my gf is scared of giving me head and of having an orgasm

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by durondude, Jan 24, 2006.

  1. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    she's scared of giving me head because she says she's scared she might hurt me... and I understand where she's coming from because we've tried and there is a little teeth action but not enough to where it hurts like hell and she says sorry and stuff... plus she's scared to swallow because she says it's like swallowing her own children...

    Everytime I go down on her she stops me before she climaxes cuz she says it gets too intense for her... I guess it's ok as long as she's not complaining but I feel as though she's missing out... seriously I just want to know that she's enjoying it as much as I am.. I guess I want her to orgasm more then she wants herself to... will this turn out to be a blessing for me? in that I don't have to worry about making her cum? or what should I try? help?
     
  2. low20

    low20 Member

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    how old are you? you sound like a middle schooler...she thinks its like swallowing her own kids? wtf i never heard that one before...if therees teeth action, lt her know about it, and tell her to pucker up and use more lip. and i think once you push her over the edge into an orgasm, she will want it.
     
  3. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    I'm 23 and my girlfriend is 21, we're both first timers so we're both inexperienced.. I'm just asking for some hints or whatnot
     
  4. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    it is most likely getting too intense for HER because you are putting *too* much pressure on the clit - watch for her legs shaking kinda uncomfortably. i usually switch off between lickin the clit under the hood and moving the hood away with sucking on the clit thrown in between all of that
     
  5. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    sorry if my english doesn't sound right because english is not my first language...
     
  6. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    hmm thanks for the advice I will try this, also sometimes she says for me to stop because it's getting too good
     
  7. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    From my experience most people say this because it is getting too good. But that doesnt mean you have to stop. I guess I wouldnt stop if she told me that, if she phsyically moved away thats another story. Lots of people say the damndest things during orgasims and climaxes. The whole point of sex is to orgasim and let the eurphoria run over you. I guess maybe she has other objectives?
     
  8. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    I always try to continue but she will try to move my head upwards with her hands... I guess I'll just ask her to try and resist moving my head away and just enjoy it... she always responds with she's scared cuz she's never experienced that before
     
  9. Solus Emsu

    Solus Emsu ****** U N R A T E D ! ****** -----THAT'S HOW I RO

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    :rofl:

    The whole point of sex is to orgasm?

    If that were the case, no one would have it, especially a good percentage of women. Everyone would just use their hands and vibrators.

    No. Orgasm is not the only point to sex.
    Try these on:

    Connection
    Love
    Reproduction
    Adventure
    Passion
    Exploration

    It's revealing one's lust, physical pleasure, and connection with that body that is in it's most innocent and natural form. If orgasm happens, that is just part of the connection and pleasure you have shared with that person.



    duron dude. Let this evolve. Connect and explore each other and you will learn more and more and eventually you will both be comfortable enough with each other to the point you will both be able to let it all go and just concentrate on enjoying each other.
    Just give it time and keep pluggin.
     
  10. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    best advice evar! thanks:bigthumb:
     
  11. The Secretary

    The Secretary My domestic skills will rock your socks off!

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    The first time I ever had an orgasm I was laying in my bed with my bf. He had never been with a girl before and I had some experience with guys but never had sex and definitatly never had an orgasm. Stupid men but anyway. I was laying flat on the bed he was laying on his side. I had one hand above my head and on underneath him. He had my leg between his legs sort of holding them open so he kinda had me pinned, but thats ok I figured out I like that.

    Another thing that he did that made it great he paid attention to what I like what turns me on, what makes me tick. He gets off more on me being pleasured than himself.

    Back to the mini story. So he took his hand and began to rub my clit and the skin around it. I took the hand that was above my head and grabbed his hand, this made for me made it extremely intimate it mentally gave the stablity factor that he was there for me.

    The mental aspect has to be there as well for her to want to orgasm or else chances are it will not happen.

    I started to shake and moan, I did stop him a few times becuase it did feel extremely too good. But then as I think another person stated I just let go (mental blocks will stop this from happening) and had this great euphoric experience I shook, I held my breath eyes rolled in the back of my head the whole deal. It felt so good too.

    As far as the whole head thing, I love to give my bf head but I still cant swallow. The smell and the taste make me extremely nausceous, so I can feel for her in that instance. But I still love giving him head agian mental inhibitions will prevent her from liking it.

    Best Advice: Talk to her outside of the bedroom when you are not horny like rabbits and find out from her, her likes and dislikes about it. Talk about what makes you tick in the bedroom. Discuss it be adult about it. Be her lover not just her fuckbuddy. I am not saying you are being like this but agian its a mental for her. I would venture to say 90%+ or better that its a mental state for women to orgasm and have great sex. If you dont want to have sex your not going to have great sex, if you dont want to orgasm you wont, if you dont want to give head you wont.
     
  12. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    Thank you, some more great advice... I will definated remember this
     
  13. low20

    low20 Member

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    oh ok, sorry....id say the best bet is to find out what she does like..make sure she even wants to have an O...are you religious or is she? maybe she doesnt want to go that far? if not, i suggest when going down on her to not rush it one bit...work the inner thighs, and everywhere BUT the clit for a while...you gotta get her going real good cuz for some the clit is extremely sensitive and they cant take it unless theyre really really ready...once you go for it, go easy and feel it out to make sure its not too much for her...you can alternate too between clit and fingering her or both at the same time...communicate and find out what works for her, or tell her to try it herself if shes more comfortable that way so she gets to know what she likes and what works...also about the rake (teeth during BJ) id just flat out tell her that shes puttin teeth into it and it hurts...she shouldnt be offended, try telling her when ur not being physical as to not pffend her...tell her its awsome except the teeth, and she will understand...and about the swallowing babies, well i just donno what to say to that...maybe she just doesnt wanna swallow, cuz that excuse is just odd....good luck and have fun exploring
     
  14. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    first, thank you for your honest responses, anyhow, I really don't mind if she swallows or not, I'm willing to tell her before I bust... and like I said i don't mind the teeth cuz it's not hurting me... she's trying that really sexy to me i guess Im the type of guy that gets off to her getting pleasure more then myself... I need to learn some tricks to find her g-spot... there's been times when she's like ohhh right there that feels good... so yeah i pay attention to what she likes... we just need to explore more...

    thanks again everyone
     
  15. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    ya my bad. I'd listen to this guy my answer is far inferior to what he has to offer. I tried :hsd:
     
  16. KungFool7

    KungFool7 keep driving—it's getting earlier

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    HAHAHAHAHAHA
     
  17. YogiBird

    YogiBird New Member

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    Wow!!!(meaning: nothing to add!!):bigthumb:
     
  18. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Here's my take on it:

    The reason why she is making you stop is because it IS too intense. The best thing you can do, in my experience, is to back off every now and again. You have to tease her. You have to make her want more by offering LESS. How do you do this? Simple:

    Go down on her for 5-15 seconds, then move around to other areas. Kiss her stomach, legs, backs of knees, etc. Then come back to her V and work around the area. You don't have to ALWAYS lick her clit, but sometimes. Too much stimulation will be uncomfortable. You have to realize it's like her rubbing you after you've come - it can be too much!

    As far as her g-spot, that's simple. With her laying on her back, your palm up, put your finger in. Then simply go on the roof of her V about 1" or 2" in. That's it. Push back towards yourself, like you are reaching in and pushing a button (kind of like a "come here" movement with your finger), on one second counts. On for 1 second, off for one second, on again, etc. Not too much pressure, of course. Don't just be on/off/on/off all the time, stop for a while then start again later. Mix it up with going down on her.

    So, basically, if she pushes you off, tease her somewhere else, then make her beg for more. Use your finger on her g-spot every now and then.

    And then be sure everything is bolted down...
     
  19. 311-420

    311-420 New Member

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    she might have that sensation to pee like i've heard alot of girls on here are having right before they orgasm.:dunno:
     
  20. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    echo above advice.. i think you're focussing on the clit too much. fingers in the honey pot ftw :)
     
  21. Bona Fide

    Bona Fide Guest

    Amen, brotha. :wavey:
     
  22. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    make sure she is not afraid of peeing. that is a common fear in noobs. tell your you need her to just once try to ride it out. that should be about all it takes.

    if she is really having a hard time, tell her to try to hold her breath when it gets too intense. I have no idea how this works, but the last girl i had who had this same problem told me.

    also agree with the other guys, some girls like it hard and fast and other ones like a gentle flick... keep your mouth full of saliva when you are getting close especially. try touching the clit as light as you can, once she is close she will be so sensitive thats all it takes...
     
  23. King Ralph

    King Ralph Active Member

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    Show her you're not scared to put her in the hospital ;)
     
  24. durondude

    durondude OT Addict

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    Well it's wierd cuz I ask her and she says she likes it fast and hard... if that's the case then I really need to work on my stamina either that or make it so i can't feel much... tops for me now is like 15 minutes before I can't hold it in no longer
     

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