SRS My Exgf Had My Baby

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Xeelee, Jan 29, 2005.

  1. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    She's 27 and we broke up last year after 4 happy years together. I just got a call from her this morning. It's a girl. 6lbs 13 oz at birth and she looks alot like her. She has my eyes. She wants me to go see her this afternoon. Her parent's don't like me too much though. She'll be at home. I'm a little apprehensive about it all but I can't wait to see the little baby and my exgf.

    She's an English teacher at a local high school and I see her car in the school parking lot almost every time as I'm going to my classes at the university here. Always brings back warm memories.
     
  2. dazed

    dazed New Member

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    how do you feel about playing a role in the childs life?
     
  3. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    I would love to be a big part of the little baby's life. I miss my exgf and I find myself daydreaming about her all the time. I wish she and I would get back together but it probably won't happen. :wtc: We will see what happens. It would be cool if we really did get back together.
     
  4. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Why weren't you at the hospital to see it? Get over there this afternoon! Bring her something. Presents and shit. Bring like a big basket of food and shit. Take care of that kid.
     
  5. NeonImpact

    NeonImpact New Member

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    [​IMG]

    You can do it man! + congrats!
     
  6. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Because we broke up last year and we don't really speak that often. Once every other month at most. I will see her this afternoon.
     
  7. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Yes I know but we have not seen each other since we concieved the baby. That was the last time we've seen each other.
     
  8. sinbon1

    sinbon1 D:

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    congratulations!
     
  9. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Yes. Thank you. Doubtful I will see much of her much to my dismay. Her mother and I broke up sometime ago. But thanks. :)
     
  10. Sotangledup

    Sotangledup Guest

    aw i hope the best for you!
    try to get your ex back somehow TRY TRY!! bring her something nice and go meet your little girl :big grin:
     
  11. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    You only spoke with her every other month during her pregnancy with your child? Did you know that she was pregnant with your kid? Man... so I take it that you're going to step up the contact level now?
     
  12. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Yes. About every other month for a few minutes. Yes I knew she was pregnant. I don't think we're going to do anything different. I have another girl with my kid also. He's a big baby too. My exgf just had ours. Chances of us getting together are non-existant. Sucks but oh well, that's life. She makes decent money and she has a loving family to help with the baby.
     
  13. Jaccordan

    Jaccordan Guest

    :rofl: your not even gonna be in the kids life

    :coolugh:
     
  14. 3-5soul

    3-5soul Guest

    seriously,
    be a man and support your new baby...they are lifes most precious gifts, i just had my first 4 months ago, and now i can't imagine life without him
    don't be a deadbeat, be there for her even if you have a new gf and another baby. it will affect the child more than you know if you aren't there to show her who her dad is
    and don't establish a relationship with her and then just dissappear
    you did the deed now live up to the responsibility
     
  15. copperkali

    copperkali Mrs. Nicklk

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    Congratulations....kids are the best...try your best to see her as often as you can because the grow up so fast. I agree that you should take gifts and or food. I remember my delivery was very tough and they wouldn't let me eat for over 24 hours so I was freaking starving all day. Again...CONGRATS!
     
  16. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Tough call.

    My opinion: even though you and your girl(s) don't see each other much, you should begin to see your new kid regularly. You don't HAVE to be in her life, but you should be in your kid's life.

    But yeah, you probably weren't looking for advice, more likely just to give notice of your birth announcement, so congratulations on that point.
     
  17. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    I want to be in her life. :slap:
     
  18. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    So this kid is yours?
     
  19. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Well I just got home from seeing her at her parent's house. I knocked on the front door and her father answered it.
    "hey Xeelee, what's going on?", he said
    "nothing much how's it going"
    "just here being a grandfather!:)"
    "is she here?"
    "yes come on in"
    The little baby is so cute. :) She was looking around and sleeping. I held her and she is too cute. :) Looks alot like her mom. :)

    I was a little nervouse and apprehensive. We talked about some of the things that have been going on. Her brother got a job as coach of the girl's soccer team for a high school on the north side. Her mother is on vacation to help out with the baby. Her father got a new truck. Her sister is almost done with her schooling (she goes to the same university as I do). We didn't even talk about getting back together. We just seem to different now. She's got her life and I have mine.

    I'm not wigging out on her. Last year we had a falling out and that's when we broke up. That was the last time we've seen each other until now. She told me 2 months after we split up that she had stopped partying. I asked her why and she said because she's pregnant. I was :eek4:
     
  20. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Yes. She looks similiar to me. :)
     
  21. You must be really happy. :)
     
  22. Xeelee

    Xeelee Baryonic Lord

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    Yes. I really am. :) I'm happy that this little baby is healthy. She was all wrapped up in some blankets in her crib. Looking around for a while before she zonked out. She's got a little mobile hanging there that she stares at. :kiss:

    I'm happy that the mother is ok too. Just the simple fact that I saw her makes me happy. I've missed her dearly and I know it will never be. Not in any way I can foresee.

    Which makes me a little saddened to know that what we have is gone. We got along so well. We rarely argued. We could always carry on a conversation. She's very intelligent and not an airhead like most of the girls out there today. She has a degree in English and does some work for a linguistics research project on the side.
     
  23. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    Yeah sorry didn't read the 'my baby' in title :) Just ready 'baby'

    All I can say, as someone who has a kid to an ex, is don't confuse the child with a relationship. Be there for the kid and get over the relationship.

    :bigthumb:
     
  24. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    You don't have to be with the mother to see your kid at least every week. Try fostering a working relationship for the purpose of raising the kids. Otherwise the kid will end up hating you.
     
  25. johan

    johan Active Member

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    There's many resources available to help you structure appropriate visitation/caretaking schedules with your ex. Plenty of people do it.

    You & your ex are done, but your life with your kid is only just beginning. Don't shut it off just because of the current state of your relationship with your ex. There's a bigger issue here: the life & wellbeing of your little girl.
     

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