So I've finally decided to stop hiding from it. About 16 months ago I got ffxi for pc and it was probably one of the biggest mistakes of my life(damn eb for not having halo for pc in stock ). Since then I have dedicated every second of my time to playing this damn game. I have been lucky to work on call in the past so I'd spend sometimes all day, playing hell even 15hrs a day for the past 3 days for sure. Its now june, the weather is great and I wanna go outside, go to beaches, hang out w/ friends and just enjoy life, LIVE, not just play this stupid game all the time. I am sitting here trying to find the courage to quit but I dont know what it is inside me that stops me. I cant help it, this game actually gives me more stress than in my personal life too. I get stressed about leveling up(i personally hate it/doing crap for $$/and just dealing with total assholes that play). However, I have met some very nice people while playing this game which I think could possibly be one of the major reasons for me not quitting. I've invested about 300 Game Days behind this game since i got it feb 2004. I personally sometimes ask myself how much of a jackass I can be, I am often very angry at myself for not digging up the courage to just hit delete character button and end it all. Lately I've been trying to go out more often, hang out with friends, and just not think of it, but its not working, like i think of ffxi when I am playing basketball or cant wait to get back home to get on this damn drug. I also belive that I have wasted 300 days of my life playing this game because I used to be a pretty good programmer, on my way to start learning assembly language and so on. Since I got ffxi i haven't ever touched my C++ book, i honestly have no fucking clue where it is right now, and I have also lost touch with some of my friends. My friends told me straight up I dont chill much anymore, I avoid their phone calls (obviously to go out) so i can play ffxi when i am off work. The thing is...they're absolutely right. I am ashamed of it. Another thing is, I tried quitting before but then people that play the game with will be kinda devestaged that I quit b/c in terms of end game shit in that game I basically gave my clan single handed ability to beat everyone else b/c of cheats . I know some ppl might be liek "dude wtf are you thinking, this is YOUR life, YOU need to fix it, you dont want to end up like some loser geek that is a mmorpg god but cant remember the last time they saw the sun." I know this, I know my failures, but I just cant fucking do it!!! This is the only thing I cant find a way to get out of. Heck I used to be a pot head and I quit about 5months ago, and in all honesty it was 50x easier to do than to quit this game. I just want my life back and I am losing this battle, if anyone can offer any advice I would appreciate it. Thx.