My GF has a problem with my drinking.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by BradUF, Aug 3, 2006.

  1. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    I go out drinking maybe once or twice a week at most with my guy friends, so its not like I am going clubin with girls or something. Last night I went to my friends 21'st birthday at a club. I felt I had to many to make it past the cops staked out all over the place. She lived near by and I thought the right thing to do is call her for a ride. Yes it was late but I thought I would do the same for her and not be mad about it. Well she comes pick me up and she is all pissed off about me drinking. My GF is against drinking. She calls me today and is like you know how it makes me feel when you go into a bar? And there are other things to do besides drink. I keep telling I feel that I have not done nothing wrong and I made a good call by getting a ride instead of risking a DUI. I am fucking 21 year old college student. Dont I have the right to drink? As long as its not a problem, I think a problem would be drinking and driving which is something I dont do.
     
  2. KingOfBabTouma

    KingOfBabTouma Hepinize daha iyiyim OT Supporter

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    edit: wrong forum.....
     
  3. Cthalupa

    Cthalupa New Member

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    Your SO has to accept you for who you are - Trying to change you isn't going to get anything done. You have to want to change yourself.

    Beyond that, it hardly sounds like your drinking is a problem. From what you've said, you're not going out and getting drunk every night. You did the responsible thing and asked for a ride when you felt you were too drunk to drive safely, and it sounds like this is the first time you've asked her to help you out, so it's not even as if you're constantly pestering her about it.

    It was your friend's 21st birthday. You're supposed to go out and get smashed, and party it up. It's a celebration, especially if you're in the US. Finally legally allowed to drink - So everyone there drinks. A lot.

    If you were going down a self destructive path, I can see her talking to you. I can see her complaining. But going out with friends to drink one or two times a week isn't the same as getting blitzed every day, binge drinking at night, and laying around passed out.
     
  4. dk01

    dk01 Awwwwww..... OT Supporter

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    dawt

    You need to just tell her that you respect her not drinking and she needs to allow you to make some choices too. She could come out and share the experience with you, even if she doesn't drink. Maybe she is just a bit scared of the whole experience.
     
  5. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    I always say to her I have no problems with what you do. She just keeps saying over and over Do you know how it makes me feel when you go into a bar? Also she says " I dont want people to think my BF drinks all the time" I If I were to say I dont care when she says it makes her feel bad when I go drinking I would be fucking my self. I refuse to give up on my right to get smashed on a weekend as a 21 year old college student. I just feel is a fucking stupid reason to end a two year relationship. This is not the first time that this has come up and I never give in. I have never told her I would stop drinking. I told her I will always drink and she just gets pissed off and bugs me again when she finds out I am going out. Which I tell her and she makes me wish I dont tell her I am going out and I should just get a DUI so I dont piss her off by asking for a ride when I cant drive. This is the first time too I have ever asked for a ride from her and she was 10 min away from the place.
     
  6. Bedroomeyes202

    Bedroomeyes202 New Member

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    does she have a problem with the drinking or with the fact that you go out without her?
    if it IS the drinking and nothing else- ending a two year relationship sucks, but if you cant compromise- then you wont be able to compromise on other things later in life, as for the fact that she just says "do you know how it make me feel" but doesnt explain HOW it makes her feel- she needs to work on the communication part of things.... might wanna talk to her- NOT in accusing way- like if you dont accept it were over- but try to find out WHY it bothers her (with more of an explanation than CUZ)and go from there
     
  7. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    There's compromise for proper reasons, and then there is giving up something because she asks yet has no logical reason to back it up. Her only reason is that she is against drinking, thus everyone should be. That's a stupid reason and boarders on preaching which is bloody annoying.

    Ending a 2 year relationship would definately suck, but if she is gonna act like this often I don't think I'd hang around.
     
  8. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    That made me laugh for some reason
     
  9. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    I invite her everywhere I go but she said she hates bars so I go with out her. She wont drink her self and she makes all these claims about how I am going to get drunk and do something stupid. She says stupid shit like "What if I come pick you up and you cant control your self?" She treats drinking like it crack, like I am going to fuck every girl I see and jump off a roof. There is no reasoning with her she wont listen. So I guess I am just going to keep going out drinking and let her be pissed off.
     
  10. ~Tangerene~

    ~Tangerene~ New Member

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    She was probably jealous that you were out having a good time and she wasnt...Life is too short for a controlling spouse, my advice is date a girl you can party with and who gives you freedom.
     
  11. Local12hand

    Local12hand New Member

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    Sounds Like You Need To Punch That Bitch In The Face... That Is Bullshit Man...dont Go With Girls That Dont Drink If You Do Cause They Will Try To Get You To Stop And Make You Feel Like Shit Trying To Do So
     
  12. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    /thread
     
  13. Buttons

    Buttons OT Supporter

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    No you are not "supposed" to go out:ugh: , you're expected to go out. I didn't go out for my 19th (canadian) and my friends were pissed. I didnt feel a need to celebrate my birthday like that.
     
  14. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    :werd:

    my ass stayed home on my 21st :o
     
  15. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Talk to her about the issue...does something in her past make her not like the idea of you drinking? Has she had a bad experience with someone dealing with a drinking problem?

    It sounds like there is more to this than her just not liking it.
     
  16. imsleepwalking

    imsleepwalking New Member

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    My advice to you is to live your life doing whatever makes you happy.

    Chicks will always tell you to stop drinking or smoking, etc. The most this bitching will accomplish is getting you to stop drinking for 2 or 3 weeks to make them happy; whereas, you'll be completely miserable. You need to let her know that if you're ever going to quit anything it will have to be on your own time and by your own decision.

    IMO, she should be happy that you're responsible enough to recognize when you've had too much to drink and need a ride home.
     
  17. Mugwump

    Mugwump Guest

    She shouldn't date men who have different lifestyle choices than her own because she's a preacher.

    And she should never shame on someone for acting responsible when they were drunk and calling for a ride.
     
  18. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    You need a new GF. My ex was like that, what a fucking drag. My new woman? Shit, we were drunk Saturday, Sunday, MONDAY until 5:00 am (I got 3 hours of sleep before work) and last night. We have a blast together.

    Can't say it's working wonders for my sleep patterns but it sure as shit is a lot more enjoyable than the holier-than-thou attitude your woman is giving you.

    You're an adult. You can do adult things. She's acting like a spoiled brat 15 year old who was upset someone interrupted her beauty sleep. You could have called me any time of the night and I would have been proud of you and picked you up.
     
  19. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    IMO your relationship is doomed unless one of you changes. You don't want to give up drinking/partying she doesn't want to join in your kind of fun. Your days as a couple are numbered.

    You did the right thing by calling for a ride. Perhaps next time you should call a cab instead of your SO. If you are going to be a responsible adult then not waking people up at 2am to come and get you is being responsible. I'm NOT saying drive drunk, just call a cab instead of your SO.

    However, my 2am calls for a ride were more about a booty call then a ride.
     
  20. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    I would have called a cab but I didnt have the number or the money. They only take cash in this town. Also she was awake. Well everyone it has become a much bigger problem then just the drinking now. After two years she says I dont treat her like I use to. Not enough attention. I dont flirt with her all the time like when I was trying to get with her. She gave me a warning saying things to get better or she is going to leave me.
     
  21. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    WOW. OK, that sounds like an ultimatum from an attention seeker...you're perfectly justified in dumping her now, IMO
     
  22. Mugwump

    Mugwump Guest

    And what has she done for you? Talked down to you for acting responsible...

    Dump the bitch.
     
  23. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    This is a red flag - she is basically saying "Man up and dump me." If she really cared about you, in my opinion, SHE'D flirt more with you to get YOU into the mode.

    Good luck... If you do dump her, come hang with us tonight. We're going to go out and get some drinks! :mamoru:
     
  24. big 1

    big 1 New Member

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    made me laugh too, but for a different reason: In canada, the drinking age is 18 or 19, depending on the province. So to think that a person hasnt been to a bar until theyre 21..makes me laugh.....

    my two cents:
    your girl isnt getting mad at you going to the bar, she is getting upset for a different, legitimate reason that she is not communicating to you. i think if you invited her out with you it would be different. She probably feels discluded, and is left to wonder what youre REALLY up to when you go out...even though you may not be doing anythign with other girls.
     
  25. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Still proves my point about why I laughed...there's such a big deal about being able to go to a bar and drink. I mean, as the other poster said, here in America, you're SUPPOSED to go out and get drunk on your 21st birthday.

    Way too much emphasis and value attached to something that isn't that great. Of course, I suppose you could say the same thing about sex.

    Alcohol is just a beverage...it's not life changing (well, unless alcoholism comes into play, but I doubt that results in positive life changes).

    But yeah, I agreee with you. It sounds like the problem is something else...or she's just wanting to end it and not willing to do it herself. She's started making unreasonable demands and ultimatums (treat me like you used to, be more flirty and give me as much attention as you did when we first met, or else!). Seriously, EVERYONE knows that a relationship 2 years down the line isn't going to be the same as when it started.
     

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