SRS my boss won't forgive me for "embarrassing" her in front of customers

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by stoned_angel432, Apr 12, 2010.

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  1. On Tuesday, they called me and said not to come in bc they've overscheduled and it wasn't busy. It turned out they also called lots of other ppl and told them not to come in. Labor was just too high. However, I was paranoid and thought it was bc I made her mad on Monday. I went in and tried to apologize to her. What sounded to me like, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you mad" sounded to everyone else like, "I'M SORRY I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU MAD!" I was too loud and sounded like I panicked or something. I had unknowingly presented myself as a victim. Customers assumed she was abusing me and called to complain about her. She refused to schedule me until I could prove I could behave myself. She said I could call back next week and check to see if I have any hours back. Other than that, she was too pissed to even tell me why exactly she's so mad. Won't even accept my apologies for "embarrassing" her.

    Thing is, is that even necessary? I didn't make the customers call to complain about her. Besides, I wasn't even aware I was loud bc I just got a natually loud voice. That gives them even less reason to hold it against me. So why did they? What about the fact that I been at this job for a year and generally did good up till that point? (Earned my raise and corporate got calls from customers complimenting my service, etc.) She even accused me oh Thursday of screaming at her on Tuesday just cuz I was loud. They didn't even let me work the rest of this week. She didn't accept my apology for "embarrasing" her bc it was just too serious. I made her and the business look THAT bad.

    Quite honestly, I didn't even know what was going on till Thursday when she told me. I just wanna know, was it really that bad? Did I really deserve this consequence? btw, It also turned out I had nothing to apologize for on Monday
     
  2. weezyfbaby

    weezyfbaby New Member

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    probably just that time of the month for her.

    which is why women can not be in positions of high importance, honestly (imo)
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    So...

    #1 you embarrass her (face it, you did).

    #2 you then disavow responsibility b/c you have a "naturally loud voice"

    #3 are making it out to be everyone's fault but your own.

    #4 you insist on playing up her faults (she was "too pissed to speak to you"

    #5 she wouldn't accept your apology...how did you deliver an apology? You certainly don't sound apologetic here. Any chance your tone of voice was extremely defensive and/or accusing?

    #6 "it turns out there was nothing to apologize for on Monday." Really?
    After all this, you want to believe that it was all nothing...and by extension, you're hinting that you were right all along, and SHE overreacted?

    Or is it more likely ppl are just tired of talking to you, and are just ignoring you.

    Yes its likely she didn't schedule you on purpose. And yes, you're dreaming if you think it was nothing, and everything's fine now. Huge denial there.



    Why don't you take a minute to collect yourself, and go in, properly contrite, and explain that you realize you acted out emotionally and will try to behave like a person with manners.

    My guess is she will be ready to listen. Drop the childish "its not my fault I yelled---I ALWAYS YELL" routine.

    Even if you quit this job and tell her to shove it, it will still serve you well to develop some maturity and refinement.
     
  4. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    you are at work. you cant just say its ok for you to be loud bc you dont mean to.

    you need to work on it.

    what you said was really not that bad. the outcome, which i realize you did not desire, was bad.

    you need to REALLY apologize to her. explain you will work on your loudness. ask her for feedback on how you are doing....

    for example: starting now if you notice me being loud please tell me. i really want to work on this issue.
     
  5. Toxica

    Toxica New Member

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    Let her know you've realized you made a mistake and should have talked to her privately instead of in front of customers, you didn't realize the volume of your voice and you will work on that. Tell her that you are sorry for embarrassing her and that it wasn't your intention to do so.
     
  6. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    are you serious?

    i'm probably the most chauvanistic poster on OT and I find this statement ridiculous
     
  7. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    What kind of job? Waiter? Bartender? Retail? Anything like this don't sweat it just find another job if she truly won't accept your apology.
     
  8. weezyfbaby

    weezyfbaby New Member

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    Yes I'm serious.

    I've seen it highly affect lower employees in my company and affect their productivity. I can only imagine the effects at a management or higher level.
     
  9. She told me I had nothing to apologize for on Monday and that she won't schedule me till I "behave myself." Just for "screaming at her" on Tuesday!
     
  10. no shez 2 old.
     
  11. ldaggerl

    ldaggerl New Member

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    Honestly she seems like a bitch. Seems like you said something that didn't make her look good and now she'll pull a power trip and show you whats up. Deal with it and don't talk to her. If she continues to tell you need to "behave yourself" then call the corp office and explain what happened. Let them handle it from that point on. If its a part time job don't really push to much because they really don't care what happens to you. Its the way shit works. Every 17 year old is looking for a part time job, its not hard to replace you. Hey I pissed off my manager before and didn't get scheduled for a month. Then didn't come in for the time I had scheduled and told them I quit.
     
  12. GFlem

    GFlem New Member

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    haha, neither of you have jobs.

    You were wrong, and the threadstarter is showing her immaturity in this thread. Obviously, any delusional, ridiculous outburst you had in front of customers SHOULD HAVE BEEN DISCUSSED IN PRIVATE. If you ran up to her in the front of the restaurant, or wherever you work, and started talking about her being mad in front of guests, especially when the restaurant is in deep enough to have to care about labor being high?

    Dumb move. You should know better than this.
     
  13. ldaggerl

    ldaggerl New Member

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    Your the reason I love this place. Have no idea what your talking about and making up shit. Love it.
     
  14. BoomBoomBoy

    BoomBoomBoy Guest

    Work on losing the loud voice. It will only get you in trouble in the business world.

    As far as the situation goes, go and talk to your boss in a mature, professional manner. Explain to her your side of how things transpired, and that you won't embarrass her in the future. It sounds like the whole thing was a misunderstanding.

    And finally, work on losing the loud voice, unless you're a Drill Sergeant. :rofl::rofl:

    [​IMG]
     
  15. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    you realize YOU don't get to decide when SOMEONE ELSE forgives you, right?
     
  16. BlkDrgnZ28

    BlkDrgnZ28 OT Supporter

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    tell us what kind of job you have. but talking to the manager in front of customers about your hours is just a whiny little bitch move, fuck have some profesionalism. you probably don't have a job to go back to its probably easier to keep you stringing along rather than fire you and have you throw a bitch fit in front of more customers. i've been sent home from my job all the time when its slow shit happens fucking get over it.


    and yes it probably was her time of the month so you should definitely keep pissing her off and see what happens
     
  17. Daria

    Daria New Member

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    I'm probably the least chauvanistic poster on OT and I find the statement somewhat truthful. Most female bosses I've had are stressful to work under, because of the emotion the add to EVERYTHING. I prefer to work under male bosses, because they are not making everything dramatic or talking with hidden meanings.

    I am myself a woman by the way.

    To the threadstarter, I just want to mention that this apology: "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you mad". Is not an apology. You should be regretful for whatever made your boss "mad", not the fact that you made her mad. Ie. "I am sorry that I arrived late", "I am sorry that I miscounted the change", etc. This way:
    1 - you've identified the problem
    2 - you've admitted that what you did was wrong
    3 - you are leaving your boss out of the apology, making it impersonal and completely focused on the issue
    4 - you boss will be happy that you have done 1 and 2, because the problem could not otherwise be resolved without that
     
  18. GFlem

    GFlem New Member

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    1) You're, and your. Learn the difference.

    2) Judging from YOUR reply to this thread, I can safely say that YOU'RE not defining "job" the same way that I do. Regardless, you telling her to give her manager the silent treatment (are we still in high school, sweetie?), and to go over her head to corporate ( :ugh: ) over a personal matter (double-:ugh: ) just about illustrate your relative maturity in professional matters, and do the threadstarter a disservice.

    HR is 100% not going to care about her situation because the threadstarter is disruptive to the work environment and they can replace a worker bee a lot faster than a GM.

    Once you get a real job, where professionalism is required, I hope for your sake that you don't act like you recommend here.
     
  19. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    not to mention that he obviously did something prior, otherwise what could he have done which made her mad?
     
  20. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    so you've probably been throwing a fit about her not giving you hours since the incident, and she's telling you to calm the fuck down

    how about calming the fuck down?
     
  21. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    :werd:

    regardless of the volume of your voice.
     
  22. It turned out I didn't do anything to make her mad. I only apologized just bc I was paranoid I did something wrong on Monday the 5th. She told me the next day that I had nothing to apologize for.

    GFlem, how was I disruptive to the work environment? Yes, I caused a scene in front of customers, who were all staring at me, btw, but I didn't know I was doing it until she told me.

    And as for what job I have, I work at fast food.
     
  23. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    You said 'I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you mad'

    Which means you did something which could be construed as inappropriate, and that's why you assumed she was punishing you

    So couple that + the way you handled the day + your continued shenanigans and no wonder she's not giving you hours until you start to behave
     
  24. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    In short: Grow the fuck up and stop acting like a child
     
  25. I was paranoid that I did something that could be construed as inappropriate. She told me I didn't do anything such thing. I apologized fobc I was paranoid. Can you be more specific about the way I handled the day?
     
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