SRS Lying to impress other people...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Bona Fide, May 24, 2006.

  1. Bona Fide

    Bona Fide Guest

    So, for the past month or so, I've been telling my friends about this "girlfriend" that I've had. It just so happens that she's pretty hot as well. I found the pictures somewhere and passed them off as her. One of my friends caught on to me and confronted me about it. She's agreed not to tell anyone else, but I finally realized that I have a serious problem. I have a tendency to lie to other people about various things in order to make myself seem "cool". This, in my opinion, is absolutely ridiculous considering the amount of friends I have. Compulsive lying is usually characteristic of people that want friends because they have no other way of acquiring them. I'm not sure why I'm doing it, but the fact remains that I am.

    I'm going to start by telling the entire truth to the friend who found out, and I'll move out from there to other friends I know I can trust. I'll probably end up lying to the less "important" friends, saying that I broke up with her or something to that extent. What can I do to prevent this? I've sworn to myself that I'll never do this again, but what can I do to prevent a relapse?

    Help me, please.
     
  2. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    you dont need to tell everybody u lied. just dont do it any more.
     
  3. Isaac

    Isaac New Member

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    You could re-read your post in about a week and understand how lame that really is. What the hell do you care what other people think? Tell them your girlfriend is your hand. It's funny, and it's true.

    If you can develop a negative association with lying, especially on that scale, then you're building the foundation for truth. Think of yourself as the ultimate lameass for making up a fake girlfriend on the internet. Everytime you think of a way to lie to impress somebody, remember how damn lame that is.
     
  4. The Infamous

    The Infamous New Member

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    Have you realised yet that the amount of friends you have MAY be proportional to the amount of lies you've spun?

    LOL




    ...did I just collapse your house of cards :p
     
    Last edited: May 24, 2006
  5. Devilish

    Devilish Remind me AGAIN

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    Accept yourself for who you are, and then others might too.
     
  6. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    perhaps you have problems with codependency
     
  7. hezekiah

    hezekiah New Member

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    People do stuff like this-get past it and develop a better plan for starting relationships
     
  8. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    oh and you are not alone. most people lie or at least exaggerate.
     
  9. Bona Fide

    Bona Fide Guest

    No, it's really not that, considering this farce started in early May. I doubt I've gained much, if anything, from it.

    As much as I don't want to tell anyone, I feel like they deserve to know. It sucks to break someone's trust, and I'd rather they hear it from me than anyone else.
     
  10. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    I myself quitted lying completely , and look im managing in life too. I have nothing to hide, because i love, support and believe in myself i don't need anyone elses justification for any of my actions.Therefore i have no reason to lie. I regret the times that i did lie, because the only reason that you lie is because you feel that you aren't accepted elsewhise, in other words this means that you put the power of your life into the hands of others. You let the perception of others determine who you are as a person, you need to take the power of your life back in your own hands and think like this. There are 6 billion people in the world who all think differently about me, and i cannot possibly satisfy them all so why worry about what others think about me?

    When you feel that you have to lie, just tell the truth and see what the outcome is, and suprise suprise you will see that you like i can live thru it. Telling the truth has the great advantage that you can stop worrying, compared to lying where you ALWAYS are thinking 'what if they find out' , so give yourself some soul peace, and spead the truth.
     
  11. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

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    Lying to impress other people means you are projecting an image of yourself that is not really you. The people that befriend that image are essentially friends with someone that isn't real. In other words lying to impress others is a surefire way to gather lots of fake friends that don't really give a shit about the real you.

    Don't lie. Who cares what they think? For every action you take you can easily find 10 people that will praise you for it or condemn you for it. Be yourself and you'll find that the friendships you do make are much stronger and deeper than the ones that were based on the false image of you.
     
  12. Untoward

    Untoward New Member

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    you know? i still have the EXACT same problom. i lie just because, for no reason at all. and it usually gets me into alot of shit.

    but ill tell you what i did to stop that from happening

    as soon as u pull off a lie, and you realize it, correct yourself.

    simply say "oh that was my mistake i meant ------" you know?

    i know it souns a little sketchy but it really does help out alot. ive bin lie free for about 2 yrs. and trust me

    IF I CAN DO IT, SO CAN YOU.:wavey:
     
  13. Bona Fide

    Bona Fide Guest

    Thanks guys...this is helping me a lot.

    I think I misspoke when I said that I have a lot of friends and I lie. The problem is that I lie to my friends. The positive is that I know that they aren't my friends because I lie, since they were my friends before then. The negative is that I'm lying to my friends. Unfortunately, in the interest of keeping them as friends, I'm in a real moral dillema. I could either tell them the truth, at which point I'll lose all trust I had with them and perhaps a friendship or two. Or, I could lie one last time and clean this all up. I don't know what to do...
     
  14. vitamin dew

    vitamin dew New Member

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    Just say you broke up with her, and end it there. Stop lying.
     
  15. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    I have a brother who does this. He has no reason to lie but half of the things that come out of his mouth are either gross exaggerations or straight up lies. The funny thing is, all of us (his immediate family) KNOW when he is lying. No matter how good of a lie he comes up with, we can always tell. So when he lies, we know he is lying and it just makes him look stupid. We usually don't say anything to call him out on it, we just change the subject, but we all know. It's pretty stupid, and it usually has the opposite effect that he was probably looking for-which was to impress us or make his life seem more interesting.
     
  16. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    I could care less when someone lies to impress people. People lie constantly by putting on fake smiles, pretending to be friendly, etc. Few people are truly honest apart from when they are alone with themselves. And even then they have difficulty being honest...
     
  17. PoliticalPirate

    PoliticalPirate New Member

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    There was this guy in my high school that told everyone he went to Japan and many other numerous lies for the same reasons you probably tell lies.

    He had no idea that I and was very good and detecting lies, and eventually I told him to totally fuck off cause I was sick of the BS, which for him seemed out of no where. Trust me, lying is to be avoided, it causes more trouble than its worth, the only people I lie to are:

    1. Cops
    2. Parents
    3. Bums asking for change
    4. Telemarketers
     
  18. 2500

    2500 Guest

    yeah, don't lie to your friends, but lie to cops and your parents.....

    /sarcasm

    i will give my 2 cents for what its worth. i think you might almost be lying to yourself subconciously, and its manifesting itself as truth to your friends. hows your self esteem? how was your home life as a child? it may go deeper than just lying to people. when you were younger, did you know your parents loved you? did they show it for no reason? or did you grow up feeling they didn't love you unless.... you got an A, or unless it was a holiday, or, unless you did something to feel you deserved their love? i think you may be doing this as a way to feel you deserve to be loved or accepted. like, you don't feel good enough without a "girlfriend." its just a thought. i've done alot of research on codependancy and emotional abandonment in children, and, this seems like a logical side effect and could be the cause. thoughts, thread starter?
     
  19. svetlanalemon

    svetlanalemon A little blood and vomit on the car seat...

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    i agree

    try to also think of yourself in third person point of view. how lame would it be if someone made up a girlfriend just to impress others?
     
  20. Legend Zero

    Legend Zero OT Supporter

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    Seriously, maybe it may not be a bad idea to tell your closest friends.. I mean if they are truly your friends, they'd try to help you, you know confront you when a story seems a bit far-fetched, etc.. kinda get you through it and maybe help you out.. but on the other hand, they could also be somewhat ignorant and think everything you say is a lie and thus not belive many things when in fact they could be true.. i guess it depends 1. how good your friends are, and 2. how much support you need!

    You know you always got OT!
     

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