My story of the cheating female

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Mitchj, Aug 17, 2009.

  1. Mitchj

    Mitchj OT Supporter

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    I'm not going to do cliffs, but i could use OT advise on this situaition, ive never stumbled accross this subforum but if i posted in the main id get nothing but abuse.

    So i 'dated' this girl briefly, at the end of 2008, only for a month, it was never serious, it ended because she went overseas for two months, when she got back neither of us ever put any proactive effort in to pick it up, so i just left it there and continued to be friends, it really wasnt that big of a deal, i got another gf and moved on. Anyway me and this girl broke up, she got wind of it and put in a rather large amount of effort to get back with me, i figured this seemed to be what she really wanted so i went along with it. We continued 'dating' in what was a secrative way, as in, she told no one and barely anyone actually knew, but we went in public places together, i think it was fairly obvious but for reasons only known to her at the time, she said she didnt want to call it a proper relationship, despite it feeling like one to me, as in, constant activities, constant communication, it seemed like she actually really cared, she would go out of her way to do nice things for me etc etc, i bought up the reason as to why we arn't officially dating maybe 3 times over the course of the three months, it would never turn into a fight, but she kept saying "its not because i want to sleep around, ive just had bad experiences with guys in past" it seemed a bit suss too me at the time, but i really liked the girl and we were having a good time, so stupidly i let it slide.

    Anyway a couple of weeks ago we went to university group event thing, and long story short in which she proceeded to hook up with some random guy infront of me, and ignore me completely the whole night :ugh: The worst thing is, afterwards she comes up to me and asks if we're leaving now (i was the only sober one), so we went out driving with a few other friends, there was obviously something wrong with her, she started crying and shit in the back of the car, and wouldn't say a word. I was like ok... I stayed at hers, try and fight with her about it, but the nice girl is gone and i just get this iritating bitch who wont even speak about the issue. I couldnt sleep, so i got up and got on her computer, her facebook was left logged in. So i decided id go through the private messages, and i found that she was actually doing the same thing to another guy at the time. I know of this guy, but the messages between them, they were clearly having sex, and she was acting pretty much the same was as she does to me in it. Since i was practically living with her and with her every day she must have been pretty sly, im quite a suspicious guy and never got wind of it at all.

    I left the house, my care level shot to 0 after reading that. After that she writes me some long ass message about how she sabotages everyone she cares about blah blah blah, went on for pages, never once said sorry. And every since that she's been trying to act like nothing happened, shes very bitter at me because i dont really want much to do with her and is trying her hardest to lure me back in, i never told her that i went through her facebook, i feel for both of our sake (mutual friends all that) its just easier like that.

    The thing is i still really like the girl., and for some reason deep down im not that mad :ugh: and are glad she is trying to put the effort in, its not that i cant find someone else, i easily could, its just, shes been the one i wanted for the past year... Im finding it hard to drag myself away, but are conciously not responding to her. I dunno, i need someone who actually has experience with this to kick me into line.
     
  2. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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  3. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    sounds like she wants abuse.

    find a girl who wants healthiness.

    that's what i'm supposed to say, i.e., that's what you should do. i know, rationally, that's the right thing to do.

    but the dark side of me would sure find it satisfying if you found some way to flip the script on this girl. :mamoru:
     
  4. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    You're setting yourself up for bitterness, suspicion, and unhappiness if you stay with this girl.

    She's clearly not worth it...she openly disrespects your supposed relationship, and your going through her private stuff.

    Why would you want to stay in a relationship like that?

    And yes, I agree with JJJ, this girl has some stuff to work through.
     
  5. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Honestly, I know the type of relationship you're in and its not worth it.

    Heres why; You're going to have a constant feeling of worry and insecurities. You already know her sly ways and the fact that shes 'playing' between guys like they're all the same just shows shes only looking out for herself.

    Stay in it for the sex, but that'd be it. I wouldnt get emotionally attached anymore, i'd try and slowly pull myself away from the situation if I were you.
     
  6. wolfskymoon

    wolfskymoon Guest

    You are like a dildo to her, but she has lots of them unfortunately. She's like that nice little girl who is a crazy freak when she's by herself. If you like being a dildo then I guess you can keep doing what you are, otherwise you can leave her and move on.
     
  7. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Great analogy bro... :ugh:
     
  8. saosko

    saosko OT Supporter

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    cliffs?
     
  9. wolfskymoon

    wolfskymoon Guest

    :rofl:
     
  10. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    mitch

    this girl is a whore who doesnt respect you or herself.

    ignore her completely, forever.

    live well to get revenge.
     
  11. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Ok, I have to ask because you never explicitly said one way or the other (or I missed it or something), but were you actually having sex with this girl? I know you said "dating," but interestingly enough, here in the Vag, that could mean anything. :rofl: That's just for my own personal curiosity and probably not all that relevent. But hey, curiosity is killing the cat here. :big grin:

    Instead of telling you what you need to do (you already know what you need to do) or telling you what a horrible person she is (you already know that she's a manipulative whore), I'll pitch you a different question...

    What do you think it is about yourself that has attracted such a woman into your life? Why do you think you fell for a girl who is emotionally unavailable (thanks to Lucky Penny for that term :big grin:) to you?

    I think it's more important that you focus on what this situation teaches you about yourself than it is to figure this girl out. The people we attract (and try to retain) in our lives all tell us a little something about ourselves. Figure out what that is, and perhaps you'll be a little less confused.
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    why in the world would you continue to spend time with a girl who "hooked up in front of you with a random guy"?

    when she said "are we leaving?" you shouldnt have replied - because you shouldn't have even been there!

    you should have stormed out (or calmly left) when she hooked up with the guy

    if you don't respect yourself, no one else will either

    someone said it sounds like she wants abuse

    from what i'm seeing, that goes for both of you
     
  13. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    glad to see you are still around yail.. hows life treating you?
     
  14. Mitchj

    Mitchj OT Supporter

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    oh there will be no staying, i am just amazed at the fact she thinks i want to be civil to her, and continues to act like nothing happened.

    yep, oh it would be easy for the sex, but i do agree, i couldnt live with myself if i was even friendly to her from here on in, i really just needed to vent =/

    strong words bro, very true too. She appears to be missing the attention, and getting overly jealous and crazy, i shouldnt really encourage it, but i guess it is the best revenge.

    yes i was having sex with her

    ah im not sure, im not attracted to that aspect of her trust me, im a very open guy and love to tell the world when im with someone worthwhile. I think it was everything else about her personality more so then that... But yes, i do see your point.

    unfortunately, i do university with her, and we actually have heaps of major assessment items as a pair (which i stupidly signed up for before this) for this very reason i shall continue to be civil

    and actually, i didnt storm out, i actually went to hit him. But didnt. I was twice the dudes size there would be no point. Also i really did need somewere to stay, home was a 2 hour drive away...

    But yeah, i guess more then anything i needed to vent that there actually are people like this out there who will lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie some more just to manipulate the good in everyone, i see no reason or purpose too it, i really cant comprehend what motivated her, but i dunno, people like this do exist :hs:
     
  15. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    try to get a new partner. explain to the professor if he/she is cool .. would probably piss her off more.
     
  16. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

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    Call it quits
     
  17. saosko

    saosko OT Supporter

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    You got played.
     
  18. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    none of this has any relation to the content of my post

    why would you hit HIM? he didn't do anything wrong...

    don't you have money for a hotel room?

    i can't comprehend that there are people who will put up with people who lie and lie and lie and lie and lie...
     
  19. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    .
     
  20. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    She sounds like a female narcisist and she's using you, and several other guys she can wrap around her finger.

    Grow some balls and some self respect and move on. Never talk to her again. You can do better than her.
     
  21. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    TBH I actually LIKE getting used..

    I am going to see a chick tomorrow that no doubtedly hasn't gotten any dick in a while and just wants me to come over for that one reason..

    I am MORE than down with that type of behaviour :naughty:
     
  22. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    :rofl: As long as you're aware of it...
     
  23. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    If I was seeing a girl like the TS was stating I would be hooking up with random chicks all the time..

    If I found out she was using me that just opens up a WHOOOOOLE new sexual door that allows ANYTHING to happen..

    I turn these situations into an even better one :dunno:
     
  24. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    her not wanting to call it a relationship was a HUGE red flag.

    she refused to bc in her own fucked up mind it made it ok that she was fucking other guys. hey she was not in a relationship, now was she?


    i cant imagine why you even play w. the idea of staying w. her.
     
  25. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    blow a huge load into her asshole then call it quits after saying something equally mean and equally tramautizing
     

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