SRS Lot's o' problems

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by wtfmates, Jan 12, 2005.

  1. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Well, lets see. I need some help I think. Not medication or anything, just some help from you guys. Or I might have just come to bitch. I don't really know. Whatever, get comfortable.

    Life is pretty much meaningless to me. Really. To me, there is no point to life. Before it there is nothing, after it there is nothing. It's short and meaningless. I am also always feeling like it is nothing but an illusion and non of it is real.

    Really there is no goddamn purpose to any of it. It's monotonous. Same thing every day. Go to school, come home, eat, shit, go to sleep, wake up in morning and repeat. It's hard to deal with.

    I have severe social problems. I never talk to anybody, no matter how much I want to. Someone talks to me I get nervous, flush, and answer thier questions as directly and briefly as possible. I hate being around people because I always feel extremely nervous and like everybody is watching me.

    Thier are also anger control problems and mood swings that I have. I am always snapping at the few people I am closest to and driving them away. Little things set me off big time.

    All I ever do is sit around the house, scratch my ass, and use the computer. I can never bring myself to do anything else. Am lazy and lack any motivation whatsoever. Because what does it matter in the long run if I don't do my work, or go out? It doesn't. We are all dead in the end anyways. Everything that I try to be good at, I fail at miserably. Guitar for example.

    I am extremely fucking negative.

    I hate attention yet always want it.

    I don't know what the fuck I want, really.

    I do really wish I could have came up with a better name for the thread.

    The only way I escape from everyday life is reading and watching movies.

    I often think of just saying "Fuck it" and ending it all. I know I shouldn't think like this though. I've got a whole life ahead of me. I haven't gotten a chance to experience anything the world has to offer yet, in my short 16 years of existance, but I just can't stop myself from thinking that way.

    Ok, I guess I am done now. Did you enjoy reading the bitch session?
     
    Last edited: Jan 12, 2005
  2. XsLiCk

    XsLiCk New Member

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    eh i feel you man... for me its the same thing day after day in and out and i frankly am tired of it... i can't deal with it either... i guess i don't have as bad social problems as u do... but still for me its pretty bad...
     
  3. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Volunteer?
     
  4. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    http://www.mental-health-matters.com/disorders/dis_details.php?disID=95

    I don't know if this'll help, but I like this site. Helped me figure out a few things about myself. If the linked page isn't a good one pertaining to you there is alot in here you can search on. (scroll down for more on social anxiety)
    You sound bummed. I hope things can change for the better.
    Best wishes.
     
  5. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Sounds a tad bit like me. Well, maybe more than a tad bit.
     
  6. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    What now, for you?
     
  7. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    Someone w/social anxiety isn't a likely candidate to volunteer. Possibly, after they get a handle on the problem.
    In the meantime, just being out in public, & having to deal with people is extremely draining, & difficult.
    Forcing social interaction can help, but I had the same problem. It took until current day for me to stop being as reclusive as I could be, & still survive.
    I was going to suggest finding someone you feel comfortable talking with about it on a regular basis. Possibly looking into medication.
    I want to point out that I haven't taken any medication for it. Some definetly may have been helpful to me when I was a bit younger. But, I'm in my early thirties, & it took me this long to get a handle on it.
    Also, wtfmates, it's a fairly common thing, you are not alone.
    If you ever feel the need, you may PM me.
    Best wishes, D.
     
  8. infinite loop

    infinite loop Statistically speaking, the Yankees do indeed suck

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    Agree 100%

    I've been feeling down for several months now, I'm looking into getting one or both of my dogs training to start working with hospital patients as therapy pets.

    I can't say I've been in your shoes before, but I think we all reach a point in our lives where we feel insignificant and lose feeling of self-worth. YOu have to find some way to snap out of it, I have a feeling volunteering will help.
     
  9. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    I don't know what I am going to do about it. I've tried forcing social interaction, but it never works. I don't have anybody to talk to about it. Me and my mom are far from close and my father lives 400 miles away. We are friendly with each other, but I don't get to talk to him much. My only friend is a cool person to hang around with, but he is immature and can never hold a serious conversation. So, yeah. And thanks for the offer.
     
  10. dave steel

    dave steel My Kung Fu is the best.

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    I think you're a hard core introvert. (I'm one too.)

    Take the test and lest us know what you got. (I scored 100 for introvert.)

    http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

    http://www.humanmetrics.com/index.htm#intro

    Plan a future after HS that fits your personailty.

    http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=36E7TD9YN6&isbn=0316880655&itm=7

    Try not to get blind sided by situations that make you tense. Think about how you would like to "act" in any given situation and practice. Also, read some stuff on body language. If you "act" more relaxed, you will find yourself being more relaxed. (Acting is a good navigating tool for us introverts.) In fact if you can, get into the drama/theater club at school.

    Finally, suicide isn't a smart option.

    http://www.psycom.net/depression.central.suicide.html
     
  11. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Took the test and got 100 Introvert, 1 emotion, 60 thinking, and 56 percieving.

    I might just take your advice and buy that book. I haven't been thinking much about my future, because I never really planned on having one. And I just don't think about it much. Thanks for the advice.
     
  12. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    Thankyou, Dave Steel, sound advice. :cool:

    Benzodiazepines(-addictive), paxil, and zoloft (anti-depressants) are, from what I hear, the most common treatments for generalized social anxiety disorder. Below are the methods I've read that are FDA approved. I'm not sure what country you're in.

    Treatments:
    Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs)
    Serotonin norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (SNRI)
    Benzodiazepines
    Monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs)
    Gabapentin
    Beta-blockers

    If your Mom has health care for you maybe a visit to a doctor is in order.
    If you do, tell him/her straight up what you've been dealing with.
    If I were you I would research the medications myself. Take control of your own treatment. Know what you are putting in your body. Also, check drug interactions.
    I agree guys, volunteer work is rewarding, and an excellent way to get someone "outside of themselves." It gives you perspective, and less time to focus on your troubles.
    However, with this particular problem, social interaction simply becomes unbearable. The person in question has enough trouble just making it through the day, work, school, whatever.
    Perhaps down the line volunteer work would be an option.
    In the meantime, please do some research. Knowledge is power. Google social anxiety disorder, and only look at the sites that aren't selling something. It really is quite common.
    PM anytime, if you need. I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
     
  13. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Thanks for the information, advice, and your time. I'll look up those different medications and some more info on Social Anxiety Disorder, which isn't my only problem, but hopefully by getting over it finally (been 2 years), I will become a bit less depressed. Or something.
     
  14. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    Usually I end up feeling really fucking useless when I try to help anyone, so thankyou.
     
  15. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    My mother wants to send me to a shrink. Good move or bad move?
     
  16. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Don't look up medications. Forget about that. Work that out with your doctor, if he thinks you need it. You've come here for advice... now maybe try going to a professional for more.

    YES, go and talk to a psychologist. No reason not to. Tell them what you told us. It will help. Makes you feel good to go in there and dump all your shit all over the pshrink and you walk out and feel better. Its so cathartic.
     
  17. dave steel

    dave steel My Kung Fu is the best.

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    I agree with peyomp. If you can, it would be nice to talk your stuff over with a psychiatrist. Still, proceed with caution. You're wise for your years to consider the fabric of your personality, many people don't know who they are (they never will) and they just follow the masses. Get a good understanding of your introverted side. This book is mandatory reading for introverts...http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/A...98/sr=2-1/ref=pd_ka_b_2_1/103-6219770-5394202 They have it used for under a buck. It's a great luxury to be an introvert (if you know how to navigate in an extroverted world.) You can do this.

    http://www.theintrovertzcoach.com/
     
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2005
  18. Brinley

    Brinley Isis - Goddess of Creation

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    I was a lot like what you're describing when I was a teen too. Probably the only thing that helped me was that I have a twin sister who is the exact opposite. So, she forced me to interact socially, and she was also my crutch. However, now that I am an adult and my sister lives 2200 miles away, I'm kinda on my own. One thing I must say is that you are suffering from depression, go see a doctor right away! Anti-depressants weren't an option for me when I was a teen because my dad doesn't believe in depression. However, now I am on my own and on my anti-depressants and life is MUCH better. I now think about the meaning of life, instead of the meaninglessness of life.

    It's an awesome start that your mom is willing to send you to therapy, DEFINITELY go. It helps so much just to have someone objective to talk to, that won't judge you, and that you don't really have to look in the eye on a day to day basis and wonder what they think of you.

    As far as volunteering, it's an excellent idea. The Humane society is ALWAYS looking for volunteers to help with the animals, maybe that would be a small step towards coming out of your shell. I mean, they aren't people, and animals always make me feel better. They are so loving, and simple.

    Whatever you do, good luck, and don't think you are the only one out there. It is common, and most people just write it off as adolescence.
     
  19. D

    D A guiltless state of self awareness.. The process

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    [sarcasm]Yeah, you don't want to make any educated decisions for yourself. Trust everyone else to do that for you.[/sarcasm]
     
  20. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    Dude, you are 16... 16 fucking years old. You have your entire life ahead of you, and you still have the chance to bust your ass in school for the job you want.

    Suicide would be such a waste. My brain would hurt just thinking about you offing yourself.

    Listen. Read my thread. Give it a good read if you actually give a fuck. I know what you are going through, I've been there. And I overcame.

    http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=1468667

    Send me a PM. Tell me about yourself and shit. I will give you advice if you want it, or just teach you how to deal with it yourself.

    The balls in your court.
     
  21. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    You make my brain ache. Such ignorance, and it's so common nowadays.

    Sigh... social anxiety disorder, depression, and any problem in your head is not an easy thing to fix.

    What you don't understand is there is a chemical imbalance in the brain. The person rationally understands that there is something wrong with them. Mind over matter does not apply here. These people suffer from a mental illness that needs treatment. They aren't crazy, they are normal people.

    He can't just go out and do this or that. I know exactly how he feels because I suffered from generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder and performance anxiety.

    Imagine joining a club. You walk in and sit down with the people there... you are shaking. Your hands start sweating. "Why is everyone looking at me???" and other irrational thoughts.

    This is because adrenaline is being released at the wrong times. Fight or flight response. Get it?

    I'm not trying to come down hard on you, but if you intend to come into a forum created to help people, maybe you should read about their problem before giving advice.
     
  22. Dethfat

    Dethfat New Member

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    you have no problem going to people and being social, you just dont want to, u came to OT didnt you:wavey: , overcome yourself, its your mind and body, u make your own decisions, tis not easy at first but once you realize that you control your future and present, you;ll be ok buddy, trust me, it took me few years also, it takes everyone a few years
     
  23. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    There is no meaning to life and that is what makes living it so hard for me. There is a constant weight on my heart that I can literally feel. I don't want to accept the meaninglessness of life, but I know there is no meaning.

    "Life (a river arising from no spring and flowing endlessly to no sea)"

    And then there is the social anxiety, my anger problems, my self-image and self-confidance problems. Is living really worth it? Wether we live or die has no consequence, so why not off myself?
     
  24. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    :werd: Exactly.

    Thanks again to all of you for your time and advice.
     
  25. wtfmates

    wtfmates New Member

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    Ok, well the social problems are gone with. Not giving a shit aboout anything helped a lot. It could have improved my life had it been earlier, but now it is too little too late I guess. So farewell. Maybe we will speak again, but I doubt it. Thanks for all the help.
     

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