SRS My sister is a Heroine addict.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Styk, Jul 13, 2007.

  1. Styk

    Styk Active Member

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    Long story short I ended up with custody of her daughter who is 4. My sister is in a rehab facility and has been there since December. There are a few things that bother me about all of this. It doesnt seem as if they are trying to get her to reconcile with her family. Isnt there a 12 step program with drug addictions like there is for alcohol? She was stealing from the family before she went away and hasnt apologized yet for what she has done but wants to come and stay in our houses for the weekend when she gets a pass. I dont understand how you can hurt your family like that and they assume you can just come on home and not deal with it. After the 8 months or so that she has been there I expected a lot more things to happen than what I have seen. I am really dissapointed and worried about the future of my niece. Whenever anyone tries to call her counselor they arent there and dont call back.. I tried to talk to my sister and she got pissed and hung up on me. With all the sacrifices I have made for her I would expect a little bit of respect from her.
     
  2. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    The 12 step organization is Narcotics Anonymous

    The step about making amends is 9th step...i have been clean 8 years and still haven't formally worked (though i have made most my ammends since)

    8 month treatments seams very, very long. Is it a religious institution? If not, then you can bet that she will be exposed to the 12 steps. They work, and will continue to work, for millions.

    Most treatment centers do have a plan to "reunite" addicts and families, perhaps they haven't gotten to that point yet.
     
  3. gnat

    gnat New Member

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    You might need to put what I see as your petty/hurt ego aside. What she needs is help. It's like you just typed all of that blindly looking past what is going on and focusing on things she's done to you or other people in the family but not her problem. She may never apologize, but she may be alright at the same time. Most people recognize what they've done and work towards making it right with those who matter most.

    Here's a question, would you accept her being clean, getting her life on track as well as going back to the family and working towards a better relationship all the while never actually apologizing?

    I guess what I'm trying to say is don't get wrapped up in your feelings and concentrate on what it is she needs.

    Good luck and have patience.
     
  4. Styk

    Styk Active Member

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    It is not a religious place, although i think that would have been best for her. It is http://www.daytop.com/ Maybe they arent doing enough to guide her along, it seems that they let them sit until their time is up and let them go, kind of like a revolving door. I just dont know what my part is in it, and what i should do.
     
  5. Mischievous

    Mischievous E8 group drawn in 64' by Peter McMullen

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    Tell her NO, simple as that, she hasn't earned the respect necessary to visit, she needs to relearn limits and boundaries, as an addict they didn't exist she needs to know exactly what you expect of her, and never let her slide on a damn thing.

    reconciliation takes time, she'll get there eventually.
     
  6. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    you actually have no part, it doesnt get to be on your terms yet.
     
  7. Deception

    Deception New Member

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    My brother is a recovered heroine addict.....it took him a LONG time to finally get the drugs out of his system.....He relapsed numerous times.....And like your sister, stole from my family....it sucks to never have the meaningful possessions I once had returned to me......My brother never did a 12 step program or anything like that....It just happened one day.....He's been clean for 3 years and he's doing really well.....But I was once in your position where my brother begged to stay with us and constantly apologized to us and we couldn't trust him because we knew he would steal from us.....it took a long time for me to gain his trust back and Im still working on it.... Although you probably know that youre not alone, I figured I'd share my story with you and see if you wanted any help or whatever....
     
  8. Rolledsho

    Rolledsho New Member

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    There are support groups for family members of addicts.

    I think alanon is one of the larger ones.

    You definately have issues because of your sisters behavior and for your own good you need to deal with it.
     
  9. notaniceperson

    notaniceperson -I'm an ASSHOLE!

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    Good luck. My sister died 8 years ago from that shit. Fuckin Baltimore.
     
  10. Eugene Wildwood

    Eugene Wildwood Foxbody for life!

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    Yeah. My dad has AIDS now b/c of that shit. Good luck and be as supportive as you can.
     

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