SRS My roomates hate me

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by nonfinite, Jan 15, 2007.

  1. nonfinite

    nonfinite New Member

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    Alright, so, a little background. I'm a 22 year old male from Wisconsin. I have two roomates, a 21 year old male and a 28 year old male. I have a 24 year old girlfriend. We've been together for around 13 months or so now.

    My roomates, who were probably my two best friends for the last 2 years or so, convinced me to move in with them August of last year. Prior to moving, I had them agree, swear, and otherwise pledge that they'd be cool about not smoking in the house, and that they'd need to recognize that my girlfriend was going to be over. Alot. They said it was cool.

    Four months down the road, we're still living together. The girlfriend is still coming over al the time, which I'm perfectly fine with. She even pays some of the utilities. I've been picking up after my 28 year old roomate for the past third of a year, doing his dishes, going downstairs to his room to get my cd and dvds back from him when he borrows them and leaves them out. I do my best to ensure they not eat too much of my stuff outta the fridge. I leave notes on said fridge to let them know that yes, I am aware they are eating my stuff and no, I am not okay with that. I leave notes asking him to please not leave my cat out on the three season porch, as it's friggin cold out here this time of year. I leave notes asking him to close the door to said three season porch, as both roomies smoke out there. I become tired of this, and sign a new lease with aforementioned girlfriend, planning to move out Feb 1st. There is a clause in my current lease that says I can leave if I give 30 days notice. I give 60.

    21 days before the move, my 28 year old roomate calls me up to ask why I haven't been helping them find a subletter. Earlier on, 21 year old roomate said not to worry about it, and that it wasn't my reponsibility. So I didn't. This enfuriates my 28 year old roomate, who then tells me I'm incredibly selfish, my girlfriend thinks I'm selfish, I'm not working a good program, (we're both in AA,) and that I'm generally fucking up. Despite the fact that this is completely ouyt of the blue, I agree to help him look for a subletter. GF and I start posting ads on craigslist. All is well.

    Today, I take a break from my second of two overnight shifts to come home and get a change of clothes. I go inside and theres my 21 year old roomate on the couch in the living room smoking a cigarette, sitting next to my other roomate. "Not cool." I say to younger roomate. "You're moving," replies roomate. "Not yet though." I counter.

    This sends both roomates off. I'm an asshole, I'm selfish, I'm anal, I falsely accuse them of doing things they don't do such as smoke inside the house, (which they do now.) And why did I arrange to have the power shut off on the 15th if I'm leaving on the 1st? (So they would get it turned on in their name since they leave aforementioned three season porch door open, I don't want the next sky high heating bill in MY name, thank you.) The older of the two roomates is also pissed at me because the ads I posted on craigslist advertise the two rooms that are mine are open, instead of just my bedroom. Apparently I was supposed to telepathically sense that. My bad.


    I have two weeks left with my seriously aggravated roomates before I move.

    What do I do?
     
  2. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    Just deal with it for 2 more weeks and move out.
     
  3. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Pretty much. Just treat them with civility until it's time for you to leave. You could inquire about the possibility of moving some things over to the new place early if you're worried about your stuff.
     
  4. Dodger Blue

    Dodger Blue OT Supporter

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    Just ignore them and stay away from the house as much as you can.
     
  5. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    All things come to pass.

    Tell them "We are going to try to be as peaceful as possible these next two weeks. Let's not take this personal and make things go smoothly, I have a too much shit on my plate for petty arguements. Agreed guys?"

    They will not want shit, you will not want shit.

    Take care of your shit, and move out.
     
  6. unorthadox

    unorthadox New Member

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    another excuse
    I know it sounds lame but take them out for a beer or two with a week left or so. Getting drunk or getting out and (trying to) have some fun can erase alot of tension, with males.

    You made the right decision moving out though.
     
  7. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    I dunno bitching about them smoking when you were moving anyways was kinda dumb. Also it sounds like you are your roomates both live completey different life styles.
     
  8. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    Pretty much keep doing what you've been doing so far for another two weeks.

    Any idea what you'll do with them after you move out?

    Getting them drunk also sounds interesting.
     
  9. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Just do what you have to do to remain civil and then get the hell out of there! No need to deal with other peoples bullshit when you have your life and things of your own to worry about!
     
  10. nonfinite

    nonfinite New Member

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    Well, my issue with smoking, besides the fact that the gf has an allergy to it and that I quit myself just a year ago, is that there was a clause I demanded be put in the lease beforehand that stated there'd be hefty fines for smoking in the house, (not including the porch.) Turns out the landlord and both roomates had all agreed that there wouldn't actually be any fines...it was just put in there to sell [con] me.

    Also, getting them drunk isn't really an option, as two of us are in AA, and the other one is currently relapsing on methodone and other painkillers.

    I get the jist, though.

    Once I get moved out and all set up, they're still getting an invitation to the housewarming party. Hopefully once I distance myself they'll come around.
     
  11. Gregsaidthat

    Gregsaidthat "Individuality is the new conformity"

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    Maybe they will or maybe they wont. Only time will tell...
     
  12. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    Completely unrelated but I truley am glad that you have distanced yourself from all that garbage. Alcohol, marijuana, pills, all of that shit is junk and especially in your situation is completely unnessesary.

    Make sure the one who is relapsing gets immediate help. It hurts far more then it may feel it may help, in the long run.

    Do not take the moving out thing personally. Be strong, confide strongly with your loved one. They are relapsing, so make sure you can be her rock or if you are talking about yourself, tell her and say you need her to be there for you no matter what.

    It should not be like this.
     

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