we'd been dating for a year and a half and last tuesday he finally broke up with me. the previous wednesday i had just returned from 6 weeks studying abroad. things felt a little different when i returned, but i assumed it was just because i'd been gone so long and he wasn't used to me being back yet... i was wrong. he told me he needs his freedom and his space, his heart just isn't "in" our relationship right now, and he is ready to be single again. but he also said he's tired of me being so dependent on him, and thinks that i need some time alone to work on that for my own good. he said he's pretty much felt like this since february or so, but wanted to wait until i went away for a while to make sure. but, even when i was gone we talked online/on the phone quite a bit, and it was practically like i was still home. i'd never been away from him this long, or even away from home alone for so long, so i was having a hard time. but he still loves me very much, just isn't in love with me right now. so, he talked to his mother about things, and she agreed that if he was unhappy in the relationship that he should end it, but she was very sad he felt that way. so he decided to break up with me once i got back, so as to not ruin my trip. i'm very close to his mother, and the rest of his family, so the day after we broke up i went to talk to her too. she thinks he's at a point in his life that he just doesn't want the same type of relationship i want; he still wants to go out with his friends all the time and just live more of a young, bachelor type lifestyle. which is definitely true, and it doesn't help that all his friends are single too right now. and she said that she thinks he's just confused and making the traditional stupid boy move when confronted with someone that they could see settling down with and marrying someday. so, because he isn't ready for that right now, he got scared and ran. i guess now would be a good time to say that he's 25 and i'm 20, but we're both in college and he's only lived out of his parents' home for a little over a year and a half now (they needed his help). so, about me and why he would be ready for his freedom. once we met (fall of my freshman year) i finally had someone else to hang out with, so i slowly stopped hanging out with all my old girl friends that i've known since high school. i had always felt that they weren't the best friends to me, this only worsened as time went on, once we were all in college i felt like we just didn't have that much in common anymore. so, i got depressed. i had a boyfriend, but i had no friends. i go to a very large school, it was my freshman year, and i felt very alone. and ever since i've had a hard time in large social scenes, have even had panic attacks, and have become pretty introverted. it's been hard to make friends, but i've always had my boyfriend, so i never really felt the need to try too too hard. so now, almost 2 years later, and i've spent almost all my time with my boyfriend. he is my best friend, and i love spending time with him, and it was just easier to do what he wanted to do, or hang out with him and his friends, rather than calling around the few friends i had left. and whenever he wanted to go out without me (or i just couldn't go, because i'm not 21), it made me SO sad. all i could think about was that i don't have friends anymore, and it was so unfair that he had all these friends who wanted to go out with, and who he could have fun with, when i was left alone. or, i'd feel like no one wanted me to go, because they had more fun without me, whether it was true or not. so usually, he'd just stay with me, or we'd figure out something else to do that i could go to as well. obviously, this is unhealthy, and just not fair to him. i always felt like i was unfair, so i'd do everything i could to make up for it; i'd buy him surprises, help him with whatever, and try to take care of things for him. not only for that, but i just really like doing nice things for him anyway. but he stayed with me, and dealt with all my crap, for a year and a half, and is finally sick of it. so, now the question is, what will happen in the future? he said the only way we can get back together is if i become more independent and confident in myself, which i've needed to do for a while now anyway. i know i have no reason to not be, i know i'm smart and cute and have a good personality and whatnot, i just can't get over whatever it is that's stopping me from truly believing in myself. and i really do want to change, i've been trying to for a long time now, but now i really have to. and i want real friends, just as much as i want my relationship back. i just really feel like we're meant to be. it's not that i fear that i'd never meet someone else, just that i feel like i found someone who i am completely happy with, we get along like best friends, he's EXACTLY what i have always wanted physically and personality-wise, i feel like we connect well intimately, and he helps me get through things better than anyone. in the past, i've practically lived with him because i was never happy where i lived. pretty soon i'm going to have an apartment all to myself, so i will be able to be more normal about giving him his space in that sense. and in january i'll be 21, so that will help with a lot of other problems. i realize these things don't truly solve anything, because no matter what, he needs his space and i need time on my own to better myself, but they will help. and i know i should do these things for me, and i'm trying to focus on myself. and i know too that whatever's meant to be, will work itself out in the end. but in the meantime, i'd really like some advice. so, i know no one has THE answer for me, but i'd appreciate any help. i'm so sorry this is so long, but i just need to talk to people about this and from what i've read i think several people could give some good advice, about any of my many problems. thanks.