SRS My dad and alcohol

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by SquallRm, Apr 29, 2010.

  1. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    My dad doesn't drink a lot, but when he drinks, he gets wasted.
    My mom has a pretty good handle on it but she's gone away to Russia for two weeks.
    Little by little he started to drink at dinner, and yesterday I came home to see him stumbling around the house stinking wasted.
    He fell down the stairs in middle of the night, broke one of our frames in the process and thew up in the bathroom.
    So I bitch him out, tell him to go to sleep, and clean up.

    This morning he calls me, and says that my uncle invited us over for dinner. He lives about 40 minutes away.

    Now I know what type of dinner my uncle has in mind, and I tell my dad I don't want to go, and that he shouldn't go either because he'll get drunk and drive back wasted.

    "no no no, I'll stay over night.." he says.
    So right there, he isn't even hiding the fact that he'll be drinking and that he'll be so hammered that he'd have to spend the night.

    My uncle has work, my aunt doesn't want any part of this, they will probably hint to him that he should go home.

    He's had DUI before, and crashed car in process.

    He is leaving me no choice but to rat his ass out to the sister and/or mom.
    He won't listen to me when I try to talk to him about this and I don't much want to.

    What do you guys think?
     
  2. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    I just called my sister and told her about it. She said she spoke to him this morning and he sounded a bit off, like he might've tipped back a few.

    I'm gonna raid the house for alcohol as soon as I get home today, and I'm calling the uncle to call this little party off.
     
  3. dumb_end_user

    dumb_end_user Sad Gus

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    I say good for you for not being an enabler.

    Tell your dad to get his shit together. If that requires enlisting the help of your mom and sister do so.
     
  4. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    its important to realize too that you can't make him stop (in the same way you can't make him start, either). sounds like you are concerned, and not enabling the behavior is a great start. Check out local Al-Anon meetings, or their website, its for families of people with alcohol problems
     
  5. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    Okay I just came home and he is home and not at work. He has been drinking.
    I took his keys away, though I can't find a spare, I think it's in his wallet.
    I am now looking for all the bottles he's got hiding.
     
  6. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    I just spoke to him and he's crying about him being depressed.

    It might get bad when he sobers up, and starts to feel the withdrawal.
     
  7. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    Just found another bottle in the car, 2 liter whiskey. half of it empty.
    What a sick person, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind here.
     
  8. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    man thats rough, you need to talk to somebody with experience
     
  9. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    Well it finally happened.
    Just got a call 20 minutes ago from police department that he's been pulled over for DUI.

    FML, and fuck him that rotten piece of shit.
     
  10. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    I understand you are emotional right now, just take a few minutes to let yourself calm down. This is his problem , not yours
     
  11. Zee916

    Zee916 Engineering the world.......

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    I'm just imagining myself taking my dads car keys away from him hahaha.........

    On a more serious not. Stop worrying, this is his problem. He's a grown man.
     
  12. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    any updates?
     
  13. Chase

    Chase Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, fuck yo

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    wrong.
    and wrong

    He makes it his childs' problem when his drinking affects them.


    Problem drinking isn't just being drunk all the time, binge drinking is more of problem for people than alcoholism.

    [edited by i killed tupac: leave the flames in the main forum please]

    Obviously the family is aware of this problem, so wait for your mother to get home and then look at treatment options. Even small towns have great resources. Has your father ever attended treatment?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 17, 2010
  14. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    what i mean by "his problem, not yours" is the father has to fix it, the threadstarter cant, or he would have already. The alcoholism is the father's problem, the family damage is the family problem, imo
     
  15. brocephus

    brocephus i would unplug cooly's life support to charge my c

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    Sounds like you need an intervention after he's dried out to make him aware of the destructive nature of his drinking.
     
  16. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    something for sure
     
  17. upparoom

    upparoom OT Supporter

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    damn man. that really sucks :hs:
     
  18. kyliemeg

    kyliemeg www.theflirtingshack.com

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    Wow, I'm sorry to hear what you are going through with your dad. I went through similar issues when I was growing up. My dad put me through hell. Sorry.
     
  19. forgotmyname

    forgotmyname Active Member

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    You shouldn't be talking like that about your father. He has problems. If you can't help him, point him to the right direction.
     
  20. pharmokan

    pharmokan OT Supporter

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    my dad is russian and he drinks heavy. usually does binge drinking and then takes 3 weeks off before the cycle repeats itself. i have tried in the past to reach out, but it does not work. needless to say, he still binges, and is still alive, and i just gave up. no happy ending here. i will watch him die and then i will try to blame myself for letting it happen but in reality, he gave up on life that made him this way and i feel helpless at the same time, accept that it is his destiny. to die an alcoholic.
     
  21. pharmokan

    pharmokan OT Supporter

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    no fuckin AA for 55 year old russian who is not keen on american society's way on solving the drinking problem

    `
     

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