MIL Murphy's Laws Of Combat

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by TRN, Oct 5, 2005.

  1. TRN

    TRN Well-Known Member

    Aug 22, 2003
    Likes Received:
    North East
    1. Murphy was a grunt.
    2. You are not supermen. (Freshly graduated recruits from Marine boot camp and all fighter pilots, especially, take note)
    3. A sucking chest wound is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
    4. Recoilless rifles -- aren't.
    5. Neutral countries -- aren't.
    6. Suppressive fires -- won't.
    7. Friendly fire -- isn't.
    8. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
    9. Incoming fire has the right-of-way.
    10. If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.
    11. When the enemy is closing, the artillery will always be long.
    12. If the enemy is in range, SO ARE YOU.
    13. Tracers work BOTH ways.
    14.Anything you can do can get you shot -- including doing nothing.
    15. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
    16. When in doubt, empty the magazine.
    17. If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed towards you.
    18. Any ship can be a minesweeper... once.
    19. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
    20. Don't look conspicuous-- it draws fire. (For this reason aircraft carriers have been called "bomb magnets")
    13. Try to look unimportant, because the bad guys may be low on ammo. (Trivia devotees will recall the sudden disappearance of rank and distinctive caps on the uniforms worn by Soviet officers in Afghanistan)
    14. Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.
    15. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
    16. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
    17. Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you.
    18. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share to take.
    19. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
    20. It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.
    21. The simple things are always hard.
    22. The easy way is always mined.
    23. The important things are always simple.
    24. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
    25. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
    26. The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions: 1. When you're ready for them. 2. When you're not ready for them.
    27. No plan survives first contact intact.
    28. If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.
    29. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
    30. When both sides are convinced they are about to lose, they're both right.
    31. Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together.
    32. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately. (Corollary: Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both)
    33. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out. (This seems to be the guiding design principle behind the Soviets' BMP and our own Bradley infantry fighting vehicle, both of which nicely package the troops in armored boxes for group destruction.)
    34. Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate -- the bombs always hit the ground.
    35. No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection
    36. Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
    37. Beer math is 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.
    38. Body-count math is 3 guerillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemy killed in action.
    39. Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.
    40. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
    41. All five-second grenade fuses will burn down in three seconds.
    42. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
    43. Smart bombs have bad days too.
    44. Remember that napalm is an area weapon.
    45. Push to test... Release to detonate.
    46. Once the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
  2. TRN

    TRN Well-Known Member

    Aug 22, 2003
    Likes Received:
    North East
    or these could be added

    1. A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit. - the Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
    2. Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid.
    3. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
    4. If God had meant for us to be in the Marines, we would have been born with green, baggy skin.
    5. Never trust a private with a loaded weapon, or an officer with a map.
    6. Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography.
    7. The difficult we do immediately. The impossible takes a little while longer. - U.S. Navy Seabees
    8. The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war.
    9. All other things being equal, the side with the simplest uniforms wins.
    10. Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who don't.
    11. We are not retreating, we are advancing in another direction.
    12. Who cares if a laser guided 500 lb bomb is accurate to within 9 feet?
    13. Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons!
    14. Sniper's motto: "Reach out and touch someone."
    15. You don't win a war by dying for your country. You win a war by making the other son-of-a-bitch die for his. - General Patton
  3. Crackaboy

    Crackaboy New Member

    Mar 1, 2005
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    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    "Close Air Support Isnt"
  4. mongorunner

    mongorunner New Member

    Apr 15, 2004
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    TEXAS k?

  5. clever_username

    clever_username Active Member

    Jul 8, 2005
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    Oklahoma City
    an addition to number 35. no inspection ready unit has ever passed combat
  6. [HRT]Squirrel Master

    [HRT]Squirrel Master New Member

    Mar 21, 2005
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    I like this one :)

    14. Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.

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