SRS Money rant.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by S13RedTop, Aug 24, 2006.

  1. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    I always find myself in the same position anywhere from a week to a couple days before I get paid. Worrying, wondering, how I'm going to put gas in my car to drive the 80 miles round trip to my job. Bearing the pain in my stomach when I don't eat, or the embarrassment of having to turn down an enjoyable event with friends because I'm broke. I don't mean broke, like, got a little saved up, as a crutch, I mean broke, like intentionally overdrafted my bank account because I had to fill my gas tank. Not a cent to my name at 23 years old. Absolutely horrible with my money. I'm not in debt (anymore), and I don't have a car payment. I live on my own, with a room-mate, the bills get split, and as far as living expenses go I am within my means. I've never really saved a single penny of my money since I got my first job at 16. Every dollar that has come into my posession has been spent, blown, on nothing. Nothing to show for it. The feeling of knowing I am incapable of providing for myself in case of an emergency (parents paid $1700 to put a new motor in my car a couple months ago, for example) haunts me. I'm supposed to be moving at the end of October into a place by myself, 1B/1BR, and have been mindful of the fact that I'm going to need a pretty hefty amount of money available to pay for deposits and other things that will be required of me when I move. I don't even have any fucking furniture to call my own. Yet, here I sit, the day before I get paid again, almost a hundred dollars in the hole, wondering if the gas in my car is going to be enough to get me home today. And it's all reminiscent of the last week I got paid. I'm trapped in an irresponsible and never-ending cycle. I'm not rich, I'm also not bottom of the barrel. I'm single; no dependants. Tomorrow is the day I get to try it all over again. Wake up feeling happy when I check my balance online, telling myself it's time to really dig in and get some money saved so that I'm not begging my parents for mercy when it's time to move. This week I'm actually in an even better position to save some, after getting a check with a nice chunk of overtime on it. What's left after my bills would be plenty for any normal person in my position to live off of. I know I have to change things, and this is my chance...but I still sit here questioning myself.

    I don't expect any advice I haven't already been given. I just wanted to get this out.
     
  2. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    When you say:
    then say:
    Then say:
    You aren't living in reality....or perciving your reality properly. You need to stop lying to yourself first. Be honest and then you can start addressing your issues.

    When you are living paycheck to paycheck and have no savings....YOU ARE NOT LIVING WITHIN YOUR MEANS! Stop decieving yourself. Living within your means includes EVERYTHING in your life...not just bills. Shit if I used your logic, I could say that I was the richest man on the face of the earth because I only spent $40 this week on gas! WOOT!! YAY ME!!!

    Sounds retarded when I say it but you are using the same logic to say that you are living within your means. You are not...you need to stop decieving yourself in this regard first...then you can fix your problems.

    Now....there are 2 ways to have more disposable cash. 1) Increase you income 2) cut your expenses. It's literally that simple.

    You're young...get a second job and start saving your money. It's time to grow up. Your parents wont support you forever.
     
  3. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    Thanks :hs: ...if anybody sounds retarded here, it's me.
     
  4. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Perhaps I was a bit too harsh. I apologize but I was trying to drive my point home. Trust me, I know what you are going through as I have been in similar, if not worse, situations. I was even struggling with these issues till mid twenties.

    I guess you just sounded a lot like me when I was your age. The good news is you can fix this. I would suggest getting the book, "The Richest Man in Babalon". It's an older book but the paperback is only like $5 or something. I've read this many, many times and it is seriously one of the best books on personal finance out there.....many people don't even realize how powerful it is because they get hung up on either the title or the writing style.

    Anways, you can fix this situation if you want to. The choice is yours.
     
  5. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    i have struggled with money for years now. and i feel like a complete loser because of it. i worked cash jobs in high school and had more money than i knew what to do with. then came college, and the money disappeared effing fast.

    but coottie's right

    you can fix the situation if you want to. The choice is yours.

    i don't think it's about how *much* you have, as much as *how you use what you have*

    i don't use my money wisely, thus i don't usually have any.
    however, my s/o *always* has money because he budgets wisely and uses his extra money within reason.

    i hear you, it completely sucks when you're living paycheck to paycheck and deliberately overdrawing on the account.
    but people like you and i just have to learn to be responsible with money.

    coottie i think that book might be good for me to read too.
    thanks for the suggestion.

    S13, good luck. I hope you get this sorted out.
     
  6. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    I thank you both very much for your replies.
     
  7. JakobwithaK

    JakobwithaK Titty fuck for the win!

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    Dude dont feel bad, Im 25 and still living at home with the rents:o
     
  8. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    S13 you're welcome :)

    lol i would be too if i didn't have a s/o who owned a house....:rolleyes:
     
  9. Sandwich

    Sandwich OT Supporter

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    i've found that opening an online savings account (i have emigrant) helps a lot with saving. set up a recurring, automatic withdrawl from your checking acct to the online acct every week, or every 2 weeks...and leave it alone. make it enough to save a decent ammount ($50/week?), but not so much that it hurts you. limit your spending per week to a set reasonable amount. if you have some leftover at the end of this week, take out the same amount for next week and now you have extra for the next week..thats how i do it.. sometimes you can have a really good week like that and not worry about spending it cause it was already set aside for blowing. i personally do $100/week for going out to eat sometimes, going out on the weekend and misc purchases during the week. The only time i ever tap into my online savings is if i need to do something to the house or if i need to pay off a CC

    CC's are my personal problem right now..

    i wont lie.. i live paycheck to paycheck myself, but i save and watch what i spend. sometimes i spend irresponsibly with the CC's but then i catch myself before it gets out of control and take time to save and pay them off.

    just giving some suggestions and my personal experience. :hs: good luck bro
     
  10. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    Thank you very much for taking time out to reply. I have, in fact, looked at setting up a savings account online. I found that ING had great interest rates and there are no fees or minimum balances. Tomorrow's going to be the day I finally open it. I have to. This can't continue.

    PS - I got myself into about 9k of credit card debt around 19 years old and got it all paid off about 6 months ago. This was partially due to one of the card issuers settling out at about half of what I owed, and chipping away slowly and then serving up the death blow to the other with a nice tax return. I am devestatingly frightened to get a credit card again. At least for a pretty long time.
     
  11. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    way to go
    :)
    that's awesome
     
  12. civicmon

    civicmon got all my game from the streets of california.

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    my parents just sent me $800 because I seriously overdrafted my account.. that's how bad I am w/ money.
     
  13. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    PM me if you want an invite for ING. If you put in a minimum balance of $250 after someone invites you, ING gives you $25. Free money. I find ING to be good...the only disadvantage is that it takes about 2 or 3 business days to transfer money in and out. Which isn't a bad thing if you're trying to prevent easy spending anyway.

    I think you're one of the smart ones if you've recognized this problem at your age. You got yourself out of debt. Great work. Now, not only should you start saving, but as soon as you've saved up maybe $500 - $1000.... start to "pay yourself" by putting into a retirement account. And then put a little 10% chunk of whatever you earn into that after each paycheck.

    That money will always be yours, whereas a "savings" is only money you're holding there till you have to give it to someone else. I learned this philosophy a little later then you...but it's never too late to start.
     
  14. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    I am EXACTLY like you.
    I am also 32.
    I spent my 20's doing what you did.
    Here is what I have figured out.
    There are things in life I am good at (I.T. related stuff for example) and there are things in life I am not good at (finances).
    Sometimes in my life the trick of it is to figure out what I am good at and what I am not good at and approach those things honestly.
    There is no point in me trying to fool other people and say that I have finances under control. I have NEVER had finances under control.
    I lived my 20's under that lie, it didn't get me anywhere.

    When I reached my 30's I realized that when I dated someone I better be damned sure to find a woman good with finances - and at the first opportunity make her take over all my finances and give me an allowance.
    I always kind of felt like less of a man for being like that. But now that I am doing that I am way happier of a person.

    Of course that doesn't really help you NOW.
    But let me offer a suggestion that might help you now. Do you know anyone that you trust that is good with finances? Your parents? A really, really close friend?
    You don't literally have to hand them your check. You can just agree to meet once a week and hand them all your bills. If you follow my philosphy and agree that you suck at finances and that you will always suck at it then allow them to keep your checkbook.
    They will make sure all your bills are paid and tell you how much you have to live off of for the week.

    In a way it is like being an alcoholic and having a sponsor. I still call my girlfriend up before buying crap. I won't buy so much as a comic book without asking her.

    I am truly happier living like this.
     
  15. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    Congratulations on doing that.
    That demonstrates that you are a good person with good intentions. Some people will do anything to not have to pay stuff like that.

    Seriously, you are not really in any trouble at all. You are just like me, you suck at this finances thing.
    You realize that every 7 years your credit rating cleans itself up?

    After 7 years the credit rating companies are required to take bad stuff off your credit report.
    So if you behave yourself for 7 years no one will ever even know about that credit card foul up when you were 19.
     
  16. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    I take care of a friend's money. X is terrible with managing his finances. Good Lord. He was spending like a fool on absolutely nothing. He signs over his paycheque to me every payday. I give him an allowance, make sure his bills are paid, etc. Been doing it for almost 3 years. He is out of debt, he now has a LIRA, RRSPs, Mutual Funds and sleeps better at night. I do this for him because other than being abolsutely useless with his finances, he is a good friend and wonderful person. He trusts me (obviously) and knows I do not need his money.
    I learned how to manage money and the art of being thrifty from my Grandparents.
    Perhaps you can find someone you trust who is good with a buck to handle your finances for you. I know there are organizations out there that will also do a budget for you (free) and whatnot.
    Making a game out of saving money, being thrifty, shopping around for the best deals, buying things when they are on sale, etc. can be quite fun actually, however, it takes discipline.
    You'd be surprised how much $$ you can amass with just a bit of self-control.
     
  17. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    Thank you all very much :) Great advice in here.
     
  18. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    I originally found out about them through my dad who has also offered me an invite. Thank you though.
     
  19. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    ditto on handing over your finances
    i am working on handing mine over to my s/o - read, i am letting go of the ego that says i can do it myself. because it's not how much you have, it's all about how you budget and use your money. that, and realizing that some of us just suck with money. :mamoru:
     
  20. S13RedTop

    S13RedTop New Member

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    I'd rather try my best to get in the groove on my own. I have considered this option however.

    I opened an account with ING about 15 minutes ago. Pretty quick and simple process! Looks quite promising.
     
  21. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    :) best of luck :)
     

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