SRS Me, a car, and my parents

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by metalfan111, Aug 5, 2006.

  1. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    I don't know where to put this, so I guess it fits best here.

    I turn 17 in about a week. In the beginning of the summer, I got a job and didn't know what I was going to spend my money on. I then decided that I wanted to buy a car for myself. I told my parents and at first they laughed at me, but then said I can buy it when I have the money, but I'll have to pay for insurance. I'm fine with that.

    So all Summer, I get really excited because I'll finally have my own car. I finally get enough money and find a car and tell my parents and they refuse to let me buy it.

    They say that I can use my sister's car when she is at college and that I would be wasting my money if I buy a car. They said that I go to college after this year so it would be a waste since I'm not allowed to bring the car with me.

    I ask them why did you say I could buy it in the first place. They said they should have never said that. But its too late for that, they did tell me I could buy it, they can't just change their mind like that.

    I keep asking them that what am I going to do when she comes home for vacation? She comes home for a month for Xmas, like 3 months for summer, plus all the other small vacations that she would come home for. It's her car so she gets to use it when shes home so I'll be out of luck and there are no other cars to use.

    My parents keep saying we can work it out, but that won't work. When shes not at school, she works 5 days a week, 9AM to 6PM and goes out on the weekends. I'll be stuck in the house all day. I keep telling my parents that and they said it will work out, but I know it won't. They say I can buy one in a few years, but how do I know all this won't happen again when the time comes? I need a car NOW anyways.

    They each saved up their money and bought a car when they were teenagers, so why can't I? They said I could buy one, and now they change their mind like that, and it ruins everything I've been looking foward to.

    What could I say to them to convince them to let me buy a car. It is complete bull shit.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 5, 2006
  2. Jester

    Jester OT Supporter

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    Hmm. It's a horrible precedent to set when they give you an "if you do x, you can do x" statement and when you do x, they won't let you do x.

    And what car did you find? That might have something to do with it.
     
  3. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    The kind of car isn't why they changed their mind. They are just bitches like that.
     
  4. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    How much money have you saved up? If I had to guess, you've maybe got $3-4K in savings, yes?

    My bet is that your parents don't want you blowing all of your savings on a car that cheap, knowing that it will probably need some work to be able to stay running, and that you won't be able to afford to keep it on the road (ultimately) while still going to school. If I were you, I'd ask if they'd let you buy a car if you saved up a bit more money so you could buy a NICER car that will need less repair work done on it right away.
     
  5. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    Have you asked them that question, or are you assuming? If you're just assuming that, you're making a huge ass of yourself.:nono:
     
  6. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Personally I would bet it has more to do with your attitude ;) You are coming accross as an ignorant spoiled little prick who thinks the world revolves around him. Yes it sucks that your parents changed their minds about the car, but they DO have some valid reasons behind it.

    My suggestion to you is to be respectful for them and don't beg for the car. If you are disrespectful and throw a fit over it, it will only confirm their belief that you are not mature enough for a car.
     
  7. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    My friends dad owns a garage and he fixes up cars for a living. He found a car for me and can fix it up and I can afford it. Trust me, it will work and be very reliable.

    I have asked them what the reason was, and they said because it would be a waste when I have my sisters car. The thing is, I won't have my sisters car when she is home, so I'll be stuck.

    And wtf 03 white zx3? There is nothing wrong with my attitude. Changing their mind on something huge like that and then not having good reasons to back it up is not something parents should be doing. They should be doing things that i can look up to and let me make decisions so I can learn from them.

    You have no idea what my parents are like. I'm just asking for help and then you come in this thread bashing on me, when its really my parents being bad parents. I could list tons of things my parents have done that no responsible and caring parent would have done. My parents do things just to make their life happier, not to make me happier.

    I am plenty mature enough for a car. When my parents pull off bull shit moves like this, it drives me nuts.

    If they gave me good reasons why I shouldn't buy a car, then I would be OK with it, but they have no good reason!

    I am the last thing from spoiled. I have to pay for almost every piece of entertainment I have, and I hardly have anything. You have no idea how many hard times I have gone through, don't even begin to bitch about me. You have no idea what my life is like.
     
  8. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Let's just put it this way. I am a mother and if my child ever gave me the attitude that you are giving off right now (not to mention the lack of respect you are showing for your parents), there is no way in hell they would get a car before their 18th birthday and they were on their own supporting themselves.

    I am not bashing you, I am giving you my take on it. Afterall you ARE looking for different people's views on the situation and how you can help the situation, right? I gave you my opinion and what you can do about it. Take it for what it's worth.

    To be completely honest I don't care what you have been through. I'm not bitching about you and you're right I have no idea what your life is like besides your "oh poor me, my parents are bitches" posts.
     
  9. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    Holy shit, I'm not even going to bother arguing with you.

    I'd appreciate anyone else's advice regarding my original post.

    There is no problem affording the car, insurance, and possible repairs, even when school starts, because I work all year.
     
  10. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Why do you want to spend your time working and paying for those things when you could use your sister's car and cut the bills down from them? :hsugh: I hope you realize that your parents aren't completely clueless. Have you tried sitting down with them and having a mature discussion about it?

    BTW, I took the bitches part from your post ;)
     
  11. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    How many times do I have to say it until you get it? It is HER car. She is home A LOT. She goes to college so close to home, she can come by and take her car WHENEVER she wants. When she is home, I CANNOT use the car. Do you understand yet?

    Your right, why would I want to spend my time working and paying for a car when I have hers, but I don't have hers. If I could use her car whenever I wanted, I wouldn't want to buy a car, but that is not the case.

    I'm not trying to battle with you, your just giving your advice and I appreciate your sense of helping me, but I don't think you realize how little time I will have with her car. Next summer, I will not be able to use her car at all. If you were me, would you want to stay home all summer and do nothing? I highly doubt it.

    My parents will not take the time to have a mature discussion about it. Whenever I mention it, they just end the arguement with "NO." Trust me, I tried. But I do appreciate your advice, even though I don't show it.

    And I'm sure you were trying to piss me off with your last line in the quoted text, and it worked.
     
  12. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Have you tried explaining this to them? Why won't they sit down with you to talk to you about it? It doesn't really make sense to me. It seems to me that there might be more to this story than you are explaining.

    How are your grades? Are you an overall "good" kid or do you go out and party a lot? Could that have anything to do with it?

    You also did not say she was home a lot. "I keep asking them that what am I going to do when she comes home for vacation? She comes home for a month for Xmas, like 3 months for summer, plus all the other small vacations that she would come home for. It's her car so she gets to use it when shes home so I'll be out of luck and there are no other cars to use. "
    The way you made it sound was that it would be doable. Surely you can find other means of transportation when she is home? I am not as thick skulled as you seem to think I am, I simply see the situation from the eyes of a parent and you see it from the eyes of a child (teenager). Obviously we will have different views on things.

    Do you absolutely HAVE to have a car? What for? How have you been managing so far?

    I actually wasn't trying to piss you off, I was simply clarifying what I had previously said. :)

    edit: I would like to apologize for what I said in my first post. I could have thought of a better way to put that, but I didn't.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 5, 2006
  13. Drifter87

    Drifter87 Yippi-kay-ay, Motherfucker

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    Owning a car takes lots of money and responsibility. Since you are 17 your insurance will be insanely high, also since you are a new driver, I bet you will be street racing or speeding a lot and won't be able to afford the tickets.

    Remember you need money for Insurance, Repairs, and GAS. My monthly bill for my car before repairs is $200-300 (Depends on how much gas I use), then repairs. Say goodbye to any fun, because your car will command almost all your money.

    Also another things, zx3 is a ford yes? Fords suck, never get one, that POS will break down atleast once a month. Get a japanese car, they last forever. I'm driving a 1988 Nissan 300zx, and I've had no troubles (*knock on wood*)

    To be honest, they way I got my car... once I Turned 18, I went out, found a car I really liked and bought it. My parents knew nothing until I pulled up in it one day. The key was, I took care of EVERYTHING. So when I drove home the car was 100% mine with all the loose ends tied up.
     
  14. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Drive sis's car and get a bicycle for when she's home. Bank your money for hookers and beer at college next year. Soon you'll be 18 and you can do whatever the fuck you want then.
     
  15. metalfan111

    metalfan111 Guest

    I have a 3.0 overall and I am a good kid. I do like to go out and have fun, but I know my limits and I never get in trouble. I'm actually known as the responsible guy in my group of friends, even though you probably find that hard to believe.

    I'm sorry if I worded it wrong but I did mean to originally say she is home a lot.

    There aren't really any other reliable modes of transportation when she is home. My parents don't like my friends driving me places. They only like me driving when no one is in the car. So that eliminates the idea of friends giving me a ride. Public transportation would be a major pain in the ass and wouldn't work, I've tried it before. A car of my own would make things much easier, but I'll have to keep thinking of something because I don't think they will change their mind.

    I think I have to have a car. I just don't see any other way of getting places. I want a car of my own so I can go out with friends whenever I want, but that isn't possible if I'm left with my sisters car.

    For the past 2 months, I haven't done shit. I've gone out like twice and that was because I paid my oldest brother (23 y/o) to drive me somewhere, but that will not happen again. My mom has been driving me to work, but only because it is literally 45 seconds away. I tried getting my parents to drive me other places, but they just don't have time. My dad has 2 jobs and my mom is always busy with her job. I haven't done shit because I have no ride anywhere, and it will be like this until I get my own car.

    And just to let you know, it's actually nice to get a parent's point of view on this. :)
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 5, 2006
  16. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Have your friend pick you up, or get a bicycle and use public transportation. Its not that hard. In life you will learn that longing for physical possessions causes nothing but suffering. Be happy with what you have. Getting new shit does not solve the fundamental problem longing for new shit.
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2006
  17. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    See, this right here pretty much proves you're an ignorant, disrespectful, immature little prick. You don't deserve jackshit from your parents as far as I'm concerned.

    You're just a dumb kid, which as is typical with teenagers, you think you own the world and know everything. Wake up call, brat: YOU DON'T!! And until such time that you're willing to maturely and calmly have a discussion with your parents about it, you won't get ANYWHERE. I'm 100% sure they have rational reasons for their decision, you just don't have the time to see that -- you want what you want, and you want it NOW. Talk about fucking spoiled! What's next, you gonna throw a temper tantrum, 3-year-old style? :hsugh:

    Good luck with that.

    (See how it feels to have someone give you that kind of attitude and talk to/about you so disrespectfully?)
     
  18. big 1

    big 1 New Member

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    okay, im in my early 20s and i live in canada. Here, in toronto, a 25 year old male pays 4000 a year for insurance. (im not joking.)thats a LOT more than what you guys pay there down in the states. My point is that up here in the greateer toronto area, not may young people under 25 own their own cars, beause its too damn expensive.
    Now, I am a university student in my early 20s. I drive my parents car to work, and bus it the rest of the time. I dont complain to my parents about getting a car, even though i have close to 15,000 in a savings account.... this is because i am greateful to them for letting me live with them when i go to school....
    I know if MY parents let me use my sisters car when she was away, i would be SO GRATEFUL and thankful that they let me do even that, because i understand how hard it is to pay for/maintain a car.
    Do yourself a fvor and wait until your older to get yourself a car, and use your sister's car for now.....and be thankful you can even do THAT.
     
  19. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    This is my story. I'm 18 now, but when I turned 16, my parents gave me their old car. My god, life suddenly got 10x easier and more stress free. I had a car that I could drive to work, go out in, run errans, etc. Simply put, a car is freedom. It is very understandable why he would want a car, as I did a few years back. Sure it's expensive but worth it only in the short term. Eventually, you wont want to go to work, you won't want to be the DD, you will wish you had your money instead. Trust me, i'm in your age bracket and I am telling you that it is better in the long run to put up with the bullshit of "getting rides" from parents. I know it looks "gay" for someone your age to be driven around by your parents, but I wonder who the "gay" person will be when you have money saved up. Also, if you have any friends you can always hitch rides from them. You will have to reach a compromise with your parents to at least allow you to be in a car with a few friends. I know this, I am currently in the process of dumping all my money into an offroading truck I am building and everyday I wish I would of just saved my money.

    So, just wait the extra year or whatever and buy something nicer that will last you more than a few month between breakdowns. If you dont, I must warn you, you will be working just to maintain your car and you won't have any money left over for yourself.
     
  20. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    btw, why the hell wont you ride a bike to work if it is 45 seconds away by car?
     
  21. Hootahz314

    Hootahz314 I have daddy issues

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    Perhaps your parents won't give you any reason as to why you can't have your own car because you won't listen. You'll just tell yourself that it's a stupid reason thus having something else to bitch about (ie. They are choosing their battles wisely). You have your sisters car for when she's NOT there so quit dwelling on the times that she will be. You're luckier than most.
     
  22. illmaceyougood

    illmaceyougood New Member

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    I don't think he's "an ignorant spoiled little prick." He seems like a pretty reasonable guy. He worked hard and saved up, and he has every right to buy a car. It's HIS money. As long as he pays for everything, and it's not too expensive, it doesn't seem like much of a problem. Sounds like you're just looking for a bone to pick.

    BTW, to the thread starter, I wouldn't put too much stock into the people who are dissing you. BlazinBlazer Guy and 03 white zx3 are people who get upset over dirty jokes and hitting on people just for sex, i.e. they're easily offended.
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2006
  23. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Yeah I got a car at 16 too. And almost killed myself and others many times. 16 year olds can't drive for shit. I'm glad he's not on the road.
     
  24. pixing

    pixing New Member

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    or walk

    I understand that a car = freedom, but you don't need it for work so the most sensible thing is to bank your money and use your sister's or parents car when you can.

    I think those of us past your age know that cars cost a LOT more than the initial outlay - continuing maintenance is a big expense. Save your money kid.
     
  25. XPX

    XPX New Member

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    I'd go nuts aswell, you worked hard for the money and that shows responsibility, why can't they understand that?

    Don't dish out the possibility that they may have a hidden agenda for you and you buying a car would fuck it up....maybe they have a car for you or have plans to send you to a nice college....:dunno:
     

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