SRS My gf told me the other night that when she was 20-21, she was 'experimenting'

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by The Green Bastard, Jan 23, 2007.

  1. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    She said she had a couple 3 ways, FFM and MFM. She never performed on a woman, but had one give her oral. She also said that for weeks after, she felt guilty and dirty, and never did it again. This would be 12-13 years ago. She also said that when she was in the early stages of her marriage, she wasn't happy, and cheated on her hubby, who was a coke-head/pothead/pill-popper.

    And, for some reason, these facts bother me a little. Not enough to even consider ending what we have, but for some reason, it's nagging me in the back of my mind, and I can't place why.

    She's long past that now, and she said she'd never do anything like that to me, but it still nags at me.

    Is it just me being a little overprotective?
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    People make mistakes thats how they learn, and it doesn't sound that she is eager into making those mistakes again, rather its praise worthy that she was honest to you about it.

    Wouldn't drop her like a brick right away.
     
  3. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Oh I'm not dropping her, by any means. She's the first person I've dated that I am entirely 'ME' with. I"m not holding back, giving her the full me, full personality, I've shared facts and stuff about me that NOBODY knows, not even the woman I was engaged to 4 years ago. She's the most awesome person I've ever met, so beautiful, an amazing personality, and she 'loves' to be my tripod sherpa when i'm out photographing stuff. She's just SO amazing.

    And we've all made mistakes, lord knows I've made enough for 2 people. We were drinking and fooling around when this came up, and I told her that sharing everything is part of a meaningful relationship, no matted how 'out there' the facts are.

    I guess maybe I'm a little jealous that I wasn't part of the FFM threesome :o
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    12-13 YEARS AGO! That's the only thing that you should be running through your head, and then getting past it.
     
  5. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    :hs: Thanks for the support. :) I'm still licking some old wounds, I guess.
     
  6. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    It's normal for you to be concerned about her past. Someone's actions are indicative of their personality, even if it was 12-13 years ago.

    I'm not telling you to dump her, but I'd be concerned about this. You now know that your GF's personality is such that she will:
    - marry a druggie
    - cheat
    - "experiment" with no regard for the moral repurcussions. If she felt "guilty" and "dirty" she wouldn't have kept doing it. You also now realize that your gf does not have the forsight to think "hmm, I think being fucked by two guys at the same time (that's what MFM is) will be bad for me."

    Like I said, it's not necessarily worth dumping her over (that's your call), but it changes what you thought you knew about your gf's personality.
     
  7. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    It would me, too. That's why I've never asked my wife about her life before we met. She did what she did, I did what I did, and our lives are an open book since we met. Nothing before matters..................................... but............................. if I somehow found out she did something I think is objectionable or offensive or whatever I know it would stick in my head. Like I said, I'll never ask.

    I don't think you're being overprotective. IMO it's natural. Eventually the feeling will probably go away but there's also nothing wrong with telling her knowing these things sort of bugs you and you'd prefer not to know.
     
  8. Socrates

    Socrates New Member

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    I wouldn't be able to get over the MFM, but that is just me. It was 12-13 years ago, and as long as you can handle her past, and accept that she won't do it again, then you have no problems.
     
  9. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    She means too much to me to let this ruin anything we have. Lord knows I've done stupid shit over the years myself (one night stands, leading a squaw along until I fucked her, then left, etc.)
     
  10. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Her husband wasn't a druggie when they got married. They moved to western canada for work, and about 18 months after getting settled in there, she caught him with a woman snorting lines in their house bathroom. The relationship had a lot of high points, as well as low points, but he got addicted, treated her like shit, then did the roses deal, making her believe he changed. He did that way too often, then they had a baby. And after the baby was born, it went downhill steadily, and she moved back to Nova Scotia with her son, gave the hubby the ultimatum to clean up and move home, or stay out there and she'd send the separation papers out. He came home 3-4 months later, and he was sober.
    He got a job locally, and was doing pretty good, and she thought the original guy was back. Then he became a nasty boozer, missed work drunk, lost his job, and became a miserable prick. Months later, he sobered up from the booze, got another job, only to become addicted to gambling. I shit you not. He kept transferring his addictions from one thing to another. Then one day, he simply up and walked out of her life, and the life of their son. That was a year ago.
    She's easily the best thing that has happened to me in my life, and although i don't believe in god or any religions bullshit, I count my blessings that I was able to find someone as honest, as open, awesome, fun, smart, and sexy as her.
     
  11. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    It was a loooong time ago and she has move on, grown up tremendously, and is now with you. Don't let it bug ya anymore.
     
  12. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    :):bigthumb:
     
  13. qaz0101

    qaz0101 Guest

    I'm thinking that her past bothers her too. However, the fact that she felt comfortable enough to open up to you about such personal matters is a good thing. It signals that she feels a deep connection to you and knows that you won't go running after you hear it. Be gald that she is open and honest with you even if the infromation is a bit disconcerting now. It's for the best.
     
  14. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    whew, thats a tough one to deal with.
     
  15. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    The same thought has crossed my mind since I posted and got some helpful advice. :)
     
  16. razi

    razi New Member

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    Just don't pull a Chasing Amy and say "so... fingercuffs?"

    :p
     
  17. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    her past is what's moulded her into the woman she is today. Everyone makes mistakes, if she's learned her lessons, then you should almost be grateful for her past mistakes

    With regards to her cheating, that would be the biggest concern for me, but if her husband was a druggie, she obviously couldn't have been in that great of a spot in her own life either. If she's gotten past all the shit that she would've been in back then, odds are good that the cheating wont be a recurring theme
     
  18. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    She has said on numerous occasions "How come you were single last year?" And lets me know that I'm the most amazing person she's ever met. (That goes both ways, too) She has promised me that she'd never do anything like that to me, and knowing her heart, her soul, I believe her. She wasn't happy, she was young, etc.
     
  19. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    I agree: that kind of shit would bother anyone, a little. You'll get over it. And you probably shouldn't have asked.
     
  20. MrMakaveli

    MrMakaveli Loyal to the game

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    MFM .. the human shishkabob .. awesome

    Shes bringing all this shit up because she wants to do it again! FHITA!
     
  21. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    I actually didn't ask, she mentioned it when we were drinking and fooling around in bed..afterwards she said she shouldn't have mentioned it and was scared it would change how I felt about her.
     
  22. MrMakaveli

    MrMakaveli Loyal to the game

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    she mentioned it while getting drunk and horny?

    She wants it again .. this confirms my belief.
     
  23. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    :rolleyes: Whatever -- smartass remarks aren't approved of in the asylum.
     
  24. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    I see. Well, you'll get over it in no time. You love her.
     
  25. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    he's a Jan '07, odds are he doesn't know shit
     

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