SRS me thinking too much about my relationship?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by mr_barbra, May 9, 2007.

  1. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    hi there, im 18 and ive been going out with the same girl for the past 20+ months

    Weve had a couple of breakups in the past (she did it), each one lasting about 2 weeks, but anyway this past week ive felt really weird about this relationship

    now our 2 closest friends (both male)
    1 does NOTHING, starting education in september, does nothing else
    other is doing temp work so some weeks working other not

    The past week has gone like this

    Saturday - me working during the day, eveing go to hers, 2 friends are there as well and a couple of others all stay round

    sunday - say goodbye to GF, go to work

    Monday - neither at college as its a bank holiday, friend number 2 stays over at hers

    Tuesday - me go to college, she goes to work placement.

    Wednesday (today) - friend number 2 goes round to hers during the day as she didn't want to go into college, they go shopping and friend number 1 goes as well
    I call her up, hoping she would pick up that i wasn't feeling right (this and other stuff going on) , she doesn't talk about her self.

    friend number 2 is staying over

    Its not that i don't trust the friends, or her, but i get those 2 friends actually boast they have seen her more than I have, i get annoyed

    Am i making something out of nothing?

    I feel really angry at the moment, i don't even know why :(
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Your naturally scared that one of your friends will take her.

    The break ups only made it so that there's only more ground to cheat on you, im not saying its happening or that it happend, but its very unstable ground, and i'll pull a red flag.

    You should perform more control, more contact and more communication on what's going on. Don't expect her or them to have crystal balls which can read your mind. Only by talking you can inform eachother about what's going on in your and her life.

    I wouldn't expect her to say anything, but i would definitly in a very subtle way try to release some info from your friends on what they did that night.

    Im not asking you to become a victim of the paranoid, but to perform controls and checkups is wise every now and then.

    You need to be there for your gf, i think that if you don't have the time to invest you shouldn't be in a relationship in the first place.

    At this moment its all very shady on what's going on, try to steer her back in your court, or at least to the point that you can check on what's she's doing.
     
  3. Neelz

    Neelz Guest

    What I can say is that it must be that your gf is not interested in you. It is foolish to say but man are stupid in some ways. The general people say this. Infact, men have to labour hard to have a girl, while a girl even if she is sitting like a whore she will have tons of men at her back.

    So try to have a new start with someone new. mayB behind your back she is having some merry time with your friends. I had experienced it. Dont always trust girls.
     
  4. T-R-T

    T-R-T New Member

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    Break up with her. She either is fucking or has fucked at least one of them, guaranteed.
     
  5. Vic Mackey

    Vic Mackey New Member

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    I agree.

    My husband and I have a very close friend who is male. Never is a million years would I ask this friend to stay overnight while my husband was gone, nor would I ever stay by him alone. It's not a trust issue, it's a respect issue.
     
  6. awdboost

    awdboost New Member

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    I know how you feeling. I would say just call her out on it.

    Ask her whats up with her, and tell her how you are annoyed by how they spend more time with her than you do. If she blows it off then just call her out on it. If you suspect she is doing something with the two other guys. Just ask her, don't try to play games. Just ask her:

    "Are you fucking/messing/hooking up (whichever you want to use) with xxxx or xoxo."

    If she says yes punch her in the face lol na just kidding. Break up with her and leave.
     
  7. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    well i saw her on the firday, she seemed fine, really happy to see me and it seemed okay
    I made comments about the week, she didn't realise it bothered me at all, i talked to the dude about it, and all they said was "why didn't you come round?"

    I didn't come round because no one asked me to

    any way its now wednesday, havent seen her since the weekend (where she was weird to me - i can tell something was wrong, either with us or her)

    shes comming over in about an hour, i think i need to talk to her, just don't know what to say.

    These past few weeks we just don't seem very close anymore -wether its not saying i love you on the phone, not being excited when we see each other - she recently got sky (well her parents did), i didn't even know.

    Its just not like how it used to be, it wasn't perfect, but it felt nice, i just don't feel as close
    We shall see

    /rant
    :)
     
  8. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Her breaking up with you twice and getting back together shows me that she is in control of the relationship. You've basically proven that she can dump you and you will still take her back. That's a bad message to send a girl, especially one who is hanging out with other guys.
     
  9. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    i recently found this thread and felt like updating it so here goes.
    about a few weeks after this, she goes away for a week, i try and meet up with her, she is seeing a friend on the only day she is free, i say call me when you want to meet up.
    That night she sends me an email saying we should break up.

    2 months later i see her at a party, we talk and its really nice, i'd just met someone else by this point, but my new gf left the party, i spend the night talking the ex, and eventually kiss.

    I see the ex about a month later and she's really upset because she wants to go back out with me and im with this new person, i get upset beacuse i hate seeing her upset and leave. This was in about august.
    Since then ive had about we have texted each other about 20 times, just random rubbish. looking back at this thread made me realise how badly she treated me and made me realise i should 100% never talk to her.

    New girlfriend is amazing, been really supportive about all this, letting me talk to her about the ex and what not, and just being all round amazing. Bit annoyed that her mother won't let her stay over, but then she is 15 (im 18 before any jokes are made) so i can understand

    no real point to this except to help clear my head, and well to get peoples opinion on all this
    sorry for turning this into a blog
     
  10. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    glad to hear you're done with the ex. The whole "her breaking up with you for 2 weeks at a time multiple times" was a ref flag for immaturity.

    Now, on to the new gf...hate to sound harsh, but don't expect it to last. You'll be starting college, she'll be in high school...it will be harder and harder for you two to relate as time goes on.

    I speak from experience.
     
  11. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    friend 2 is fucking her. case closed.
     
  12. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    funnily enough i found out after that they did make out, kissing. bastards
     
  13. Dreams2Reality

    Dreams2Reality saywhat

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    ..Terrible.

    What are friends for? Terrible.
     
  14. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    lol if you are over 18 and staying the night, you aint 'just kissing' your have sex
     
  15. kEVOgt350

    kEVOgt350 Like a flashlight on but lost, my energy's there b

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    So you're upset that she kissed someone else when you were together when you went and did it yourself? :ugh2:
     
  16. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    He's young and did something dumb. He saw all the signs and pointed them all out, even subconsciously, with his description. I believe he was probably confused in a moment, got it all mixed up with reality, and it happened. Not that he was right, because to some people thats a bigger deal than sex lol.

    Good luck with this one. She must be pretty understanding that's for sure, and only 15 lol. Then again I knew a girl who was 15 and more mature and intelligent than some people who are much older.
     
  17. Asherman

    Asherman New Member

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    If you want and are ready for a long-term relationship, get married. In the absence of a formal commitment, both parties remain free to look around for a better, and perhaps more stable relationship. By all means talk with your girl friend and clarify between the two of you what your relationship actually consists of.
     
  18. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    yeah i didn't excatly plan to make out with the ex, just kind of happened, but i told the girlfirend what happened anyway.
    for 15 she is really mature, i mean she knows exactly when something is wrong, even when i say nothing is wrong, and she is really great to talk to about just stuff.
    I mean there are times when she does show her age, such as getting hyper on fizzy drinks :ugh: , but the mature side makes up for it.

    im worried though, as in a week i will be 19, she will be 15 (for about 2 weeks)
     
  19. Sexy Beast

    Sexy Beast New Member

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    So did you ever find out whether either of the two guys that were really good friends with your ex ever do anything with her behind your back that whole time?
     
  20. mr_barbra

    mr_barbra New Member

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    nope, i mean the really close guy now is madly in love with her, and he is the one who told me about the kiss. to be honest i don't really want to know, i want to remember the good times, and never see her again.

    ah it feels good to get it all of me chest
     
  21. Kirbys Autumn

    Kirbys Autumn Mrs. Kirby McSpic

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    I'm really glad you got over the ex. But, as said before by matt don't expect this to last too long. She is only 15 and as intellligent and mature as she may be she's still a child and her parents aren't going to be letting her so late at night. Now you may be saying this doesn't bother you but take it from someone who been there, it will eventually get to you. Pretty soon you'll be a college student, and she's still in high school. It's going to be really hard. Don't get me wrong if true love exists there who knows what could happen? I went out with some for 2 yrs, broke up for a yr, recently realized we still love each other and now we're planning on getting married. But, just take it one step at a time and don't get your hopes up too high. Best of luck.
     
  22. Rich

    Rich New Member

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    You're 18.

    1. Fuck her
    2. Bail
    3. Party
    4. ???
    5. Profit.
     

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