Well, lets see. I need some help I think. Not medication or anything, just some help from you guys. Or I might have just come to bitch. I don't really know. Whatever, get comfortable. Life is pretty much meaningless to me. Really. To me, there is no point to life. Before it there is nothing, after it there is nothing. It's short and meaningless. I am also always feeling like it is nothing but an illusion and non of it is real. Really there is no goddamn purpose to any of it. It's monotonous. Same thing every day. Go to school, come home, eat, shit, go to sleep, wake up in morning and repeat. It's hard to deal with. I have severe social problems. I never talk to anybody, no matter how much I want to. Someone talks to me I get nervous, flush, and answer thier questions as directly and briefly as possible. I hate being around people because I always feel extremely nervous and like everybody is watching me. Thier are also anger control problems and mood swings that I have. I am always snapping at the few people I am closest to and driving them away. Little things set me off big time. All I ever do is sit around the house, scratch my ass, and use the computer. I can never bring myself to do anything else. Am lazy and lack any motivation whatsoever. Because what does it matter in the long run if I don't do my work, or go out? It doesn't. We are all dead in the end anyways. Everything that I try to be good at, I fail at miserably. Guitar for example. I am extremely fucking negative. I hate attention yet always want it. I don't know what the fuck I want, really. I do really wish I could have came up with a better name for the thread. The only way I escape from everyday life is reading and watching movies. I often think of just saying "Fuck it" and ending it all. I know I shouldn't think like this though. I've got a whole life ahead of me. I haven't gotten a chance to experience anything the world has to offer yet, in my short 16 years of existance, but I just can't stop myself from thinking that way. Ok, I guess I am done now. Did you enjoy reading the bitch session?