COMIC Maxim Magazine's - The Hottest 15 Women in Comics

Discussion in 'Entertainment' started by SBrooks1, May 15, 2007.

  1. SBrooks1

    SBrooks1 GOAT OT Supporter

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    [​IMG]

    15. Jonni Future
    Abilities: Space/time travel, deft at being both hero and damsel in distress in the same story
    The niece of space-faring adventurer Johnny Future, Jonni inherited a fish-shaped spaceship, an inter-dimensional time portal, and a funky helmet that lets her understand all languages (but the sheer top that fails to harness her, um, other abilities is all her). She hangs out with a half-man, half-cheetah who's constantly trying to bone her. We hear you, brother.

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    14. Zatanna
    Abilities: Magic! (cue thunder crash, doves, and Doug Henning–style rainbows)
    Dressed like the house magician at a brothel, the top hat-and-fishnet-clad Zatanna really blurs that line between "superhero costume" and "role-playing fetish wear." Her thing is that anything she says backward comes to pass, so: "sretcarahc neM-X fo egdelwonk cidepolcycne na htiw nem denniks-ytsap rof erised elbaitasni na evah uoY."

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    13. Storm
    Abilities: Makes the rain down in Af-ri-caaaa…
    Before she became a superhero, Storm was worshipped as a goddess in her native Africa. So whether your tastes run toward the classic long-hair-and-cape Storm or the mid-'80s Mohawk-and-leather-gear Storm (we pass no judgments), she's that right mix of haughtiness and hotness. It would be like sleeping with your female boss. Just be prepared for a constant hailstorm in your living room should you ever break up with her.

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    12. Vampirella
    Abilities: Blood-sucking, can turn into a bat, can sprout wings
    Unless you live in West Hollywood, you probably don't run into many space vampires in knee-high boots. Although Vampirella has been a comic book sex icon for years, there's a terrifyingly skanky freakiness about her that tells you that you'd wake up the next morning tied to a pentagram-shaped bed covered in candle wax and goat's blood. Once in a while? Sure. But not every day.

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    11. X-23
    Abilities: Claws in her hands and feet, enhanced senses, marketing gold mine
    Most fans know that all Marvel has to do to sell a comic is slap Wolverine on the cover. Well somewhere along the line, someone got the idea: "Hey, what if there was a hot female Wolverine clone who worked as a vaguely underage prostitute?" Cynical marketing ploy? Absolutely. Fan boy Kryptonite? Without question. It's like the coolness of Wolverine mixed with that pervy "I shouldn't be into this" feeling you get when you watch Natalie Portman in The Professional. Perfecto!

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    10. Power Girl
    Abilities: Superstrength, flight, overpowering distraction techniques. Two big, round, firm distraction techniques
    Power Girl's origin is more convoluted than Desmond's story line on Lost. So just know that she's kind of like Supergirl; but instead of a big red "S" on her chest, she has a gaping hole where her breasts hang out. Mix that with the whole damaged, lost soul thing she has going on and you know that if she didn't have superpowers she'd be in a Vegas hotel room with Rocco Siffredi right now.

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    9. Nancy Callahan
    Abilities: Can strip for hours without taking a break
    Even a walking Mack truck like Marv—who can shrug off getting shot, stabbed, run over, and nearly drowned—gets weak in the knees when he's around Nancy. Her hotness is so powerful, it's only when she's onstage that the residents of Sin City stop killing each other. Once again, our belief that world peace is only attainable through the widespread availability of assless chaps is proven. Hey, Bono, you need to reprioritize, mate.

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    8. She-Hulk
    Abilities: Superstrength, litigation
    She-Hulk is a statuesque beauty with brains to match. So as long as you don't mind her opening the door for you, you've got yourself one hot fantasy object. It would be like sleeping with Chyna if she were a woman. Plus, as a lawyer by day and superhero by, um, working lunch, She-Hulk isn't all "Hulk Smash!" like her idiot cousin. And there's no better conversation starter than, "Hey, dudes, once you go green…"

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    7. Lois Lane
    Abilities: Typing, getting captured
    Sometimes you don't need heat vision or magic powers, you just need a nice, normal workingwoman. Lois is like that career woman who has sacrificed a personal life for the sake of her job; but you know there's a leather corset somewhere underneath all those neatly pressed suits. So what if her on-again, off-again, possible husband is Superman? You've got so much more to offer—you have a one-bedroom apartment with no roommates!

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    6. Caitlin Fairchild
    Abilities: Superstrength, endurance, flimsy costume
    Caitlin Fairchild was a meek little computer nerd, who, one fine day, turned into a tall drink of whoop-ass. Unlike a lot of the heroines on this list, though, Fairchild at least has the decency to wear comicdom's most poorly constructed costume—we swear we caught one issue of Gen 13 where her uniform shredded as she opened a car door. God bless her for that.

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    5. Witchblade
    Abilities: Supernatural armor with mystical weapons, extensive clothing budget
    The Witchblade is a magical artifact that a) can only bond with women and b) has to remove all of the host's clothing in order to function properly. Exactly. Not the best argument against the predominance of men in comic book writing jobs. Many have worn the 'Blade, but none have looked hotter than former NYPD homicide cop Sara Pezzini. A sassy Italian New Yorker whose pasties and G-string can harness ancient power? We're going without a fight, ma'am.

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    4. Shanna the She-Devil
    Abilities: Jungle love (oh-e-oh-e-oh)
    If you took the Tarzan story and replaced the small English child lost in the jungle with Pamela Anderson, you'd get the gravity-defying awesomeness of Shanna. She doesn't understand your advanced, city-dwelling ways, stranger. She was raised in an untouched jungle paradise. What's that? It's customary for women in your world to instantly disrobe when they meet men? OK…if you say so, outsider. Could you hold this spear?

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    3. Black Cat
    Abilities: Bad luck powers, able to ignore existence of guy's wife, girlfriend
    For a guy who complains about his life sucking, Peter Parker scores some seriously A-list tail (literally). His wife is a supermodel (wah!), and he's constantly fighting off the advances of an impossibly hot former burglar whose catsuit can barely contain her heaving womanhood (boo fucking hoo). If you find yourself arguing that Black Cat is nothing more than a cheap Catwoman rip-off, however, you may be beyond our help.

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    2. Emma Frost
    Abilities: Can read your mind. And, no, she's not going to bend over and pick that up
    Icy, bitchy Emma doesn't so much wear a costume as let a few cocktail napkins stick to her body wherever they happen to land. She's stuck-up, condescending, and knows everything you're thinking—stick a riding crop in her hand and you'll be screaming, "Thank you, ma'am, may I have another?" in no time. Any wonder why she's also known as "the White Queen"?

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    1. Wonder Woman
    Abilities: Superstrength, flight, star-spangled panties
    C'mon, this one's a no-brainer. From the red go-go boots to the patriotic underwear to the armor that both lifts and separates, she is perfection. Wonder Woman commands much respect, even from Superman and Batman (although they're totally afraid to touch her golden "lasso of truth" for fear one of them would uncontrollably blurt out "threesome!"). You've got to give it up for the OG of comic book hotties.

    http://www.maximonline.com/slideshows/index.aspx?slideId=3422&imgCollectId=180
     
  2. siniquezu

    siniquezu New Member

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    :wackit: but they need better pictures
     
  3. axio

    axio New Member

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    I'm really getting sick of non-comic book readers writing all these fucking lists because of SM3.
     
  4. siniquezu

    siniquezu New Member

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    yeah, the list is all over the place
     
  5. THE LIOG

    THE LIOG EVVVVVVVVEERRYYOONNNNNNNE EEEEE

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    x-23? isnt that a bit too....Tomash?
     
  6. gthesob

    gthesob the fun machine took a shit and died OT Supporter

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    :bowrofl:
     
  7. Crunks

    Crunks Active Member

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    mmmm emma
     
  8. Draven2575

    Draven2575 Taking one responsibility at a time

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    the list is pure shit
    power girl alone should be in the top three
    what the fuck is x-23 doing there??? same goes for storm, nancy (the fuck are they thinking), and cat (fairchild)???
     
  9. Kurt Wagner

    Kurt Wagner New Member

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    Wonder Woman at number 1 :ugh:

    Fuck that, I bet that fucking whore doesnt even shave her snatch.
     
  10. Draven2575

    Draven2575 Taking one responsibility at a time

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    and the what the hell is lois lane doing on the list???
    not even jim lee can save that ho
     
  11. kelvs

    kelvs OT Supporter

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    Sara Pezzini

    :drool:

    :wackit::wackit::wackit::wackit:
     
  12. droopz

    droopz New Member

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    My top 5 would have been something like;

    1. Witchblade
    2. Fathom
    3. Emma Front
    4. Fairchild
    5. Lara Croft (from the Witchblade C-overs)
     
  13. siniquezu

    siniquezu New Member

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    some that I would have included:
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  14. Highlander_77

    Highlander_77 Wicked smaht

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    As I said when this list was posted in the main forum...wtf?

    Where's Mary Jane Watson Parker? Psylocke? Rogue? Catwoman (they pick Black Cat over Catwoman? Please...:rolleyes:)

    And Jonni Future (who)? Storm? Lois freakin' Lane?! Seriously?!
     
  15. TotalEclipse

    TotalEclipse New Member

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    I always had a thing for Rogue and Psylocke...
     
  16. DevPool

    DevPool So you like to play games, huh!?

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    I laughed quite a bit. Still obvious that non-nerds wrote it. *shakes fist*
     
  17. amalgamas

    amalgamas OT Supporter

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    Depending on which version of x-23 you're talking about she could make the list without her being jailbait. If I remember correctly, by the time she made it to the new x-men she was 18.

    Anyways, I never thought that WW should've been first, I don't know who I would've chosen for #1, but it wouldn't have been her.
     
  18. Shinigami

    Shinigami New Member

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    X-23 / Target X


    anyone uploaded those comics to WarSkrull yet? :naughty:
     
  19. Shinigami

    Shinigami New Member

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    I almost spat out my water reading this lol
     
  20. Draven2575

    Draven2575 Taking one responsibility at a time

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    fucking maxin writers don't know shit
    hell even the new poll of hot game covers SUCKS
     
  21. gthesob

    gthesob the fun machine took a shit and died OT Supporter

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    Both series' are up.
     
  22. Draven2575

    Draven2575 Taking one responsibility at a time

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    my poll would've included:
    rogue
    psylocke
    jean grey
    catwoman
    blackcat
    lady death
    cat fairchild
    monika
    huntress
    harley quinn
    powergirl
    witchblade
    emma frost
    susan storm

    these are current/most seen/read girls
    i didn't include lara croft (more video game girl), and mary jane/lois lane-no super powers/don't do shit other than get captured
     
  23. Shinigami

    Shinigami New Member

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    under what? i cant find them lol :o
     
  24. twofaze

    twofaze H.N.I.C.

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    ok....
     
  25. gthesob

    gthesob the fun machine took a shit and died OT Supporter

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    I upped the first series in Marvel (Hint: X is near the end of the alphabet :hsd:) and I finished the second where someone started it in Unsorted.
     

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