SRS meeting gf's fam , not good (little vent i guess)

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Helmet, May 18, 2007.

  1. Helmet

    Helmet New Member

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    well ive been with my gf for almost 6 months. and we are very happy together. we are positive that this will be a long relationship. well shes been wanting me to meet her parents. im cool with that. she wants me to so we can hang out in her house and not have to go out and spend cash to see each other.always knew that her mom was mean but she told me more about them. im supposed to meet them next week. i expected her mom to be mean and dad to be cool like she told me but i guess now every thing is against me. first of all shes pilipino going to start her phD program next year lives in a very nice area in LA in a nice big house ,and her parents are very successful. well her mom wants her to marry a pilipino doctor that comes from a good family with money. and her dad doesnt like latinos. alittle info on myself. im hispanic, not a doctor and not planning on being one. im a bmw technician.and i come from a good caring family, but really far from being rich. i wasent nervous about meeting them but now, i am. i got really sad when she told me some of the things she haddent told me. she said that nothing external would keep her from loving me. but i would just be devastated if they told her she could not see me anymore, especially if they talk crap about my background and that my parents are not rich and dont have a big nice house (live in an apt with my mom dad and sis.). all this shit just really puts me down. im still gonna love my gf but this will make it tough. well thats that . thanx for reading about my dang problem :(
     
  2. PanzerAce

    PanzerAce Active Member

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    Well, I would say be as polite as possible, dress up a little for the occasion (polo shirt, khakis, nice shoes), and generally be as polite as possible. If you and her are happy together, then good parents should be able to get over their prejudices and be happy for her.

    Hang in there man, I'm sure it'll turn out better than you think :hug:
     
  3. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    You can't go into this interaction with all these preconceived notions about them.

    People are really good at surprising you.

    Be confident that you are a good person, and the right man for their daughter.

    Ultimately, she will choose her mate, not them.

    I'm sure they wouldn't want to create a rift right off the bat. Don't give them an "easy out" to go that route.
     
  4. gjunon

    gjunon OT Supporter

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    yeah they will try to work against you every step of the way but once you have proven that your a decent guy and that you are willing to support thier daughter you will win them over.
     
  5. gjunon

    gjunon OT Supporter

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    think of it this way they can loose a daughter or gain a son in law.
     
  6. Nyctrias

    Nyctrias If I can't be my own...I'd feel better dead.

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    Sounds like her parents have her whole life planned out for her. You may be walking into a seemingly crappy situation, but just realize her mother is materialistic, and her father is biased. You're in love with their daughter, not them.
     
  7. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    They're not going to like you thats a given they have these standards for her already laid out...just hold out hope that your g/f will stand up for herself and you if her parents try to give her shit about seeing you.
     
  8. cookiesandvodka

    cookiesandvodka OT Supporter

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    make sure you got your sir's and ma'am's down. of course dress nicely. change the dad's view. you don't have to be a doctor but i'm sure you have thought about your future, spruce it up a little bit, don't lie but make sure you know what your gonna say. obviously the mom is very materialistic but at least make them feel safe that there daughter has a guy that will treat her right. don't just worry about the parents. show your girl you can handle yourself and them, show no weakness!! =D good luck brother!
     
  9. glass

    glass New Member

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    playing off the "first generation filipino" card

    - drive/motivation to make something of yourself isn't a substitute for being rich, but it helps. don't most filipinos relocate to the US to escape poverty?

    - most filipinos are roman catholic. before walking in there, i'd at least try to articulate my views on morality/religion and how it affects my decision-making. don't make a point to bust it out, but be ready.

    wouldn't latinos and filipinos have a lot in common? it should be to pick out experiences from your family life that they can relate to due to cultural similarities, at least to get you on their side. maybe that'll be enough, maybe it won't.
     
  10. KingKhai

    KingKhai New Member

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    First off, if you two really loves each other then nothing else matter. And secondly, while making a good first impression is important. Don't pretent to be anything you're not, just be yourself. They can take it or leave it. No matter what happens, they or you can't change who you are. Besides, your gf's a big girl, she can decide who she wants to date. GL dude!
     
  11. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    as a wise man once said just be yourself whatever happens they cant take that away from you
     
  12. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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  13. glass

    glass New Member

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    Re: "just be yourself"
    http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=2796774

    you don't come to a job interview wearing what you wear the other 364 days of the week. if you had a guy hoping to be your son in law, you'd expect him to bend a little to please you, wouldn't you? i think this is obvious. plan a bit.
     

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