SRS My mom passed away today

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by katt_85, Nov 4, 2006.

  1. katt_85

    katt_85 OT Supporter

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    :wtc:

    A couple days short of a year ago she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. She had surgery and chemo therapy, but even her doctor admitted not all of it was removed. It came back suddenly, her abdomen distending with as much as five to six litres of fluid. They drained it off of her yesterday and she was supposed to go back today for a blood transfusion.

    She was so weak she couldn't stand. She could barely open her eyes or speak. Her breathing was heavy and labored. We got her to the cancer institute and they made arrangements to get her to a hospital. No one could get an IV into her because her stats were so low. While trying to make her comfortable, I commented that she was feeling hot but her skin was cool and clammy to the touch. The nurse pulled me aside and broke it to me that she was dying.

    They put me in the ambulance while my bf traveled separately to meet us. At the hospital she died moments after my bf burst into the room. The rest of her family was on the way but didnt make it in time. Everyone did everything they could for her; she was well known at both locations. Watching her die was the most heartbreaking thing ever. Comming home without her was even harder.
     
  2. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    When I was in high school my g/f's mom died of lung cancer. My g/f and I were the only ones in the room with her when she died. I can only imagine what you're feeling. Please remember, when people say "she's not in pain any more" or "shes in a better place" they're *trying* to comfort you.

    You and your family are in my thoughts.
     
  3. ChosenGSR

    ChosenGSR Mama always said you'd be the chosen one

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    :hug: sorry.
     
  4. shiyan

    shiyan grabbing titties in amusement parks OT Supporter

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    oh shit :(

    :hug:
     
  5. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    My girlfriends Mother just died last July. It is hard, very hard.
     
  6. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    :hug: My sincere condoleances.

    Take all the time you need to grieve, and find support with your family members and vent in here. I always say imagined if you died would you enjoy your family being in sorrow and tears for many years to come?Of course not you would want them to be happy and live their lives to the fullest, so instead of dying for your loved ones start living for them.
     
  7. Martinj

    Martinj New Member

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    So sorry to hear that!
     
  8. childofbean

    childofbean Green Member

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    I don't know what to say, I just hope that you and your family help each other stay strong through this tough time. :(

    :hug:
     
  9. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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  10. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I'm sorry :hug:
     
  11. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Aww my condolences on your loss. May you find peace and strength in this trying time.
    :hug:
     
  12. TurboKaren512

    TurboKaren512 New Member

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    Im so sorry for your loss. I watched my grandmother die in August, so I understand how you are feeling right now. Its a tough time.

    :hug:
     
  13. katt_85

    katt_85 OT Supporter

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    Thank you to everyone who responded.
    My family and friends are really supportive. I know she would hate to see me sad but it's so hard because she was so kind and I miss her already. Home just doesn't feel the same.
     
  14. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    :hug: Sorry for your loss.
     
  15. pixing

    pixing New Member

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    I'm sorry :hug:
     
  16. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Best advice I ever received during grief was, "You feel what you feel...and that's ok."

    I was feeling guilty because there were times when I didn't feel any sadness at my dad's passing, other times I felt very happy. It's not like I wanted him to die or anything....not at all....but I dunno, something about being around all my family and knowing my dad wasn't in pain anymore was really relieving. I had spent the last 2 years really worried about him....that was now over and I was relieved and happy. However, I felt guilty for being happy.

    It was confusing and it took many years before a psycharist helped me sort it all out. He told me that it was ok to just feel whatever I feel. Try to be respectful to others but there's absolutely nothing wrong with being happy at a funeral or laughing at a wake or any of that. It's just ok.

    It might sound silly to some but that really helped me a lot.
     
  17. SpectraRedZ

    SpectraRedZ New Member

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    So sorry to hear :hug:
     
  18. -Bill

    -Bill Member OT Supporter

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    :hug:

    I just lost My Mom last month. :(

    Nothing can prepare Anybody for this. Just take it a day at a time, each day will get a little better.
     
  19. art vandelay

    art vandelay OT Supporter

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    You and your family are in my thoughts.

    :hug:
     
  20. party_cat

    party_cat New Member

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    MY sympathy's with you!
    May her soul rest in peace!
     
  21. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    Home won't feel the same for some time, but later on things will pick up and new kind of "normality" will set in. The first few months after my dad passed our house had this eerie silence/emptyness, even though he wasn't really a loud/noisy person. Even the family dog kinda tiptoed around the house quietly. Finally after awhile a new routine set in, my mom and I got into a routine (she went to work for the 1st time in her life 6 weeks to the day after we buried him...at age 52) and home started to feel like home again, but it was a new, different home.

    Grief takes you through a whole gamut of emotions....one minute you feel like you'll make it through the day, the next you might come crashing down. As previously mentioned you feel what you feel, and it's ok. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for expessing (or not) emotions they don't feel is appropriate for the moment.

    :hug:
     
  22. The Secretary

    The Secretary My domestic skills will rock your socks off!

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    Wow, just wow.

    :hug:
     
  23. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    My half brother's dad died 3 years ago. We got the call in the middle of the night and had to drive to the hospital to comfort him. This was sudden and unexpected. He had a brain aneurysm. One day he was there, the next he was gone forever. Even though he wasn't my dad, he was still a very wonderful and happy person. I don't know what was harder, being in the hospital room seeing him lying there like that or seeing my older brother sob uncontrollably. It was very tough.

    My thoughts go out to you and your family. Though the pain will never go away you will get used to it over time where the pain isn't so intense. Remember her always.
     
  24. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    She lives on in your mind and in your heart. Cherish your memories. :hug:
     
  25. XPX

    XPX New Member

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    I'm sorry :(
    its always sad to hear such news :sad2:
    :hug:
     

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