out conclusively whether she's pregnant or not.

    That depends on jurisdiction. In Canada, the Roe vs. Wade precedent is not so cut-and-dried, and fathers can receive temporary injunctions from court to prevent abortion.
    Here's a supporting link:
    http://www.canadiancontent.net/en/jd/go?Url=http://www.totse.com/en/law/high_profile_legal_cases/abt_blck.html

    If he's in the States it'll complicate matters, but precedent has been overturned before and will be overturned in the future. Considering the volatility of the topic in today's society, I'd say law reform - or at the very least, review - will come sooner rather than later.


    If she does turn out to be pregnant, the whole point of spreading the word to her friends and family is to prevent what could be a catastrophic decision on her part. I'm not saying she doesn't have her reasons, but a LOT of women choose to abort and later regret it. Regardless, if a child is created and both parents are in the picture, then both parents should discuss the outcome. If she does not want the child, she could bear it and sign over full custody to the father, who obviously does want the child.
     
  12. otama

    otama New Member

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    Girl #1 is the girl that has the "appointment" later this week. My buddy has yet to confront her. I told him to just suck it up and do it.

    He's thinking about telling her mother about everything. That ought to be good.

    Girl #2: Are you ready for Thursday?

    Girl #1: HECK YA! You have no idea!

    Girl #2: I am still planning on being at your house around 6:30.

    Girl #1: YEAH! what are you going to do when I'm back there?

    Girl #2: I really dont know. I guess I will bring a lot of magazines. I dont know my way around downtown, so I dont think I will leave.

    Girl #1: To bad Jason can't come down to go out to lunch with you....what do you think?

    Girl #2: I may check with him and see. I dont know what I would say you were doing though.

    Girl #1: uhhh...having a female procedure done...he won't want to know if it's a girl thing [​IMG]

    Girl #2: Your right!

    Girl #1: It's a man thing...they dont want to know what goes on down there except when they are involved.
     
  13. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    i didn't understand that last message, but did HE asked her yet or what? he's taking too long.
     
  14. otama

    otama New Member

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    No. He has yet to ask her about it, and it's really starting to get to me. I keep telling him to, but he keeps blowing me off. He tells me that he is going to tell her mother about what is going on and let her handle it. I've been telling him to suck it up and do it himself before it's too late.
     
  15. otama

    otama New Member

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    Apparently he asked her what she was doing Thursday evening and she told him that she has a "work dinner" to tend to.
     
  16. otama

    otama New Member

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    He finally grew a set and confronted her about it. She told him it was "none of his business."

    Whatever happened, happened earlier today.
     

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