SRS my g/f's being stupid

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Chicago, Oct 21, 2005.

  1. Chicago

    Chicago Unleash The Dragon - Sexy Rexy For President

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    So me and my g/f have been together for over 3 and a half years now and things for the most part have been great. But lately she's been getting on my case about everything. She keeps telling me i've changed and that i'm not the same anymore. Well duh, we've been together for a long time now, and over time people change. I can't help who i've become. She tells me that I don't talk to her as much as i used to (on the phone and face to face). Sometimes there's just nothing to talk about, and im starting to hate talking on the phone, to anyone, not just her. I say that you should say what you want or need to and then hang up. I'm not gonna sit there and be like sooo what else, soooo what else. That's just stupid.

    Tonight we went out to dinner and I was watching the Virginia Tech and Maryland game on one of the tv's at the restaraunt. So i was making conversation with her every now and then etc. Then she started on her speil (sp?) of me not talking and i'm like well not like you said a whole during the whole dinner (which she didn't, she responded with a few words to watever i said and then said nothing else). I'm like you didn't make much conversation, she's like well i had lots of things i wanted to say but you don't really listen to me anyways so wahts the point?! OMG is what described my feeligns at the point. Iono, just don't know whats with her sometimes. At that point i was like watever and we just got in the car 'n drove home in silence, haven't talked to her since, which its been like 7 or 8 hours and we always talk before we goto sleep if we aren't stayin with each other that nite.

    I always feel like she turns everything against me and that im the one that needs to apologize. I hate having that feeling and i always cave in, in the end cuz i hate the silent treatment crap and i'm not much for fighting or anything. I'm a very passive guy, and it takes a lot to get me mad and to actually start yelling or what not. I usually just listen to whatever a person has to say then walk away.

    Dunno, i don't see the point in being mad about things for an extended period of time, i mite not wake up tomorrow and then what are ya gonna do. Its over and done with, get over it.

    I really odn't expect anyone to respond, but anyone else experience things like this in their relationships?
     
  2. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    We only grew closer together. I became more like him and he became for more like me.

    Maybe she is waiting for the next step and is getting annoyed because it isn't in sight :(
     
  3. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    :werd:

    Look, how old are you? Most women date men because they want to get married. If you are not making any plans to do that, you better believe things are going to start going downhill. Unlike men, who become "better" as they get older, women get less attractive and it's harder for them to get married as they get older. So, face it, she probably does like you a lot, but at this point she can't see why she is staying with you.

    I am starting to notice that most relationships have problems after about 2-3 years if they guy does not propose.

    So what is your GF telling you? Do you really want to be with her forever? If not, cut her loose. You'll find another woman in due time, and can get married later.


    For the record, I proposed to my GF a few days ago. She flat out told me that if we had been dating for more than two years she was going to be pissed. I'm 36, she's 23. Perfect timing for both of us as far as I am concerned.
     
  4. Chicago

    Chicago Unleash The Dragon - Sexy Rexy For President

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    well im 21 .. basically our relationship first started sophmore year of high school when i transfered into her school. it was one of those corny love at first sight things and it took me a year to finally ask her out .. ino i was a pussy .. but we went out for a month and i was jus head over heels about her. but then she broke up with me cuz she didn't care for me as much as i did for her. then we stayed friends and eventually midway through our senior year in high school she asked me out and then we've been together since then 3.5 years). since the moment i've seen i've always wanted to marry her and we've talked about it numerous times about how we'll do this and that after we're married etc.

    a reason why i haven't actually proposed is 1) we're still in school, we're both 21 and i wanna wait till after i have a job and some security before i think about doing that. 2) we're both hindu, the whole caste system comes into play with our parents, more so hers that mine. Both of our parents don't like the whole idea of dating because they grew up the old fashioned way and had arranged marriages. So basically they don't know about us going out, my parents sort of know, but they don't know know since i haven't actually said anything to em.

    We used to grow closer to each other after any arguments or what-not, but lately i dunno. Maybe she's just having a rough week because she had three exams and the PCAT tomorrow morning, so maybe she's stressed out. She's been known to take things out on me and get mad for no reason when she's stressed out. I guess it doesn't help hermuch when i laugh when she gets mad at me. I just find it funny though that she gets mad at really small stupid things that really has no affect on anything.

    i just dunno
     
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2005
  5. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Oh boy, am I in trouble... 2.5 years here...
     
  6. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I don't know what the deal is with all this marriage stuff. That might be the case or it might not. Either way you guys have probably gotten boring. Are you still interested, or are you comfortable?
     
  7. Chicago

    Chicago Unleash The Dragon - Sexy Rexy For President

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    i'm stil interested 'n comfortable.. sometimes i find myself a little less attracted to her becuase her personality isn't very outgoing and spontaneous, and when i meet all these other girls that have almost the opposite personality of her im like wtf. i used to be a very shy guy in high school but senior year of high school i broke outta my shell and have been a pretty much outgoing, spontaneous type of guy. i find the stupidest or smallest things amusing and i don't get embarassed easily, so sometimes i act a fool in public because i find it fun. but she gets embarassed really easily and often times she's like stop that etc. and that gets annoying after awhile cuz its like hey, lighten up enjoy yourself and have some fun.

    im not sure if i could really even break up with her or end our relationship. i can't stand to see her hurt and in the 3.5 years we've been together i can count the number of times i've raised my voice to her on one hand.

    so i broke down and called her just a little while ago and she was getting mad that i never called her or came over last nite. i was like well you were the one mad at me and she said that she thought i was mad. i've told her many times that i don't really get mad, its usually jus something annoying and i brush it off at like 5 or 10 minutes. i could care less what she did, i really wouldn't get mad at her. but for some reason she failed to realize that once again. I told her that and she's like well i don't need anything from you or your sympathy and went on about how i should've felt obligated to talk to her during dinner etc. which i think is stupid. i love her and we've been together for a long time now.. there shouldn't be a reason for either one of us to feel obligated to talk to one another. whats wrong sitting quietly and eatting dinner and just enjoying each others company. am i wrong about that ?!

    so i pussy'ed out and say im sorry, even though i don't think im wrong, but i don't see the point of arguing continuously. this is such a stupid little thing and she's blowing it outta proportion like its the end of the world.

    everything i do, i do for her and our possible future. i work and goto school at the samet ime so that i can afford to buy her gifts or take her out to dinner etc. i study harder so that i can someday provide her with all the things she's ever wanted.

    i think after being together for so long and almost living together in a sense since we stay together almost every night that its just become a little to "close" i guess .. if that makes sense. often times i look forward to being away from her so i can have some time to myself and relax. Sometimes i think a break would be nice, but that also sounds like it could end up being bad news. everythings just so jumbled up. :ugh:
     
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2005
  8. Chicago

    Chicago Unleash The Dragon - Sexy Rexy For President

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    yeah often times i wish i had waited .. at least till i went to college .. but too late for that
     

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