LTRs - how often do you go on dates?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by vizyn, Nov 3, 2009.

  1. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    Those of you in LTRs - how often do you go on dates? Do you take turns planning them? Does one person take the other person out more often?

    Girl I'm seeing said something along the lines of "why don't you take me on dates anymore.' 10 days ago we spent a great night in Boston and it was awesome.. last week I took her out to dinner once. I was planning on taking her out Thursday of this week. This is someone I've been seeing since about April. Does that really seem too few and far between? We see each other allllllllllll the time and we've both been super busy.. but does once-a-weekish for a true date not cut it?
     
  2. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    On a real date or just going out and doing shit together? Real date is like once a month. :rofl:
     
  3. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    lol. you just completely 100% cured my single-on-my-birthday-blues. Total flashback

    From experience, I would say that the very first thing you need to know is what her idea of a date is. That way you know very clearly what she is expecting. It is SOOOOO annoying to find out that you have been going through all this trouble and she doesn't think they are "real" dates for some BS technicality.

    In my opinion, 1 "real" date a week is pretty generous. Any girl that complains about 2+ "real" dates a month that meet her high standards for a "real" date is high maintenance.
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Why don't you flat out ask her "why don't you ever take me out?"
     
  5. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    She does occasionally.. last week she "took" me to a hockey game when my favorite team was in town ("took" meaning I paid the way). Though, she did get upset when I didn't take her out to dinner afterwards. Though that's another story in and of itself.
     
  6. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    bitch sounds like a freeloading slampig. pump and dump.
     
  7. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :ugh: Sounds like you got yourself a real winner :hsugh:

    You've only been dating like 5 months and she's pulling the "you don't take me out enough!" already. If you're paying almost every single time as well you're a sucker and need to slap yourself for letting her walk all over you.
     
  8. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    when I met her she wasn't, however, she got herself into money trouble by spending way too much (some of which was on me, but mostly on drinking). she now owes like ~2k in back rent and is trying to renew her lease right now so she doesn't have really any money to spend.
     
  9. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    She used to pay for things..until she dug herself into a financial hole.
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Soooooo it's your job to still treat her with your own money because you managed it better?
     
  11. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    Heh, she tells me we don't have to do things that cost money..but I don't often find free things to do that live up to her standard of a date. Especially now that it's getting colder.
     
  12. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    This is all about compromise. You can start thinking up free "events" and tell her she has to do the same. There's no rule that men are the only one's who have to be romantic and plan dates. Since she is a money-grubbing whore, she should be pulling her weight by also planning money-free dates.
     
  13. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    Also, she justified her bringing it up today due to a fight we had this weekend that was, admittedly, the result of me acting like a douche. "It's been three days and you still haven't made it up to me"
     
  14. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :ugh:

    I don't care if you were a super douche. If any girl says "you have to make it up to me" you need to wake up and realize you are dating a spoiled bitch. You seriously need to find a new girlfriend brother.
     
  15. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    In my experience, when a woman says "we never go on dates!" or "why don't we ever go out on dates?" it does NO GOOD to argue and recite all the times you HAVE recently. She doesn't care. She probably just wants to go out that night or the next night. She can't possibly think you never go out, because you actually do. She's either just blowing up to make a point and get her way, or something else awful. Either way, it probably spells trouble.

    Also, consider her comment could be but a small display of a larger, more scary monster lurking inside...

    and this:
     
  16. vizyn

    vizyn New Member

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    I've been contemplating it. It's a pretty shitty cycle we go through... I feel like she victimizes herself all the time for the attention. I told her that. Didn't go over well.
     
  17. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    Sounds like a selfish, self centered disrespectful little girl to me.
     
  18. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :werd:
     
  19. calisteph6

    calisteph6 Active Member

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    My BF and I go out to eat 1-2x a week and probably do another activity 1x a week. Most aren't planned. He plans probably 1x a month and me probably 2x a month. I wish he would plan more.
     
  20. Helios

    Helios New Member

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    I don't really get what a "date" is in the context of a ltr, imo a date means going somewhere to get to know someone.

    If you mean just going out to eat and doing shit, we do that all the time, it's just called living and not being a homebody. :dunno:
     
  21. Deborah

    Deborah Seeing is believing, but I don't want to know.

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    I don't get what people mean by real dates. But we used to go out, do something, eat or watch a movie like once a week.

    your gf sounds selfish, anytime I asked for eating out I wanted to pay and anytime he asked, he wanted to pay. It's just something weird about saying "YOU should take me out tonight".
     
  22. calisteph6

    calisteph6 Active Member

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    I guess a real date is a pre-planned thing...and I would think just going out to eat doesn't count.

    spur of the moment things or going out for a quick bite are just activities. :dunno: My BF and I argue about this subject a lot. lol But we don't argue about who pays.
     
  23. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    even weirder when you say "you fucked up and im mad because you didn't take me out yesterday, the day before or practically ever :rolleyes. take me out god damnit! Oh you don't really want to take me out? if you aren't going to be happy then this isnt a real date so it doesn't count. So pay the check and lets get out of here because im still mad that you never take me out."
     
  24. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I don't think we men will ever understand what the big deal is. I just throw it in the category of shoes and chocolate as things I know but will never understand. Its weird as hell for someone to get mad because someone else didn't come up with the idea and take the initiative to plan a recreational activity that they didn't want do to but you did. You girls should be lucky we have enough man guilt that we actually even feel bad when you say "you never take me out!"

    A woman would laugh in a mans face if he ever said "Why don't you ever plan a poker night for me?"
     
  25. calisteph6

    calisteph6 Active Member

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    lol, my BF likes chocolate more than me. I will eat anything sweet but I'd pick other candies or ice cream first.
     

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